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  1. #21
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    It's not an old fashioned name though. That's just the excuse he's using because I continue to question why.. It has always been 'I just don't like it' and completely shuts me off without suggesting serious names.

    His suggestions are always stupid like rattling off any name that rhymes.. E.g Layla, Ayla, Kayla for a girl.

    I'm unsure how I'm being unfair if he isn't going to take it seriously and I have a name that I absolutely love and I know I'm not going to find a replacement that I feel the same about. Yet I'm supposed to negotiate with him, who clearly doesn't give a sh#t? If he presented a name that he felt so strongly about, I would consider it.

    But until he steps up and actually suggests a name that isn't a joke. I don't think I'll be budging.

  2. #22
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    I should have added that he needs to come up with names. It's not fair for you to do all of the thinking. Tell him that if he doesn't come up with some good ideas bub will be called the name he doesn't like

  3. #23
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    I'm also dying to know the name!

    I wouldn't no, because personally I think I don't think I could completely love a name knowing my DP hated it. I also love lots of names so think I'd be able to find an alternative we were both happy with.

    IMO however, if he really hated it and couldn't bear his DS/DD having that name - knowing how much you love it, you'd think he'd come up with some other suggestions! So I understand why this is super frustrating for you.I do agree with PP too, in that I have a few names I just can't stand and I can't even explain why I hate them. E.g. One is Marnie, I can't explain why I hate it - I just do. So I do think his 'reason' or lack thereof is fair enough...

    Maybe you could agree on another name you both really like, and when you meet bub, if you're still set on the name he hates you can bring it up again?

    Does it have a nice origin or meaningful meaning that you could use to convince him? Anyone famous with the name that might make him change his view on it?I have a name picked out for my daughter (one day) that I'm sure will never change. I ADORE it. My boyfriend HATED it, until I mentioned I'd call her (nickname) for short, and now he loves it too.I do think babies grow into their names and am sure you will end up loving bub and their name no matter what it is!
    Last edited by CodieBloom; 15-06-2015 at 20:23.

  4. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by bigmummahen View Post
    It's not an old fashioned name though. That's just the excuse he's using because I continue to question why.. It has always been 'I just don't like it' and completely shuts me off without suggesting serious names.

    His suggestions are always stupid like rattling off any name that rhymes.. E.g Layla, Ayla, Kayla for a girl.

    I'm unsure how I'm being unfair if he isn't going to take it seriously and I have a name that I absolutely love and I know I'm not going to find a replacement that I feel the same about. Yet I'm supposed to negotiate with him, who clearly doesn't give a sh#t? If he presented a name that he felt so strongly about, I would consider it.

    But until he steps up and actually suggests a name that isn't a joke. I don't think I'll be budging.
    Maybe he's saying it's old fashioned as a reason because he feels like he needs to give something more than "I don't like it", even though that in itself is a perfectly valid reason.
    Does he genuinely not care about naming this child? If not, then it seems odd that he's so against the name. Just because he hasn't got a name he loves as much as you do, doesn't mean he should settle for one he hates. Think of a name you hate; what if he suggests that as one he genuinely really likes, will you use it? There's no way to measure who loves something more in this situation. You want him to compromise which is fair enough, but compromise goes both ways.

    You might not find another name that you love as much, but if you approach any discussion with him thinking that nothing he suggests is going to be good enough then a) it probably won't and b) he'll probably figure there's little point in giving any suggestions.

    I'm not trying to antagonize or upset you, I'm trying to see it from his point of view, assuming he's a regular guy who is interested in this baby and loves you and the baby.

    Do you know the sex of the baby?

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  6. #25
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    I wouldn't do it but I would also want naming to be collaborative so he'd hsve to put forward some suggestions he loved.

    I don't think you really need a valid reason to like a name either, you can just not like it.

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  8. #26
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    The validity of his opinion doesn't really concern me, I was just answering a previous posters question.

    Obviously he's entitled to just not like a name, but he needs to start suggesting names that he does actually like, considering mine aren't an option.

    He is also the kind of person who is dead set against anything I say, then turns around after it's all said and done and says I was right and that he should have done what I said. If he does that with this I will be absolutely furious and I don't think I'll ever get over it.

    Yes I know my husbands personality, hence why I think it's worth the fight.

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  10. #27
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    Fair call. Anyway, you asked for experiences, I've given you my friend's (albeit second hand), not opinions on what our thoughts are about your situation. I've deviated from your OP. Good luck, hope he starts giving you more options to work with.

  11. #28
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    I LOVED Savannah my hubby hated it. We went back to drawing board and have a beautiful name for our Dd. I couldn't think of her being named anything else!

  12. #29
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    No way, I wouldn't even consider it, I think it would be horribly disrespectful to your husband. It's his baby too!

    My exH and I had completely opposite taste in names. As a result, my 1st and 2nd children have names that I *like* and he *likes*, and for our third we both happened to stumble across a name that we both love. Wasn't our first (or second third etc) choice, but we love it all the same.

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  14. #30
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    No, we both had the power of veto with names. My DH wasn't great with coming up with ideas either which was frustrating. I came up with a shortlist of ten names, DH veto'd some outright, named his top three and we went from there.


 

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