It 100% depends on dynamics in this situation. My step mum and Dad have actually seperated, but they had been married since i was 4, so she played a big part in my life. I always called her parenta grandma and grand dad. My mum and her actually get along quite well now that she and dad seperated 😅
I wouldnt consider giving her a 'grandma' name if she and dad had only been together for the last two years kind of thing.
I think the parents should consult with the grandparents to see if they can agree, but the final say should sit with the parents.
I think it should be up to the grand parents.
I went through this recently.
My only rules were that I didn't want to have 2 nans or anything.
So because my parents were Nana and Pa because of my niece and nephew they were always going to be the same.
My MIL wanted to be Nana and I said no.
I though it was disrespectful for my mum to then be called Nana Mae etc....
So she chose Gramma, I don't like it, but it's not my choice.
I secretly hope my kids grow up and call her Granny or something because I don't like her.
My DS calls my mum 'meemah' and my DH mum 'nanna' he calls his 2 step grandfathers 'Ben' (his name haha and 'g'dad'
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