Oh @Jem70 I'm so very sorry to hear of your loss. Why does this 'journey' have to be so heart breaking. I'm sending you huge supportive hugs.
@Kelly70 I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. Geez life sucks sometimes, so unfair at any time for this to happen but even more so as you have been through so much already with your bro. I hope you're all doing ok.
@Jem70 sooo very sorry to read your news. I hope you and your partner are holding up ok.
Thanks everyone for the lovely messages of support. I know many of you have been through this. I wish it wasn't a club we had to join. It's been an emotional few days but I have to trust nature knows best. X
But also, nature/God/the universe is an a$$hole sometimes and it's ok to be really angry.
Hi lovely ladies
I haven't been active on this group for a long time as we were diagnosed with a partial da alpha gene match after being on the IVF journey from almost 8 years, having n number of IVF cycles, producing normal blasts and 2 miscarriages. I was very sad and angry about all this, as to why no doctor was able to diagnose it earlier. I got a little courage today , so I thought I will share my story as it was getting very hard fighting it all alone. I am sorry for the long post, but I need to share my feelings
We were always considered unexplained infertility. Our first cycle was with mivf which resulted in 2 pregnancies , both of which resulted in miscarriages due to random chromosomal abnormalities. Did more cycles there and did pgd , but no success.
We moved to Monash ( LB) , who advised to take my embryos to blastocysts unlike mivf as I had a lot of eggs and embryos , but she wanted to choose the best ones.
So we made 4 blastocysts from 2 cycles and sent them for pgd. 2 were absolutely normal and 2 came out as inconclusive result. We were very happy and hopeful that we had made normal pgd tested blasts as we thought making normal blastocysts was our only hurdle. Did 4 fet with these blasts and always had a neg result. We decided to do another fresh cycle as I thought I would bank embryos due to my age ( I am 38) we made 2 blasts which are still frozen and we didn't do pgd on them.
In the meanwhile, when nothing was working for us, lovelies like blondeinbrisvegas and lilypily suggested that we should consult dr M in Sydney and also see dr Wazza in Queensland. I did that and dr M found out we have high natural killer cells (17) and there was no point transferring those 2 embies without a immune protocol. We sent the results to LBs office but have never heard back. I have nothing against her as she made normal blasts for us and sure is a very competent doctor, but after 4 failed attempts, she lost interest, gave up on us and said that I think the cosmic forces need to work for you . So we decided it's time to change docs. We saw dr NL at Monash and took dr M's findings with us. He did more tests on us and found out that we have partial da alpha match , that's why it's raised your natural killer cells and implantation is not happening and will not happen unless treated.( at least some one in 8 years provided with a reason other than egg quality)
Now he gave us choices, he said we can either do the very aggressive immune protocol consisting of intralipids, LIT, ivig etc, go for a donor sperm( which we don't want to) or arrange a gestational surrogate who can carry your baby ( with my eggs and DH sperm). I also had a brain surgery between these ivfs for the removal of a benign cyst. Thankfully it was not cancerous , but it left me with a lot of weaknesses in my body. Looking at my medical history, he suggested that the safest Option with the best success rates will be gestational surrogacy.
We were shocked with the findings. We wasted 8 years in transferring embryos which never had a high chance of implanting and no one tried to check why. Now we are searching on surrogacy options. Commercial surrogacy is illegal here In Aus.. But can be done overseas. The cheapest option is India ( which is still very expensive) . It's abt 30000 dollars plus airfares etc. we are planning to do another cycle here , collect some more embies, have them pgd tests and send them overseas for gestational surrogacy. We are flying down to qld to see Wazza on the 3rd of November to seek his opinion. I mean I don't know what direction life is heading to, what's right or not
I am again sorry for the very long post and thank you for reading it. There is no one else who can understand all this. From the bottom of my heart, I want to congratulate everyone who has achieved their long awaited bfp, very sorry for the ones who have had losses or a bfn, hoping you get the courage sooner than later to try gain and wishing all the best to all those lovelies who are still ttc like me.
Last edited by BH-tech; 02-11-2015 at 10:18. Reason: Link Removal
@Sue77 OMG Luv!!! What an terrible bloody ordeal you and DH have been through!!! I'm just so sorry for all the time, $ and heartache it's taken to get to this point!! It's just BS and so terribly unfair to have had to be put through the absolute wringer for years on end to find an answer and a solution!!! I feel so angry on both of your behalf, I really do!!
I am glad to see that you finally have found the answers as to "why" and that these issues can be overcome I was saddened to hear of the brain surgery Luv..how terribly frightening for you it must've been at the time Thank God it wasn't cancerous!!!!
I feel sad though that you can't do the aggressive protocol yourself and have to go down the path of surrogacy. I bloody wish I was young enough to offer to help you with it as God knows you deserve to be given this opportunity asap!!! Is there no family/friends that can/will offer to help you both?? I will send out prayers to the Universe that you find someone as fast as possible
Good luck seeing Wazza for your appointment too!!! I hope he can help in some way or at least confirm what Dr M/Dr L have told you which will then give you a definite direction to move in. Please don't apologise for your post!!! I've been thinking of you and am just so happy you've taken the time to come to the thread and update us all on what's been going on.
You really are such a strong woman Luv and I admire you greatly for the guts and determination you've shown and are showing in never giving up or giving in on this journey. Your DH is to be commended also as it's most certainly a team effort and I'm sure you've both become a stronger couple as a result of all of this
I'm sending prayers to the Universe that you'll both receive your take home baby as soon as you possibly can!!!
Please keep in touch when you're able to let us know how you're going. You know that we're all here for you to help and support you too xoxoxo
Last edited by missybear; 15-10-2015 at 15:05.
Pregnant for the first-time?
Not sure where to start? We can help!
Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!