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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2015

    Default I need to vent

    I’m a regular hubber but my friends know I frequent this forum and my username so I’ve decided to go anonymous. I know what I have to do to fix this I suppose this is more of a vent thread than anything.

    I’ve been part of a group of girls who I really felt comfortable with. This is until about 12 months ago when their behaviour towards me really changed

    For a start they disagree with every single thing I say whether it is an important discussion or just fluff. It comes off I’m being lectured and they are being condescending to me. It’s not like I’m being racist or homophobic or anything offensive just different views. But what really upsets me is a girl in the group that everyone else seems to butt kiss and there have been several times she has said pretty much identical to what I was lectured over and they gush telling her she's so insightful and how spot on she is. I'm left thinking how high school it has become.

    I also feel ignored. I am there for the other girls whenever they need me but whenever I need support or just to moan (we all need that don't we?) they smile, nod then change the subject. Often most of them won't even acknowledge what I’ve said at all. So I got paranoid that maybe I complained too much. I didn't complain for about 2-3 months only saying positive things while all the while they complained over first world stuff. I was supportive of them complaining about shoes and outings and minor tiffs with family. That their husbands bought the wrong car seat covers or whining about their workplace politics. At the end of this period I was feeling pretty down about something and really needed their support. I was just ignored

    I know I need to distance myself from them. I’m not sure what I’ve done but it's clear I'm not wanted any more. The funny thing is that they pride themselves on being so mature but their treatment of me is so hurtful and childish. I've been with them a while and there is no point to asking what is wrong. They will say there is nothing wrong when there clearly is. I've stopped attending the meet ups and lunches and no one has said a word that they have even noticed. Not that I'm doing it for attention I'm doing it because I know it's time to move on but I hoped they would at least commented I'd stopped coming.

    Feeling so lost and lonely right now
    Last edited by OneMoreRiver; 12-06-2015 at 14:39.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    God it's so high school. Chances are you will never know why it's happened. I would just move on and be thankful you don't have to see them anymore.

    I hope you find some new friends.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    I'm sad for you. Not a nice situation. I hope you find some lovely new friends!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I'm sorry, that's not a nice situation at all. It sounds like you might need some closure. Would it be worth speaking openly with one of the girls (one you trust the most)?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    If it were me I would need to confront it. Not to be confronting but to find out if it's in my head a bit iykwim. Sometimes I think we have conversations with ourselves based on how we think things went down and we can be wrong.

    Not saying this is your situation but maybe ask yourself if it's worth trying to find one of the girls you could have a chat with about how you feel.


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