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    Default Helping your child sleep better

    The sleeping like a baby thread said we can start a new thread for parents who aren't ready to accept our children are destined to be bad sleepers, so here it is.

    This is a safe place for parents who are struggling with their children's sleep and they need them to be sleeping better, this is a non judgemental place for parents to discuss ideas on what might be able to help others, and of course vent too!

    As we know no two babies are the same and no two parents are the same, so what might work for some families may not work for others.

    Sleep training doesn't have to involve leaving a baby to protest cry, there are gentle methods of sleep training, some that do involve crying, some that don't, but it's about finding what works for your baby or toddler but something that also matches your parenting philosophy.

    You don't have to accept your child's bad sleep habits, you can try and change them (if you want to of course - not because your friends baby is sleeping better or you read a website or book that said they should be sleeping better - but because it's important to you and your family - you may not be functioning in the day, you may have other children to look after, your child may be cranky all day from lack of sleep etc etc) so come in this thread, being a safe place you can't be accused of being a bad parent for trying to 'change your child' or for 'treating them like robots'. It is not what sleep training is all about. It's about getting the best quality sleep for your child and therefore your entire family.

    Of course if you've tried everything under the sun and nothing is working, or you haven't tried everything but you want to accept you do have a child who just isn't going to sleep, that too is okay - it does happen, there are studies to prove this. And if this is the case, it's by no means your fault. You aren't a bad or lazy parent, but head on over to the 'sleeping like a baby' thread, there will be a whole heap of support there too, you can vent away and find strategies on how to happily accept your child's poor sleeping.

    Mods any chance this can be a sticky too and checked on as regularly as the other thread to ensure parents using this thread are also being supported, not criticised?

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    I'm after suggestions for a daytime sleep 'routine' for a 16 week old. He just catnaps at the moment, I try to put him down after about 2 hours of wakefulness or when I think he needs it but I also have an active 23 month old so bub sometimes gets slotted in around his brother. TIA.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BettyW View Post
    I'm after suggestions for a daytime sleep 'routine' for a 16 week old. He just catnaps at the moment, I try to put him down after about 2 hours of wakefulness or when I think he needs it but I also have an active 23 month old so bub sometimes gets slotted in around his brother. TIA.
    I find that my kids have catnapped it's because I've either put them down too soon or they've woken up hungry.

    2 hours awake would be my suggestion but if you've tried that, perhaps try 2 hours 15 minutes or perhaps try a top up feed before hand.

    Do you have any white noise in his room? Is it possible your eldest is waking him up when he transitions between sleep cycles?

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    Lovely thread! My DD was a terrible sleeper, day and night, til about 14 months. I had rocked her to sleep from birth and I think she just got used to it. Her dad left us very early on and honestly I just didn't have it in me to hear her cry or attempt any sort of 'sleep training'. So I was one case where environmental and lifestyle factors definitely contributed. We were between houses for a while, DD was suffering separation anxiety quite badly & most likely picking up on my anxiety By the time she was 12 months we were much more settled. She had dropped her day nap, which made her much more tired at bedtime, and she had started walking. I felt like her cries when I put her down were more 'protest' cries than distressed cries. She was old enough to figure out what was going on & protest going to sleep! So I gently started implementing some methods that felt right for me - after her bottle I would gently place her in her cot, say goodnight and leave the room. She'd cry but it felt so different. I had this feeling of, "no, she's ok. She can do this, I know it". I'd go back in after a while (never timed it or anything) and repeat the process - lie her back down, tell her goodnight and that it was time to go to sleep, and leave the room. Sometimes she needed a bit more comfort but I can't say she was ever distressed, I don't think I could have continued otherwise. By 14 months she totally got it and thrived on the routine. So, it was possible in my case to improve my child's sleep by tweaking her routine, and my own attitude, once our environment was secure. Just thought I'd share, I hope it helps someone!

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    @amcyus it sounds similar to what I did with my ds1 but he was a bit younger at 6 months. I agree that you can tell the difference between a cry that's just a protest versus a distressed one. I don't feel I damaged my child by letting him cry for short periods of time to teach him to self settle, babies cry for lots of reasons and sometimes you have to let them (for example I've got a 8 week old who has colic and sometimes I can't settle him so have to just let him cry it out for a few minutes until he wears himself out).
    I know every child is different and has different reasons for not sleeping well but in my case I realised after the sleep training worked so well that I actually didn't have a clue. I thought for months my baby was suffering from trapped wind, colic etc and he was waking so often due to this. But in fact he was just waking multiple times as this is perfectly normal, but getting frustrated at not being able to go back to sleep. Turned out to be such a simple problem to solve as he was sleeping through the night after 2 weeks.
    As much as I'm happy to accept that some babies are bad sleepers no matter what, I also agree with some here that parents don't always have to just accept that their child won't sleep as there are things that may improve the situation. I was waiting for my son to grow out of it and I'm sure if I hadn't done some sleep training he would have continued being an awful sleeper. Let's see how things go second time around!! I might be eating my words in a few months!

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    4 month sleep regression:

    Just wanted to post this article that has been linked in other threads.
    https://childsleepscience.wordpress....done-about-it/

    If bub all of a sudden starts waking more often around the 4 month mark it could be the 4 month sleep regression.

    Some things that may help:
    - put bub to bed where you intend bub to wake
    - try and put bub to bed drowsy but not asleep
    - don't automatically assume bub is waking because bub is hungry - try resettling first and see how that goes.

    It is possible to ride out the regression. The key is to not start any short term fixes that you are not
    wanting to continue (eg rocking to sleep). It only takes a couple of days to form a habit - but can take weeks to break one.

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    Default Helping your child sleep better

    Quote Originally Posted by BettyW View Post
    I'm after suggestions for a daytime sleep 'routine' for a 16 week old. He just catnaps at the moment, I try to put him down after about 2 hours of wakefulness or when I think he needs it but I also have an active 23 month old so bub sometimes gets slotted in around his brother. TIA.
    My first thought when I read your post is that 2 hours is too long awake for 16 weeks, I need to go back and check the book I used as a guide for awake times but I feel it was more like 90 mins at that age. My son has always been a child that sleeps worse if he's overtired, although he stays awake longer happily he will wake more frequently. I also found that he didn't consistently sleep past his 45 minute sleep cycle without help from me until he was older and on two days naps rather than three. The internet isn't working on my phone right now so I can't link, but if you google 'thebabysleepsite' they have a section for sample routines by age, info on things like the 4 month sleep regression and tips for better naps.
    Last edited by HollyGolightly81; 16-08-2015 at 17:10.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HollyGolightly81 View Post
    My first thought when I read your post is that 2 hours is too long awake for 16 weeks
    I thought the same, my daughter was usually 60-90 minutes max at that age. Maybe see if you can get him down a little sooner.

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    My daughter is 7 months and only just starting to be able to do 2 hours awake!

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