Not sure if this is a vent or looking for advice how to respond or others that have been out in a similar position but I just needed to get this out...
We received this lovely little email this evening-
So dad and I have had a little chat and decided not to have everyone over for Xmas anymore. You both have your own homes and children now. We understand you are really busy this time of year and it would be really hard to continue to come spend Christmas Eve with us.
Add in to fact xxxx (that's me) will now have a newborn on her hands, it would be such a stress to come out to us and not fair on her.
We know it is important for your kids to be at home in their own beds to open presents at the tree in their own home Christmas morning.
It was around your age that we wanted to step away from the parents and we wanted to start creating our own traditions and we know you will be wanting to do the same with your families.
Maybe if you have time we can arrange to have a big family lunch at the beginning of December before things get too busy for you or in the middle of January.
Have a chat and let us know what you think.
WTF?!? We have never once indicated we wanted to stop coming or it would be too hard, we have enjoyed going over there for Xmas eve every year for the past 14 years. In terms of family size they have two married kids and 3 (once bubs is born) grandchildren so not overwhelmingly big....
By all means if it's too much for them then bloody say so, but don't put it on us that it's for our benefit or it's what we want...
Plus not wanting to see us -their grand kids- over the Christmas period at all? Offering a ****y little lunch weeks away from Xmas in return- it doesn't make it any easier for us no matter what time of year it is! They live local too so travel has never been an issue, and I thought our catch ups should happen more often.
Not sure if this is MILs or SILs idea but we feel like we have been cut off and shut out . DH is devastated.