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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cicho View Post
    I don't agree with actully using the soap or tobasco, but threaten to use it.

    There is an entire generation who have no respect for authority, or anyone for that matter. A bite of soap might be enough to change their tune.

    Try telling all the grown ups who had this punishment dished out to them and as a consequence are respobsible, well rounded adults.

    Being fed soap for having a foul mouth is not abuse. It is a consequence.
    Really? An entire generation?

    It's funny how the earlier generations always complain about the younger ones having no respect for authority. Kids go through phases. Some misbehave. It doesn't make it okay to stick soap or Tobasco in their mouths. I'm sure all the qualified professionals who are against physical punishment and the studies done showing the negative effects are all codswollop. Because people have their own anecdotes that prove it's harmless, because THEY weren't effected by it.

    And what about the people that WERE effected by it? Why aren't you mentioning them? The older generations are FAR from perfect. I know people who were hit as kids. All they learnt was how to hide their bad behavior better. They never learnt WHY they shouldn't do certain things. Fear through physical punishment is not the answer to disciplining kids. That's how you push them away.
    Last edited by hopeful1986; 26-06-2015 at 11:42.

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  3. #22
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    How about a family swear jar? They're only young so they probably don't have money to contribute, but maybe it could be changed to 10min of cleaning time or losing 10mins of screen time or something like that?
    They'd be more likely to take it seriously if they see you doing it as well.

  4. #23
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    It might not be abuse but it is feral.
    Never heard of that before moving to Australia.

    Why would a parent choose this punishment when there are other ways to deal with it that are more effective and respectful of your kid is beyond me.

  5. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cicho View Post

    Being fed soap for having a foul mouth is not abuse. It is a consequence.
    Actually, it is abuse. Forcing your children to eat a chemical ridden, non food substance because they swore is ridiculous.

    The swear jar is a great idea. If they don't get pocket money, maybe you could write things on tokens (e.g. Lights off by 8 / no phone for 24 hours etc) and get them to pick a punishment instead.

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  7. #25
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    Sorry, it is abuse.
    DSS had his mother force him to put soap in his mouth when he swore. He told a teacher at school, and DOCS were called in. She got a serious talking to, a report was written, and they checked in every other week for months.

    What worked for us was me sitting DSS down and saying how sad it makes us. And that we would have to tell grandma he was acting this way. He adores his grandmother, and knew what he was doing was wrong, so it freaked him out.
    Following through on that (telling grandma) showed him that we were serious.

    He never cursed in our house, just his mother's. It stopped after we had a conversation including grandma. That was a year ago now.

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  9. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sookie Stackedhouse View Post
    I know it's bad but she only had to do it once with me. My older sister got it a few more times as it was a habit she had to break.

    I'm not saying that it is a good idea for long term use. And it is old school. But it worked on us. I don't remember it burning or hurting. Just the bad taste for an hour or 2.
    You could bring back the cane and use a belt to beat them with too

    Seriously?


    OP I'm going to assume the humiliation, physical force and yes dangerous abuse of forcing a child to consume TOXIC chemicals in soap and heat of Tabasco is a joke and you won't take that advice and lead by example, give consequences ( like grounding or taking away privileges )

    The fact they are walking the streets , swearing at you and swearing so much is a huge concern - how long have they been this way and maybe they don't take you seriously and you need to be more consistent?

    When my niece swore at my sister ( at 9) she took away her iPad for a week and she's never done it again

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  11. #27
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    OP, do your kids receive pocket money?

    Perhaps you could make up a chart where they start the week with $10, and if they swear you deduct money? Perhaps the first offence they lose $5, if they swear a second time take $3, then if they dare to swear a 3rd time deduct the remaining $2.

    There needs to be consequences every time they offend. They will soon learn to be more careful if they know there's going to be some form of punishment involved.

    Alternatively there could be a reward on offer at the end of each week if they have a 'swear free' week, like an outing to a movie they really want to see. If one of them swears, cancel your plans and stick with it.

    Good luck

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  13. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cicho View Post
    Being fed soap for having a foul mouth is not abuse. It is a consequence.
    By that logic, if I swear at my husband when he's being a d***head and he force feeds me soap, that's just a consequence of my behaviour and not my husband abusing me. Or does it not count as abuse when you do it to a child?
    Do you honestly not realise how ridiculous your statement is?

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  15. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by DarcyJ View Post
    By that logic, if I swear at my husband when he's being a d***head and he force feeds me soap, that's just a consequence of my behaviour and not my husband abusing me. Or does it not count as abuse when you do it to a child?
    Do you honestly not realise how ridiculous your statement is?
    That's exactly what I'm thinking.

    It's amazing what some people feel comfortable doing to their kids but would never dream doing to an adult.
    Quite sad really 😓

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  17. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by DarcyJ View Post
    By that logic, if I swear at my husband when he's being a d***head and he force feeds me soap, that's just a consequence of my behaviour and not my husband abusing me. Or does it not count as abuse when you do it to a child?
    Do you honestly not realise how ridiculous your statement is?
    Amen sister.


 

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