Closed Thread
Page 3 of 8 FirstFirst 12345 ... LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 75
  1. #21
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    3,493
    Thanks
    4,294
    Thanked
    1,806
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Do the children know you were planning on starting a family soon or would the news be out of the blue?

  2. #22
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    Sydney
    Posts
    2,845
    Thanks
    1,822
    Thanked
    1,423
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by Phony View Post
    Do the children know you were planning on starting a family soon or would the news be out of the blue?
    I just edited my previous reply to explain that yes they knew we would start trying soon... they've been asking for a sibling since we got engaged two years ago.

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to DT75 For This Useful Post:

    Phony  (07-07-2015)

  4. #23
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    3,493
    Thanks
    4,294
    Thanked
    1,806
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by DT75 View Post
    ETA: Also I work at the kids' school (and the kids knew we would be trying soon so are waiting), and have to let work know by 12 weeks. I don't want the kids finding out by someone approaching them asking how excited they are.
    Ahh, only saw this after I posted my question./
    So there will be a lot of excitement from them then
    I was just wondering what way it might go.
    Sounds lovely

  5. #24
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    Sydney
    Posts
    2,845
    Thanks
    1,822
    Thanked
    1,423
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by Phony View Post
    Ahh, only saw this after I posted my question./
    So there will be a lot of excitement from them then
    I was just wondering what way it might go.
    Sounds lovely
    Yeah we are excited.
    After our 8 week scan, I am buying a tshirt for each of them- one saying "Big Sister to be AGAIN March 2016" and the other "Big Brother to be FINALLY March 2016"

  6. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to DT75 For This Useful Post:

    BH-KatiesMum  (07-07-2015),btmacxxx  (07-07-2015),Phony  (08-07-2015),sarah1502  (08-07-2015)

  7. #25
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    12,714
    Thanks
    9,561
    Thanked
    12,691
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 9/1/15Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 7/11/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 3/10/14100 Posts in a week
    If it were me I would tell my hubby to tell the step kids bio mum. I don't think the reasons provided are sufficient to let your DH dodge that responsibility. I would have hubby tell her while the kids are in your care and just before you tell the kids. Preferably via phone as I just think that be a sign if respect but email is ok if your hubby thinks things will go pear shaped. Yes your hubby needs to tell her but he doesn't owe it to her to provide a significant advanced warning.

  8. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to VicPark For This Useful Post:

    Chillies  (07-07-2015),delirium  (08-07-2015),HappyBovinexx  (07-07-2015),Phony  (08-07-2015)

  9. #26
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    4,222
    Thanks
    894
    Thanked
    3,219
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Whatever the method, I think your DH should tell her. I would be really really put out if my XH's girlfriend told me she was pregnant. And in your case with the mum having had issues TTC, it could seem like shoving it in her face, that you can get pregnant while she had trouble (not saying you did or didn't have trouble, but she wouldn't necessarily know that).

  10. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to CMF For This Useful Post:

    HappyBovinexx  (07-07-2015),My Beloved Ones  (07-07-2015),VicPark  (07-07-2015)

  11. #27
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    1,403
    Thanks
    93
    Thanked
    387
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Definitely a well worded email, if all communication is through email anyway and only emergencies are on phone.
    I think you're being very kind to her considering her feelings and including the step children hopefully she'll see that

  12. #28
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    1,740
    Thanks
    140
    Thanked
    455
    Reviews
    8
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Awards:
    Bubhub Blogger
    The only thing that worries me is using her work email, if she might get upset I don't think work is an appropriate place to be. Can you contact her via a personal email address?

  13. The Following User Says Thank You to Hamilicious For This Useful Post:

    VicPark  (08-07-2015)

  14. #29
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Posts
    439
    Thanks
    108
    Thanked
    230
    Reviews
    0

    Default Telling the Bio mother

    I have just been in your situation except that I was 13w. Bio mum knew that we wanted kids and were planning them soon. She had told me her new partner desperately wanted a child with her but that would be impossible due to a hysterectomy after her third child (with a different dad). She also was adamant she did not want ANY more children.

    I honestly don't think that it will make any difference to your bio mum how or when she finds out, I still couldn't imagine her taking it well given her history to have children herself. Any way it's put its going to feel like a kick in the guts.

    I do definitely think it is DH responsibility if you do want to though. To be honest we actually told the kids when I couldn't hide it anymore and then they told their friends and bio mum found out through a school mum. I don't think it would have made any difference to her reaction whatsoever though and instead it protected me from the onslaught that followed, during a time when I had major pregnancy hormones.

    I think you need to prepare yourself for the worst and then nothing that happens better will be a bonus!

  15. #30
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Victoria
    Posts
    1,868
    Thanks
    3,216
    Thanked
    1,513
    Reviews
    4
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by DT75 View Post
    Yeah we are excited.
    After our 8 week scan, I am buying a tshirt for each of them- one saying "Big Sister to be AGAIN March 2016" and the other "Big Brother to be FINALLY March 2016"
    First, congrats on your pregnancy!

    I share others views that I think it might be better coming from your DH, either in the form of an email or simple letter.

    I also wondered about the wording on DSS's tshirt - would saying "FINALLY" be a bit much for the ex do you think? If she's going to have a bad reaction I can see how that might also set her off. Or maybe just leave the tshirts for wearing at your place?

  16. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to MsViking For This Useful Post:

    Chillies  (08-07-2015),Phony  (08-07-2015),VicPark  (08-07-2015),Wise Enough  (08-07-2015)


 

Similar Threads

  1. I don't like what my new fitbit is telling me....
    By Zabella in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 14-09-2014, 21:27
  2. Telling boss u r pregnant
    By Kelbel29 in forum Maternity & Parental Leave
    Replies: 37
    Last Post: 10-07-2014, 09:30
  3. Telling work
    By MrsKK in forum Pregnancy & Birth General Chat
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 09-07-2014, 16:03

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Pebblebee
Parents spend hours looking for things they need NOW. The keys, the remote, darling daughter's treasured teddy. Stop wasting precious time looking & start finding with Bub Hub reviewed Pebblebee Smart Tag. Simply attach a Pebblebee and find it fast.
sales & new stuffsee all
CarmelsBeautySecrets
Growing your own natural nails is easy. Years ago, I devised a simple and very effective technique which really helps boosts the nails' growth in as little as three days! And most importantly keeps them that way.
featured supporter
TPS Health Physiotherapy and Pilates
TPS Health Physiotherapy and Pilates has three clinics located at Morningside, Redlands and Lutwyche. We offer pre and post natal services as well as physiotherapy and Pilates. All clinics offer child minding services so bubs are always welcome!
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!