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  1. #11
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    Default Comfort/stress/binge eating

    Quote Originally Posted by MrsA2B View Post
    Oh @KiWolf, five years ago I could have written your post, word for word (excluding the bits about kids! ).

    It is sooooooooo common. So much more common than you would think, and kudos for being brave enough to post, it's clearly letting other people share about it too!

    For many years (literally since I was 12 years old), I tried to 'control' my eating and lose weight and would go into a binge/diet cycle. I would lose 20kg, gain 20kg.... And so on and so on. I too felt like a drug addict, it's such a horrible feeling. I remember about 8 years ago, sitting on my couch at home, waiting for my housemate to go to sleep so I could binge and getting so edgy because she wouldn't leave!

    What I've learned is that this isn't an issue that can be fixed by losing weight or just 'controlling' yourself.

    For me, what worked was a combination of mindfulness, a concept called intuitive eating - where you stop restricting food groups in that all or nothing diet mentality (there are some awesome books on the subject by Geneen Roth that I would strongly recommend) and spending some time with a psychologist to figure out why I did this to myself and what drove the behaviour.

    In the last few years, I can count on less than one hand the times that I've had a binge in the way I used to. I still eat junk sometimes, but in normal portions and with other people around me - it's so freeing! I remember back in the day wondering if I could ever just eat 1 chocolate bar and enjoy it, rather than eating 3 in secret and hating myself, or not eating any for 6 months (like I did once!).

    Even though it's not about the weight, for what it's worth, I'm still a little overweight, but my weight doesn't fluctuate anymore - so I've been losing weight slowly over the last year (before I was pregnant) quite easily and without feeling deprived - and this time it staying off! Also - I don't hate my body anymore, even when I am technically overweight... It's such a nice feeling!

    Sorry for the epic novel post, but I hope it helped a bit. Please feel free to PM if you want any other info! Good luck xx
    This is so fantastic to read!!

    First of all- huge congrats on beating it! You give me so much hope and inspiration to keep fighting-

    I'll have a look for these Geneen Roth books now- I think it'd be worth the read, and for the first time I'm planning to tackle this with a psychologist as well- rather than just trying to figure it out on my own- it clearly goes well beyond just eating wrong or eating right.

    Yesterday I had a day that I can only describe as "good" for me anyway

    I had:

    2 pikelets with honey and marg
    1 slice of toast and vegemite with tea (at my mums)

    A devilled ham and salad sandwhich on wholemeal bread

    A coffee and celery stick with peanut butter

    Chicken stir fry (home made) with vegetables rice, avocado oil, soy garlic and sweet soy.


    But then I went on after stressful moments with kids to scoff a choc honeycomb Meusli bar-

    Then in the middle of the night after a few wake ups I binge ate a banana, half an avocado, a tablespoon of peanut butter and something else I can't quite remember??

    This is a good day for me...

  2. #12
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    And you're so right- it's not about the weight - I mean sure it's nice to feel good about yourself and fit into smaller clothes, but in reality the Heath (both physical and mental) is what really bothers me about this behaviour. The body image can come later In the gym and/or through the results of fixing things- but mostly I want to address the issue so I don't have a heart attack/stroke in my 40's and so I can feel better- eating too much and the wrong things really does make your body feel sick and sluggish- and the opposite is way too extreme, making me miserable and feeling like I'm starving and tunnel visioned/obsessed with exercise.

  3. #13
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    Yes. This is the opening post on a thread I started in august 2011.
    Here I am, still 20kg overweight, still bingeing.

    "As a weight watchers member of 13 weeks who absolutely hates my body, has a DH who'd like me to weigh 30kg less, and has very low energy levels and low self esteem, I keep trying to stick to the program but I find I feel fantastic when I binge eat! I have energy, I can think clearly, I want to socialise, and I feel motivated and creative. Why dies the price for thus have to be all the above issues? Surely there is a middle ground somewhere? Who else loves binge eating, does it in secret, and thinks they might not be able to stop, ever?"

  4. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by made2bAmummy View Post
    Yes. This is the opening post on a thread I started in august 2011.
    Here I am, still 20kg overweight, still bingeing.

    "As a weight watchers member of 13 weeks who absolutely hates my body, has a DH who'd like me to weigh 30kg less, and has very low energy levels and low self esteem, I keep trying to stick to the program but I find I feel fantastic when I binge eat! I have energy, I can think clearly, I want to socialise, and I feel motivated and creative. Why dies the price for thus have to be all the above issues? Surely there is a middle ground somewhere? Who else loves binge eating, does it in secret, and thinks they might not be able to stop, ever?"
    How have things gone for you since then?

  5. #15
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    F.

    I am a compulsive eater. I don't really like sweets and chips but I serve too much in meals eg too much breakfast lunch etc..

    I'm 40kgs overweight now since pregnancy 😟. (And before hand) I've done shrink thing and now I'm turning to WLS. I don't see another way out

  6. #16
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    Hi Monnie,

    Big hugs Hun- I feel a complete loss of control too- I hope WLS brings you the answer you need.

    The power it takes on you is not something I think can be explained to someone who doesn't have it (or some sort of real addiction)

  7. #17
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    Thanks for asking @KiWolf, very little has changed in my eating behaviours since that thread in 2011 which is why I wanted to refer to it, to highlight that I feel controlled by food and that it's a long term issue for me.

    I do have some triggers which I am very aware of, but am many times unable to remedy.

    Tiredness is my first trigger for binge eating. I have three children, one who is only 6 months old, two primary schoolers, my DH is a shift worker, and I run my own small business. Sleep is a luxury around here. I know when I get adequate sleep I am stronger regarding binge eating but it's just not possible right now.

    Stress is another trigger.

    I don't get bored. I don't get lonely. There is too much to do, too many people to see.

    I love exercising- that's not a problem, I know what healthy foods are, it's the bingeing on high fat high sugar high carb food which is the problem for me.

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to made2bAmummy For This Useful Post:

    KiWolf  (13-06-2015)

  9. #18
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    I can see how we're similar in some ways like that- it's so difficult to control.

    I know some of the tactics already and the principles behind them- but in that moment when craving a binge it's certainly easier said than done- and it doesn't just pass like some people say after a few moments - or perhaps it does but for me then it comes back in waves sporadically- and those waves get stronger and stronger and harder to resist- and the binges tend to be worse for each time I have not given in when I finally do?

  10. #19
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    Oh lordy I can see myself in so many of these posts. The comfort/emotional eating is a big thing for me and it's like a compulsion I can't stop. I totally agree - it's not about the weight at all. I don't have any sage advice since I am nowhere near resolving this for myself, but I am reading along with interest. You are most definitely not alone OP

  11. #20
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    So nice to see how many people have this issue that I'm not alone (not that's it's nice you all share this issue!) I'll keep the thread alive and update what I learn from therapy and any new tactics I learn as we go! Feel free to do the same xo

  12. The Following User Says Thank You to KiWolf For This Useful Post:

    made2bAmummy  (13-06-2015)


 

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