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  1. #11
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    I totally get the inconvenience of it. Education is more than just reading and writing though. I assume the school production is a once a year (maybe twice?) affair? So even though its a bit of a PITA, its not like its every week. Putting in the effort to go is so valuable. IME, things like this really build school community. Its a great way for families to be involved, &a great opportunity for the students to shine,even if your DS isnt very into it. Has he actually said he doesnt want to do it, or are you assuming based on what he is like at home? If every other child is participating &it is a whole school event, he might feel a bit left out if he is the only one not joining in. The kids will all be talking about it, maybe incorporate it into their written language,etc. And he might be ok joining in if all the other kids are? I would talk to the teacher & tell her if he isnt too happy about joining in. She might be able to find another job for him or encourage him to give it a go. But if you really dont want to do it, just be honest &tell her its not foe your family.

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  3. #12
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    It's part of the curriculum. Standing up and being able to perform in front of peers. It's good to teach them some confidence. Also I don't think it'd be setting good example as then it's "oh I don't want to do that so I'll opt out'. You can't just "opt" out of Maths or Literacy either just because the child doesn't like the subject area.

    If my child didn't enjoy that I would ask them to get a minor role. In saying that I've just reread your post and realised it's a production that's happening outside of school hours. I would have him participate in the rehearsals but say you won't be bringing him to the main event.
    Last edited by Renesme; 27-07-2015 at 14:34.

  4. #13
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    How old is your child?

    My son was forced to be in a production even after he expressed that he did not want to. I told the school and we attended but I didn't want him to be on stage. I asked for a back stage role for him. He ended up so scared that he deficated his pants on stage.

    2 years on and he still hates being on stage for performing BUT he loves being the presenter and introducing people.

    I wish I just did not take him to the school performance when he was younger. In your case, I would just not take him on the night and give a white lie of "oh my baby was super clingy and vomited so we couldn't leave the house"

  5. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maxwell's Silver Hammer View Post
    How old is your child?

    My son was forced to be in a production even after he expressed that he did not want to. I told the school and we attended but I didn't want him to be on stage. I asked for a back stage role for him. He ended up so scared that he deficated his pants on stage. 8

    2 years on and he still hates being on stage for performing BUT he loves being the presenter and introducing people.

    I wish I just did not take him to the school performance when he was younger. In your case, I would just not take him on the night and give a white lie of "oh my baby was super clingy and vomited so we couldn't leave the house"
    Oh your poor DS.

    Whatwver you do, dont give some bullsh!t excuse,they will see right thougb it, lol. In my school, we had a family who didnt enjou participatinf in school productions, presentation nights,etc. EVERY SINGLE YEAR, they would ring 30 mins beforehand & all 3 of their kids had suddenly come down with gastro. In between leaving school at 3.30, &5.30 when they rang. & all 3 kids had made a miraculous recovery for school the next day. EVERY YEAR! It was really hard, because I would always have to give the kids from that family a role, knowing they probably wouldnt attend &I would need to have some kind of back up plan. It would have been so much better if they were honest from the start & just said they didnt want to come.

  6. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maxwell's Silver Hammer View Post
    How old is your child?

    My son was forced to be in a production even after he expressed that he did not want to. I told the school and we attended but I didn't want him to be on stage. I asked for a back stage role for him. He ended up so scared that he deficated his pants on stage.

    2 years on and he still hates being on stage for performing BUT he loves being the presenter and introducing people.

    I wish I just did not take him to the school performance when he was younger. In your case, I would just not take him on the night and give a white lie of "oh my baby was super clingy and vomited so we couldn't leave the house"
    Oh no, poor boy

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    How old is he?? My 5yo hates dance too and refused to participate in the practice/training but once he saw all the lights and set on stage he got so I to the actual performance that he won an award for best effort!! Could he possibly be the same??

    As an alternative view, when I was in year 6 we had to do a dance performance to Cats... I hated it, and mum just didn't make me go on the day. I haaaaaaaate dance!

    On a separate note, who the hell picks Frozen for a co-ed class???? Far out that was clever!!!

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  9. #17
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    He's only 6.
    I totally get the reasons behind them participating in these activities during school hours, but having got more details this afternoon it's going to be impossible to let him do the evening show.
    I have no problem with him doing the rehearsals and matinee performance, both are within his school hours.
    When it comes to a 6:15 drop off for a 7:30-9pm show, that's where we will have issues. I have a toddler and infant at home. Everyone is in bed at 7:30pm.
    I can't imagine how feral they'd be if they were out until 9pm and it's not even a weekend night, it's back to school for two more days afterwards.
    Then the school are looking for $20 a seat at the show, and the toddler MUST be seated, so $60 plus costume expenses. The costume isn't too bad, I just got him clothing he can wear again but I still had to buy when I wouldn't normally be buying long trousers and tops this late in the season.
    I'm going to take the advice given to me here and tell them the evening show doesn't suit us and that's just that.

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    It sounds like you've got a lot on your plate OP. I don't think it matters if you miss it this year. Try again next year. Families all have different commitments and values which impact extra curricular things like concerts. If it were me I'd give it a miss too. There's plenty more concerts to come which you can encourage him to be a part of.

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  12. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by misho View Post
    On a separate note, who the hell picks Frozen for a co-ed class???? Far out that was clever!!!
    That's what he's complaining about the most.
    He doesn't have a part, he's just a filler in the background but he has to be there (with the rest of the boys) for one of the girl's songs.
    I think he'd be OK on the day. I'm sure he'll just get stuck in.
    Unfortunately we just don't have anyone close by to rely on to babysit even if I could get away with the baby. And it's really not worth DH leaving work at 4:30pm to make it over. Buses are taking them to and from the rehearsals and matinee but parents have to provide the transport for the evening show.

    Quote Originally Posted by babyla View Post
    It sounds like you've got a lot on your plate OP. I don't think it matters if you miss it this year. Try again next year. Families all have different commitments and values which impact extra curricular things like concerts. If it were me I'd give it a miss too. There's plenty more concerts to come which you can encourage him to be a part of.
    Thank you.
    I found my stress levels creeping with this one but I don't feel so bad now others have said they'd just give it a miss this year.
    Maybe next year he'll actually like the theme they've chosen?

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    I think that because this one is in the evening its perfectly acceptable to tell the school he won't be able to attend on the night due to other commitments. You don't need to go into detail about what the other commitments are, that's private. Fact is, you have other commitments and can't make it.

    Assemblies etc that are done during school hours are different. That's part of school and all part of the experience. The out of hours ones are great, if you can attend, but there's bound to be the occasional family who cannot for various reasons and that's okay.

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