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  1. #151
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    This morning I found myself cracking open Gina Ford and knew I needed to come post here for some support before I fall into the rabbit hole of sleep fixes. Ds2 is only 5 weeks tomorrow and I'm finding the sleeplessness so hard to cope with right now, exacerbated by caring for a toddler this time around and being far away from any close friends and family for help and support. I'm feeling quite overwhelmed and hopeless, I had hoped I would feel more confident and laid back this time around, but I'm not. It's hard getting used to the round the clock feeding again and trying to remember it doesn't last forever. I can only get him to sleep during the day if I feed him to sleep and I find myself stressing about that, what 'rod' am I making for my own back when deep down I know at 5 weeks it doesn't matter. I'm desperate for him to take a dummy as I know that would at least give me a break with the feeding to sleep but so far he has no interest, they all seem to make him gag.

    Anyways... I just needed a vent. Talk some sense into me ladies and tell me it all doesn't matter, that there's light at the end of the tunnel. It doesn't matter what I do at 5 weeks old right? It doesn't mean I'll be haunted by bad sleep forever, right...?

  2. #152
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    AdornedWithCats is offline Winner 2013 - Spirit of BubHub Award
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    Repeat after me: "This too shall pass" "This too shall pass" "This too shall pass"

    You are not making a "rod" - do what you need to do as the mumma of your new baby. Back yourself. You can do this!

  3. #153
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    Quote Originally Posted by HollyGolightly81 View Post
    This morning I found myself cracking open Gina Ford and knew I needed to come post here for some support before I fall into the rabbit hole of sleep fixes. Ds2 is only 5 weeks tomorrow and I'm finding the sleeplessness so hard to cope with right now, exacerbated by caring for a toddler this time around and being far away from any close friends and family for help and support. I'm feeling quite overwhelmed and hopeless, I had hoped I would feel more confident and laid back this time around, but I'm not. It's hard getting used to the round the clock feeding again and trying to remember it doesn't last forever. I can only get him to sleep during the day if I feed him to sleep and I find myself stressing about that, what 'rod' am I making for my own back when deep down I know at 5 weeks it doesn't matter. I'm desperate for him to take a dummy as I know that would at least give me a break with the feeding to sleep but so far he has no interest, they all seem to make him gag.

    Anyways... I just needed a vent. Talk some sense into me ladies and tell me it all doesn't matter, that there's light at the end of the tunnel. It doesn't matter what I do at 5 weeks old right? It doesn't mean I'll be haunted by bad sleep forever, right...?
    You're a wonderful caring mother. It WILL pass. It's totally natural for babies to feed to sleep in the early stages and there's good reason for it. Give yourself a break and as my lc told me, allow yourself a glass of wine in the evenings - you deserve it!

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    Oh you poor love - I remember feeling exactly like this with my second. it's so overwhelming having a newborn and add a toddler on top of that?
    You are doing a great job and this will pass I promise. Just be kind to yourself - go into survival mode and just do the bare necessities and it will be okay xxx

  6. #155
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    hakuna matata is offline The artist formerly know as babyhopeful
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    Gosh I think I wrote the same post 8 weeks ago! Loves to feed to sleep, no dummy. Yep, yep! DD is now 13 weeks and sleep is already better. Not great, but better. It honestly improves, you're doing s great job x

  7. #156
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    Quote Originally Posted by HollyGolightly81 View Post
    This morning I found myself cracking open Gina Ford and knew I needed to come post here for some support before I fall into the rabbit hole of sleep fixes. Ds2 is only 5 weeks tomorrow and I'm finding the sleeplessness so hard to cope with right now, exacerbated by caring for a toddler this time around and being far away from any close friends and family for help and support. I'm feeling quite overwhelmed and hopeless, I had hoped I would feel more confident and laid back this time around, but I'm not. It's hard getting used to the round the clock feeding again and trying to remember it doesn't last forever. I can only get him to sleep during the day if I feed him to sleep and I find myself stressing about that, what 'rod' am I making for my own back when deep down I know at 5 weeks it doesn't matter. I'm desperate for him to take a dummy as I know that would at least give me a break with the feeding to sleep but so far he has no interest, they all seem to make him gag.

