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  1. #21
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    Number 2: "I realise I was best man at your wedding 1, but 2 and I are closer than we were then, and it means a lot to me to have him by my side".

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    Mod-Nomsie  (27-05-2015)

  3. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mod-Nomsie View Post
    It's tempting but I've already asked my sister and she is so excited... I would feel like a real douche saying we've changed our mind!
    What about changing her 'role' then... Let her know you are going to be untraditional with the roles & you'd like her to be the witness & get ready with her & then your DF only has to worry about a 'witness' you can still call her bridesmaid but then he has less pressure as the job is less important, let her know you want the photos to be about you, DF & kids.

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    JR03  (27-05-2015),Mod-Nomsie  (27-05-2015)

  5. #23
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    I second that men just don't think like women! Just ask your preferred option and don't worry becabuse guys just don't get into huffs over these kinds of things. I actually admire men for their simplicity sometimes

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    Mod-Nomsie  (27-05-2015)

  7. #24
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    I agree with everyone else, #2.

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    Mod-Nomsie  (27-05-2015)

  9. #25
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    You could get number 1 to do a special reading at your ceremony so he is still included

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    Mod-Nomsie  (28-05-2015)

  11. #26
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    yep

    No 2.

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    Mod-Nomsie  (28-05-2015)

  13. #27
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    No 2. If he really wants to throw no 1 a bone (that sounds awful. .... If he wants to involve no 1) is the mc job vacant?

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    Wise Enough  (28-05-2015)

  15. #28
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    It's your wedding. You only get to do it once (hopefully). Don't have anyone in your bridal party that you are unsure of. You will regret not having the people that you really wanted.

    I un-bridesmaid-ed someone before my wedding. We had a long engagement and I asked her right away when we got engaged, but in that time we just weren't really good friends anymore. She admitted that she knew it would happen as we weren't close anymore but she still took serious offence to it and turned up at my wedding in a white dress (she knew that was what my bridesmaids were wearing too) and tried to pretend she was still involved. Now I just can't stand her (not just because of the dress thing ) and I'm so so glad she wasn't my bridesmaid and isn't in all my wedding photos.

    DH had two mates as his groomsmen, and the one that he asked to be his best man was a really close friend at the time we got engaged (and also the ex-bridesmaids husband). But by the time the wedding came around he was definitely much closer to the other guy, although he was too nice/nervous to switch their roles. Now that ex-bridesmaid and myself aren't even on speaking terms he has understandably distanced himself too. So now we have awkwardly got all these nice wedding photos with a guy we're not friends with He also gave a really crappy speech that he clearly put no effort into.

    Sorry for the long post but I wanted to point out the importance of having who YOU want in your wedding party.

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    Mod-Nomsie  (28-05-2015)

  17. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by SpecialPatrolGroup View Post
    No 2. If he really wants to throw no 1 a bone (that sounds awful. .... If he wants to involve no 1) is the mc job vacant?
    He isn't a great public speaker

  18. #30
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    Definitely go with number 2. My bridesmaids were my sisters but my two closest friends did a reading at the ceremony and a non religious grace before dinner, hubby had his two brothers and a very good mate but his other mate was in charge of the music during the ceremony (the celebrant let us hook up to her speakers but it was his job to turn it on at right time). What about driving a car?

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    Mod-Nomsie  (28-05-2015)


 

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