I am a Step dad to two girls, one 14 and one 10.
We are having issues with the 14yr old at the moment. Everything she has told her friends at school is a lie. Some of these lies are just ludicrous e.g. her dad took off when she was born (no he didn't and has been in her life her whole life), she has 9 brothers and sisters (no she doesn't, just one sister), her grandad died (both are still alive), she takes medication for depression (no she doesn't and isn't depressed) tells her friends she's cutting herself (never has, we have asked) etc etc.
Now she has used both social media and texting to do all this. She has been caught lying before to her friends and we spoke with her and we though she understood and that she may stop. She hasn't.
I understand that most of this might be for attention or she's after sympathy and makes her friends think she has nothing.
We have also caught her out sending pics etc to boys and also texting quite sexual things, which to our knowledge has stopped.
Now it also looks like she has been going behind her best friends back and telling her friends boyfriend she loves him and to forget about her friend and then tells her friend the exact opposite. There's alot going on.
Now she has been spoken to before and it keeps happening. Being the step dad I don't step over the line and allow her mum to talk to her and decide what's the best action. After the recent things we have found though her mother won't talk to her and does nothing.
Now am I over the top here or because she's been given the benefit of the doubt several times and broke the trust placed in her by us, should she be punished? Social media taken away, mobile taken away, sort of grounded etc.Am I to old school? I mean she should be spoken to and realise that she broke the trust placed in her and that if her friends, or when, they find out she won't have any friends, and that's what worries me. She'll be outcast.
IF she should be punished etc how do I explain that to my wife without sounding like Im telling her how to raise her daughter?
Help me please!! Tell me if I'm being to over the top on this or should I just let it go?