I understand separation anxiety as my eldest had/has it badly. Even now at 5yo she gets anxious when she knows daddy has to go away. Cue nightmares and diarrhoea.
The way we dealt with it was bedsharing. But if she stuffed around she went straight back to her cot. It only took 3-5 days for her to work out she could stay with us if she slept. That's when the ridiculous 40min wake ups stopped to two overnight feeds.
I'm not trying to push my agenda on you at all. But I truly understand. I was back at work when this was happening and it was hard. Even now my dd1 gets upset when dh or I suddenly disappear. We have to talk about us leaving all the time, chat when we will get back etc.
wifey of hubby who is always away. mother of two girls who are always amusing.