    Anyways... I just needed a vent. Talk some sense into me ladies and tell me it all doesn't matter, that there's light at the end of the tunnel. It doesn't matter what I do at 5 weeks old right? It doesn't mean I'll be haunted by bad sleep forever, right...?
    Holly, you had your baby! Congratulations. My DD is 8 weeks and we are in the newborn sleepless phase. It's so overwhelming isn't it? DD's sleep is getting worse too so we're off to Tresillian tomorrow.

    They told us at the hospital that a newborn takes three days to get into a habit. So that means three days to associate feeding with sleep (for example), and then three days to fix it. So even if it was a problem (which I don't think it is), it's easily fixed.

    At the moment DD needs to be rocked to sleep, then rocked continuously to stay asleep. DS1 spends half of every day watching tv because of it. I can't take it anymore!

  8. #157
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    Default Sleeping Like A Baby

    @HollyGolightly81 on reflection I was angry at myself for still getting obsessed with sleeping/worrying about sleeping/bad habits etc when I KNEW -and you KNOW- ultimately it gets better and all of this doesn't matter. I promised myself second time around it would be better because I knew it would pass and not to waste my little energy and time on things I couldn't control like sleep and routines with a newborn + toddler. But you can't help yourself. It's ok. It's normal. It's frustrating as **** to be consumed by it but my god you are not sleeping and it is so bloody hard. Obsess away. Google. Read gina ford and cry as you read how it works magically for others. Because all of us are doing the same.

    I don't need to tell you it gets better as you know that. I just want to tell you it sucks, you're normal, we all
    Google and feel overwhelmed and inadequate and do whatever you need to to survive this time as it's not forever and your kids will be ok xxxx

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  10. #158
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    Default Sleeping Like A Baby

    Quote Originally Posted by Little Miss Sunshine View Post
    @HollyGolightly81 on reflection I was angry at myself for still getting obsessed with sleeping/worrying about sleeping/bad habits etc when I KNEW -and you KNOW- ultimately it gets better and all of this doesn't matter. I promised myself second time around it would be better because I knew it would pass and not to waste my little energy and time on things I couldn't control like sleep and routines with a newborn + toddler. But you can't help yourself. It's ok. It's normal. It's frustrating as **** to be consumed by it but my god you are not sleeping and it is so bloody hard. Obsess away. Google. Read gina ford and cry as you read how it works magically for others. Because all of us are doing the same.

    I don't need to tell you it gets better as you know that. I just want to tell you it sucks, you're normal, we all
    Google and feel overwhelmed and inadequate and do whatever you need to to survive this time as it's not forever and your kids will be ok xxxx
    LMS, this is a brilliant post. I need to frame this and re-read it at regular intervals!
    And as an aside, congrats Holly! So thrilled to hear about the birth of your LO! (Although not so much the sleep issues)

  11. #159
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Miss Sunshine View Post
    @HollyGolightly81 on reflection I was angry at myself for still getting obsessed with sleeping/worrying about sleeping/bad habits etc when I KNEW -and you KNOW- ultimately it gets better and all of this doesn't matter. I promised myself second time around it would be better because I knew it would pass and not to waste my little energy and time on things I couldn't control like sleep and routines with a newborn + toddler. But you can't help yourself. It's ok. It's normal. It's frustrating as **** to be consumed by it but my god you are not sleeping and it is so bloody hard. Obsess away. Google. Read gina ford and cry as you read how it works magically for others. Because all of us are doing the same.

    I don't need to tell you it gets better as you know that. I just want to tell you it sucks, you're normal, we all
    Google and feel overwhelmed and inadequate and do whatever you need to to survive this time as it's not forever and your kids will be ok xxxx
    So true. So so true.

    After DS I declared I would not worry about sleep as much. Here I am stressing she should have fallen asleep 15 mins ago and SHE IS AWAKE AND OMG DISASTER.

    She isn't as bad as DS was but put a toddler in the mix and I get no down time or ability to day nap this time to catch up. She also does not sleep in cot/bassinet yet so I carry her everywhere.

    DD is now just shy of 12 weeks. Its so so hard but time just seems to keep ticking on. And just do what you need to get through.

  12. #160
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    I have to say, this time round I'm not too stressed about sleep in and of itself, but I am stressed about settling, particularly in public places.

    DD just fights sleep but she can't handle being awake for too long so if we get stuck out in public she starts screaming and I can't settle her. It's a particularly special scenario when DS1 is with me as well getting upset because DD is upset.


 

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