Hi guys I've been reading your posts and this is my first about 4 months ago I did an AMH test (i have never TTC) and was shocked to find out that just a few weeks before my 30th birthday my AMH was 3.4. I have been in a 4 year relationship with my 38 year old partner which has been challenging and felt he would freak out if I involved him (I was very upfront when we met that I wanted to start a family before 30, he has regularly tells he wants the same thing but not sure of he wants it with me/ not sure if the relationship is right) so I went to the specialist appt by myself. The specialist recommend freezing eggs and said I should do it within 3 months. Total shock! I got all the paperwork from Monash that said I needed to do police check, child protection check, bloods, scan etc all of which I did ASAP so I could start tretment.
My partner then starting voicing his concerns that he was excluded and wanted to be involved so I though fantastic -Finally he is stepping up and committing to me! He asked to come along to my first appt at monash to meet the patient coordinator and counsellor who spoke about different options- eggs or embryos. We left both thinking we could chose which path we wanted to go down then proceed. Conversation after this was all pro- embryo.
I also brought my partner back to the specialist with me so he could get further info on embryos. The doc gave him forms for getting blood and sperm tests done. Again, conversation after this was all pro- embryo. Weeks passed as I was waiting for my next cycle and I noticed my partner hadn't done bloods or sperm checks so I raised with him if he was still undecided. He said yes. Another week passed with no decision so I said to him I just had to go ahead and proceed with the egg collection on my own because I couldn't jepordise missing another cycle while he made up his mind. His argument now is that he was 'willing' to do embryos to give me information about my egg quality, but not 'wanting' to create life with me!!
I called the nurse to arrange an appt to collect my meds and she said she didn't have the instructions from the doctor yet so I called the docs room and explained the situation (embarrassing!) And asked the doc to send the nurse instructions for egg collection. Two days before the nurse appt she calls and says the doc still hasn't sent through my file AND the counsellor won't sign me off because my situation has changed!
I have now missed ANOTHER cycle and am so frustrated and disappointed. I don't know if the nurse and counsellor understand my time constraints and I can't believe they won't sign off treatment! I have also since found out that I never needed to do police check and child protection check for just egg collection so I could have theoretically had the procedure done two months ago.
The counsellor has asked to see both me AND my partner before she signs me off. I just want to proceed on my own with egg collection as if I was single, in my mind my partner has given away his opportunity to be involved and I am now questioning if I can stay with someone who has acted this way.
Has anyone else heard of/gone through a counsellor not signing off?
Has anyone gone through a relationship breakdown during ivf?
Sorry about the long post!