Well today we found out that we MC'd our first baby.
This was our first attempt and we conceived in April.
I guess last night when it happened I tried to convince myself I was prepared for it but honestly I feel numb.
I don't have any feeling left about it and that scares me most of all. I don't know how to feel about it either.
I didn't react when the sonographer told me i felt like I knew already.
It's weird I felt like I knew before the U.S something changed yesterday arvo and it was done.
I've cried and apologized to DH ( who told me not to be stupid) I just feel that I have let him and myself down. I've talked with DH who is upset about it too.
I feel I need to start training again (physical training) like i think I need to make my core stronger and I need to be fitter and maybe that will help.
I know now isn't the time to be looking for answers and I shouldn't blame myself (kinda hard not too) but I'm home most of the day and I'm pretty sure I can't clean much more then I have today ( tomorrow the lounge gets pulled out and vaccines under).
I'm just not sure about anything.
Sorry for those who read this it's a bit long winded but I needed too see my thoughts on paper. I'm so confused on what to do next.
Keep on keeping on.