Just want to pop in and offer some hugs
I don't have much to add because I feel like you've already been given so much amazing advice from previous posters.
I can't believe the way this guy has been behaving. What he has done is appalling, but the way he's handling everything is much worse. Do what is best for you and the baby - he needs to understand that he has turned your world upside down in a devastating and gutless fashion, therefore he does not get to call the shots.
I hope there are people in his life (his family/friends) who are openly judging him on his poor form.