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  1. #1
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    Default 2yo only wants daddy

    I'm so upset I'm crying over it right now. Stupid mummy feelings.

    I had a terrible night with the newborn so this morning DH gets up to tend to DS.
    Since newborn stays unsettled all morning, I hear and get glimpses of what's going on in the living room.

    DS has been stuck on the IPad for 45min, not impressed so I call him in so we can read stories.
    There I realised he has a dirty nappy and I overheard DH telling DS he needed to change his nappy over an hour ago.
    Again not impressed with DH parenting skills. Leaving your kid in a dirty nappy and alone with the iPad for one hour?!
    Since newborn doesn't sleep anyway, and I'm now upset for DS in top of overly tired I decide to get up and take DS somewhere.

    To all my suggestions (park, zoo, library, ...) he says "no with mummy. Go with daddy" 😐
    Then DH proceeds to yell at DS for something trivial cue huge breakdown for DS and again he doesn't want any cuddles from me, but crying for DH.

    I feel so rejected and useless for both my kids.

    No point to this thread just a vent I guess.

  2. #2
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    I couldn't go past this thread and not say anything.

    Firstly, DH needs to get it together and change a nappy the MOMENT it needs changing. How would DH like to walk around with soiled underwear for an hour? That's completely lazy and unacceptable.

    Secondly, I know it's hard not to not take it to heart but children have motives we can't understand. One day DP and I went to pick DD (1yo) up from daycare after DP had dropped her off that morning. DD only wanted DP and screamed for her when I held her. I went home and cried. I was devastated. The next day I dropped her off and she only wanted me. That's when we realised that she thought the person who was dropping her off was mad/ upset with her and she was trying to get cuddles because she thought they didn't want her! DD goes through stages of who she wants.

    It's quite possible DS is interested in DH only because he thinks he can play the iPad more, doesn't see DH as often because of work maybe or is in a 'daddy' mood.

    It hurts bad. I know. But then I need to tell myself it's not a competition between me and DP and I need to celebrate their love too as something special and unique.

    I'm so sorry you're feeling like this today OP. A trip to the park with your littlies is probably exactly what you need.

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    harvs is offline Winner 2014 - Spirit of BubHub Award
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    Big hugs EMF. I know how you feel. It's not personal.

    I hope your day picks up x

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    ExcuseMyFrench  (01-07-2015)

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    Subbing to come back and respond later.

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    Yep. Same here with 10yo dd1. Dd2 (3yo) won't leave me alone and dd1 won't have anything to do with me unless I'm buying something for her and even then I didn't buy her enough or do enough for her etc..

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    ExcuseMyFrench  (01-07-2015)

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    DS1 did the same thing when DS1 was born.

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    ExcuseMyFrench  (01-07-2015)

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    If I left my DS with my husband and I found out he'd spent an hour sitting in a dirty nappy playing on the iPad I'd be having a very strongly worded discussion with my husband. That is awful, why on Earth would he have just not changed your son's nappy? If it's a smelly one they're a bit hard to forget about, although I guess it's possible since he wasn't actually interacting with his child

    Anyway I wouldn't worry too much about the dad preference. They change their mind all the time about who the favourite is and it can be for trivial reasons (he probably likes dad better because dad just lets him have the ipad).

    Definitely try to get out of the house with the kids if you're feeling crappy, fresh air really does help and I'm sure once you're out having fun your DS won't mind that he's with you instead of Daddy. Although, maybe Daddy needs to get out too? Why not all go out as a family?

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    ExcuseMyFrench  (01-07-2015)

  14. #8
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    almai is offline "you never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have."
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    Big hugs xx

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    Thank you so much for your kind words and hugs, it did make a lot of difference to my outlook on the day.

    Not long after I posted this thread, DH and DS came back from the park with DS in full tantrum this time calling after me. DH was just too happy to take over cuddling the newborn and I was too happy being called by a tantrumy toddler...

    We then managed to have a great quality time just the two of us, lots of cuddles, play at the park.
    We even managed to make two new friends while at the park when meeting our new neighbours. A mum and her toddler girl that goes to the same childcare than DS. It was lovely.

    Couldn't believe how the day could turn around for the best so quickly

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    I'm so glad it's all turned around. Xx


 

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