+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 3 FirstFirst 123 LastLast
Results 11 to 20 of 29
  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    21,728
    Thanks
    15,149
    Thanked
    11,353
    Reviews
    14
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 postsDiamond Star - 20,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the WeekBusiest Member of the Week - week ended 5/2/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 31/10/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 24/10/14Busiest Member of the Week
    Quote Originally Posted by Babyisbored View Post
    I don't really want him to feel he needs permission & he has spent his money in the past on stupid software (told me after he purchased it) that I got annoyed with but told him it's his fault if it doesn't work etc. I'm more annoyed that his family like to encourage him to do things behind my back, especially his mum. She was the one making a big drama about his brother in Holland. I don't want his family in Egypt to take advantage of us thinking we are rich.
    We have been on a tight budget with the baby, nearly everything is second hand. I hardly have any maternity clothes, got a few things from the op shop because my jeans were giving me agony & he kept telling me don't buy too much. He also complains we don't have much money & we are spending too much.
    I


    He asking you not spend on things you NEED and he throw a huge chunk of money at charity for his mum and than keeping a secret.

    Wow. That's not just a sign it a flashing neon board the size of football stadium.

    Seriously you you need to sort this out now or you will always be treated like dirt under his mother's feet.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    4,371
    Thanks
    1,580
    Thanked
    2,600
    Reviews
    10
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    If it's from his savings then no I wouldn't be upset.

    I would be annoyed that he didn't tell me but I would not have been in a position to tell him what to do with his money anyway.

  3. #13
    harvs's Avatar
    harvs is offline Winner 2014 - Spirit of BubHub Award
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    10,123
    Thanks
    6,341
    Thanked
    16,208
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 9/4/15Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 2/4/15Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 19/3/15Busiest Member of the Week200 Posts in a week
    Yeah now I have more information - there is a serious imbalance and that's not ok.

    I agree with @LoveLivesHere.

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to harvs For This Useful Post:

    KitiK  (11-05-2015)

  5. #14
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    1,171
    Thanks
    522
    Thanked
    731
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I understand your annoyance. I'm trying to think if dh did that, would I be annoyed... I can't say that I would be. He's very responsible with money and I trust his decisions with it. That's not to say you aren't justified in your feelings, especially when he starts with "I did something and you might be mad"...

    Edit. Sorry, just read the full thread. Given the history, absolutely justified in being upset!
    Last edited by Olive Oil; 11-05-2015 at 09:06.

  6. #15
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    42
    Thanks
    8
    Thanked
    9
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by LoveLivesHere View Post
    I


    He asking you not spend on things you NEED and he throw a huge chunk of money at charity for his mum and than keeping a secret.

    Wow. That's not just a sign it a flashing neon board the size of football stadium.

    Seriously you you need to sort this out now or you will always be treated like dirt under his mother's feet.
    Yep already feel like that. Especially since falling pregnant.

  7. #16
    SuperGranny's Avatar
    SuperGranny is offline Worlds best grandma! Winner 2012 - Most Helpful Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    sunshine coast qld
    Posts
    6,246
    Thanks
    4,673
    Thanked
    2,850
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    can he tell you the name of the charity>?? I wonder if this might be just another gift to another family member. ? you are struggling to get everything ready for your new baby, and you are shopping in op shops for your own needs, and he has 'savings" ?? what are the savings for?? I can understand if it is for a house deposit for you both. or something important like that, but surely savings are not meant to held only for donations to charities.?? this is very wrong, and keeping secrets about money is a definite red flag for your relationship, and for your future together. hugs, marie.

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to SuperGranny For This Useful Post:

    Tinkers  (11-05-2015)

  9. #17
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    22,969
    Thanks
    6,261
    Thanked
    17,171
    Reviews
    10
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 postsDiamond Star - 20,000 posts
    Awards:
    Bubhub Blogger - Thanks100 Posts in a week
    I would be furious. His savings? ummm no it's both your savings it's not the 1950's. Ask him how he would feel if you gave your family member 2k out of the family's pocket then failed to tell him.

  10. The Following User Says Thank You to delirium For This Useful Post:

    Tinkers  (11-05-2015)

  11. #18
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    4,371
    Thanks
    1,580
    Thanked
    2,600
    Reviews
    10
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    I would be furious. His savings? ummm no it's both your savings it's not the 1950's. Ask him how he would feel if you gave your family member 2k out of the family's pocket then failed to tell him.
    some families work well with some financial independency.
    I have savings that are mine only and so does DH.

  12. #19
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Posts
    722
    Thanks
    186
    Thanked
    167
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I would be completely furious about the secret, not the money - just like you say.

    As hard as it will be, I would just try to talk about it like the money is no big deal, he should do exactly what he wants, it's his choice etc and then just say you'd like to be told, it's hurtful to think others know about it but not you and that's all.

    I think the end of a pregnancy can be scary/hard for the guy. My DH went a bit loopy/emotional and I think they feel scared and helpless sometimes but don't know how to show it. As hard as it is, I'd try to go easy on him.

  13. #20
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    4,629
    Thanks
    1,320
    Thanked
    2,597
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I would be furious.


 

Similar Threads

  1. I don't like what my new fitbit is telling me....
    By Zabella in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 14-09-2014, 21:27
  2. Someone other than you telling your 7yo what periods are...
    By Clarabelle in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 11-06-2014, 11:09

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
sales & new stuffsee all
Bub Hub Sales Listing
HAVING A SALE? Let parents know about it with a Bub Hub Sales listing. Listings are featured on our well trafficked Sales Page + selected randomly to appear on EVERY page
featured supporter
Pea Pods Reusable Nappies
Pea Pods are the smart choice when it comes to choosing what's best for you, your baby and the environment. Affordable and simple to use, Pea Pods keep your baby dry & happy. Visit our website to find your nearest stockist or order online.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!