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  1. #1
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    Default To move in with MIL or not

    DH has been trying to persuade me to move in with his mom 75 years for 1 year in her house. She's currently living alone.
    DH and I always wanted to buy a new house. Bigger. But because we are self employeed, getting a loan has been difficult.
    So MIL came up with the idea saying that we should move in with her that way we can save some money (don't know how we suppose to save money) and sell our current house (which is mortgage free). And then wait for a year, when the market is better then we can get a bigger house. Or rent out or current house and save up the rent. So when going for a loan it shows we have steady rental, income as well as a business and property.
    And another advantage is that our current house has a caveat on it from MIL which she will remove when we get a new one.
    I really don't want to move in with her into her house. She's nice and reserved enough but she's also stubborn and babies my DD way too much. We have 3 kids and I can already see an authority issue happening.
    Eg DD is a fussy eater and she wouldn't eat dinner. So MIL would go and give her ice cream. I said no ice cream until she's had her dinner and MIL would continue to give it to her while saying you can't starve her, they put you in jail for it and it's only ice cream, if she won't eat anything else this would fatten her up.
    DH thinks I am being stupid if I don't want to do it.
    What would you do?

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    I wouldnt do it. I couldnt! Good luck deciding

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    I'm surprised your current house is mortgage free yet the banks won't give you the loan. are you not able to use that as security for a loan?

    what about remortgaging your current property to draw on the equity? use that towards your new house. the benefit of this is the interest becomes deductible against any rental income, thereby saving you in tax.

    you guys sound like you're in a decent enough position to obtain a loan. i'd be exploring my options a little more thoroughly first before moving in with mil.

    what's the caveat she has over your house? maybe this is what's prompting the banks to knock back your loan?

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    Sounds like a recipe for disaster.

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    Quote Originally Posted by turquoisecoast View Post
    I'm surprised your current house is mortgage free yet the banks won't give you the loan. are you not able to use that as security for a loan?

    what about remortgaging your current property to draw on the equity? use that towards your new house. the benefit of this is the interest becomes deductible against any rental income, thereby saving you in tax.

    you guys sound like you're in a decent enough position to obtain a loan. i'd be exploring my options a little more thoroughly first before moving in with mil.

    what's the caveat she has over your house? maybe this is what's prompting the banks to knock back your loan?
    This ^

    Your equity will be more than enough to get a loan for a new house. You wouldn't need mortgage insurance. And you could go a lo doc loan too if you don't both have full time jobs/regular income

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    The house has a caveat which means we can't borrow against it at all which makes our situation really difficult because if we need cash flow for a business we don't have a security to use.
    The caveat is set my MIL because when we initially bought the house she lend us the deposit. So she's put down her foot that unless she dies we can't use the house for borrowing purposes. Of cause unless she is willing to remove which we have had no luck after talking to her numerous times.

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    Can't do lo doc, not enough cash saved up for the deposit at the moment unfortunately unless we can use the house but we can't

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    Can you get legal advice about getting the caveat taken off the house? There sjould be ways to do it even if she doesn't agree - eg if you've paid her back the money you owe her, there shouldn't be any need for the caveat anymore.

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    Quote Originally Posted by tubster View Post
    The house has a caveat which means we can't borrow against it at all which makes our situation really difficult because if we need cash flow for a business we don't have a security to use.
    The caveat is set my MIL because when we initially bought the house she lend us the deposit. So she's put down her foot that unless she dies we can't use the house for borrowing purposes. Of cause unless she is willing to remove which we have had no luck after talking to her numerous times.
    Can you sell it? Can you speak to a lawyer and give her money back on sale of property?

    I wouldn't be moving in with her.

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    Your MIL sounds a bit controlling...you can't use your own house for equity...yikes. Can you get legal advice about this, as a PP said?

    MIL just moved in with us for a little while. I'm gritting my teeth & counting down until she finds a job & can get her own place. I'm really feeling the lack of privacy & my family can't visit overnight as there is no space anymore. We have the issue of her babying DD & 'forgetting' that she isn't the parent. DD's behaviour has gone downhill since & she tries to play us all off each other.

    If you do move in with her think hard about it & make sure everyone knows the ground rules from day dot.
    Good luck

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app


 

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