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  1. #131
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    I've had almost a year of pretty chronic sleep dep and I agree. I think we've become so parent-centred these days, that babies need to fit into rigid rules around us rather than us accommodating them. That they need to be fixed, trained so that it's easier for us. And I wonder if we are losing sight of why we have kids? They aren't just a trendy accessory to sit in the foreground while you keep going on with your life.

    And I'm not talking about those that are distressed by months and months of sleep dep. I'm talking about the parents who are planning their sleep training once the baby comes home and treat their kids like a puppy.

    I know that's probably going to get backlash.... but yeah it's what I see a lot lately.
    Yep. I do agree. Sleep deprivation is hard, very hard, I didn't sleep much at all the first 18 months and it was tough. I wanted my baby to sleep partially so I could run around at night and do chores, get other things done etc. if I just gave in and slept with him, fed him when he woke, he would sleep contently and go straight back to sleep after dream feeds. He was also a happy, cuddly baby by day, rarely cried. I often felt at the time I should have conformed and forced him into a routine he just baulked at but I'm so glad now that I didn't. I just had to give in and reassess what I could get done in a day. I never felt he needed to be "trained".

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    Rose&Aurelia&Hannah  (19-02-2016)

  3. #132
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    Quote Originally Posted by A-Squared View Post
    All of the go with the flow mummies here are making me jealous. I try to relax about my kids sleep (and every other aspect of motherhood) but I'm just too uptight! Haha. I'll get there one day.... Maybe!

    If anyone has any tips, please PM me so I don't derail any further
    I don't think there's anything easy about going with the flow, I just tried EVERYTHING with my DD, CC, CIO, tried so hard to get her to sleep on her own. She was seven when she got there!
    I just think sometimes the picture of what you think your life will be like when children are a certain age needs to change.
    All kids are different though and my youngest, premmie, co-sleeping baby has been the best. He still kicks you in the head though!

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    A-Squared  (19-02-2016)

  5. #133
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    Quote Originally Posted by A-Squared View Post
    All of the go with the flow mummies here are making me jealous. I try to relax about my kids sleep (and every other aspect of motherhood) but I'm just too uptight! Haha. I'll get there one day.... Maybe! 😳

    If anyone has any tips, please PM me so I don't derail any further 🙂
    I also didn't start out going with the flow! I was surrounded by mums with babies who were sleeping through, some from 6-8 weeks while I was waking sometimes hourly all night to my baby. I just had to give in and do what worked for him because nothing in the books/advice/guidelines did.

    "Put your baby down drowsy but awake". Ummm my baby had eyes that looked like he was on speed and unless he passed out in a coma on the boob, I've never ever seen him look drowsy.

    You will get there eventually.

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    A-Squared  (19-02-2016),amiracle4me  (20-02-2016),BettyV  (20-02-2016)

  7. #134
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    Quote Originally Posted by A-Squared View Post
    All of the go with the flow mummies here are making me jealous. I try to relax about my kids sleep (and every other aspect of motherhood) but I'm just too uptight! Haha. I'll get there one day.... Maybe! 😳

    If anyone has any tips, please PM me so I don't derail any further 🙂
    Personally I'm not a go with the flow person. I'm one of those super organized people that plans everything.

    I had to let that all go. Dd1 was a cluster feeder. 4-8pm every night from birth to 4-5mths. Otherwise she would scream. Dd2 was hospitalized at 5wks and in PICU. I had to reteach her how to boob feed.

    So I've compromised. Up-to 12 mths I will let my baby lead. Then I will coach/tweak if you will so bub is more in the family tune.

    For me - the stress and anxiety of baby crying is not worth anything.

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    A-Squared  (20-02-2016),GemJane  (20-02-2016),HollyGolightly81  (20-02-2016)

  9. #135
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    Hey ladies. I just want to jump in here and get your opinions because, well you're all awesome and have babies of similar ages.
    Is anyone else's bub struggling with shyness or clingy-ness when around others? A few times now ds has completely lost the plot when we have arrived at my in laws place and they have tried to cuddle him. To the point I had to take him to a quiet room and bf him (I'd just fed before we went so it wasn't hunger) and then he's been fine! Still shy and cautious but fine. Has also done this (not as bad) when I've gone to my sisters. So I was thinking it was when he was at other peoples house, which is fine. But then my mum was here and we went into his room to get him up from his nap, he was all smiles looking at me leaning over the crib, saw mums face, bam! Screaming. He's a funny little one in general, likes his own house and his bed. So maybe it's just a personality thing.
    Just curious to see if anyone else is noticing this. Hope it makes sense. I'm about to run out the door xx

  10. #136
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    My DS went through lots if separation anxiety phases as well as shy phases.

    Not sure how old your DS is but it is normal. I actually did not hand him around much etc when he was younger (I sound horrible but it hurt me seeing him distressed) - but now DS is almost 3 and a lot better.

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    GemJane  (21-02-2016)

  12. #137
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    I just read this thread from start to finish. I'm so glad there are people on here who feel the same about sleep as I do! My DD started off as a champion night time sleeper without me doing anything, but the last couple of weeks have been awful with the 4mo sleep regression hitting us hard! Going from 1-2 wake ups per night to four or five or sometimes more has been brutal! But I'm trying to just be consistent and hoping like hell its just a phase that will pass soon

    I'm not keen on sleep training but I do want to look more into cosleeping because I've noticed that when I bring DD into bed with me some mornings after particularly tough nights, she sleeps so much better. Her dodgy sleep seemed to coincide with us moving her into her cot in the nursery as she outgrew her bassinet and was starting to roll. So I'm not really sure if her waking now is the sleep regression or she notices that we aren't in the room with her or a combo of both or something else. I noticed lots of you ladies seem to cosleep, how do you do it? I'm not keen on her sleeping for the whole night in our bed as DH is a very heavy sleeper and I'm worried he would roll on her so I'm thinking about a cosleeper cot but the ones I've found online seem to only be bassinet sized? Are there any that are a bit bigger? Would love to hear how others do it.
    @GemJane my DD recently started being a bit the same with my family. It's been kind of good though because previously they would all descend on her like seagulls on a hot chip but now they hang back a bit and say hello one at a time while I hold her. So rather than everyone getting in her face and trying take her off me straight away they say hello one at a time, wait for her to be ready to smile at them, and then have a cuddle. She's much happier when she sees them now!

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    GemJane  (21-02-2016)

  14. #138
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    Thanks ladies who replied. I obviously have a bad case of mummy brain and sleep deprivation as I was actually supposed to write that post in my due in group! Haha! Far out! But thank you ! My ds is 16 weeks old. Xx

  15. #139
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    Reading this has been terrific therapy! My DS is 22 months old now - has had periods of being a terrific sleeper but at the moment is not. He has moved into a toddler bed and I was having tremendous trouble getting him to sleep. I insanely tried the super nanny method and he would get up at least 100 times. I had so much unwanted advice and just couldn't believe that shutting the door on him was the right way...if he is upset and needs me I go to him. I live in a rural area but found a phone sleep help line - a it has changed our lives. He still doesn't sleep through but I can get him to sleep in 30 minutes and he is happy and safe in his bed. He ends up in ours once or twice overnight - sometimes I put him back and sometimes I don't...but we're at peace - besides I get his snugly end in bed and my partner gets the kicky one!

  16. #140
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    I co sleep just ditched hubby and moved into a room with ds. Have friends who took side off cot and strapped it to bed to make room for all! Just have to prop it to right height


 

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