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  1. #1
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    Default When dad goes for custody after 6 years no contact

    So my child's father had visitation stopped 6 and a half years ago as he was on drugs threatening violence etc etc. DVOs were in place for 3 years. we did mediation the first time and agreed to supervised visits which he didn't show for. Then mediation a second time where we didn't agree then I never heard from him again for over 6 years. He moved back to our town a few months ago and has had 6 hours of visitation but that's now been stopped after drunken abuse and threats against us again. What will happen when he takes me to court again which he will. My child is now nearly 8 and doesn't want to see him and I worry as he isn't stable drinking smoking pot etc etc. I know mediation is first step but I want court orders instead. And what if he takes her from her school......can I call the cops.his name is not on birth certificate.
    So have any of you been through a similar situation and can advise me.

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    Im sorry, i cant help you from a custody pov, but i would think his past behaviour would not work in his favour. As a teacher, i just wanted to comment on your concern of him collecting the child from school - i wouls approach the school and let them know that you are concerned he will attempt unauthorised collection. Let them know that he does not have custody of your child, and is under no circumstances allowed to collect the child. Give them a photo of him if you have one. You can do this for the front office and your childs teacher. If you tell them your concerns,they can be vigilant in preventing him from coming in & collecting the child.

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    Also with the school thing as your child is nearly 8 can you explain to them that 'dad' is not allowed to collect them from school (as well as telling the school obviously) and if he tries they must tell a teacher they are not allowed to go with him.

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    Thanks I have contacted school and while they can guarantee he can't pick her up they can't watch her that closely at lunchtime. She knows not to go with him but worry is there. Not sure if I can get temporary custody while waiting for proper court date etc

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    Sorry, but that's unacceptable for the school to say they can't watch that closely at lunchtime.

    If it is a true risk then they have a duty of care towards your daughter. If they can't provide some details of contingency plans or ways that they will try to protect your daughter I'd be questioning keeping her there to be honest.

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    Mrs Tickle  (06-04-2015)

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    If you really want Court Orders, why don't you apply to Court. Sometimes you can seek exemptions from the requirement to do mediation if there has been a history of family violence, threats were made, and the matter is urgent (for example). If you were seeking injunctions preventing him from taking her from her school because he has threatened to do that, the Court would probably hear you out. That would just be a first step to make sure your child is safe and not removed from your care. You could then go attend mediation if appropriate. You should see about getting legal advice from legal aid (if you qualify) or a community legal centre / law firm that deal with family law matters. It sounds like the kind of case you want to handle properly before it gets out of hand.

    Good luck!

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    Mrs Tickle  (06-04-2015)

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    I don't know where you live - things work differently in various states and territories. But absolutely what Team has said: go to a family law solicitor or a womens community legal centre and seek an order and nip this thing in the bud. It would appear you have several factors working in your favour.

    In addition, definitely contact the school and have things put in place. As Harvs has said, if the child is at risk, damn right they can watch her closely.

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    If he isn't on the birth certificate I believe he would firstly need to prove paternity via way of a DNA test before seeking orders for your child. I would absolutely be applying to court first for sole parental responsibility.

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    Has he been paying child support? If he’s not on the birth certificate and not showing any continuous parental responsibility then I would be waiting until he pushes for DNA tests. At this point if he’s not doing anything to show parental responsibility, he’s really just some stranger that drops in and out of your child’s life and has some substance misuse issues. I would also be reading up on ‘unacceptable risk’ in relation to a child’s best interests and safety planning with your child just in case he does try to take her. If he does take her then yes, call the police. It’s not a rational thing to take a child at random.



  12. #10
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    So I talked to legal aid and I don't have a lot of rights. Even not on birth certificate he can take her as the fact we have done mediation before proves parentage. I could apply for a recovery order but if she is safe and being cared for they may only issue a location order to tell me the address where she is. I would then have to take it to court to get her back. As for the school there isn't anything more they can do as there Re no orders in place. Guess it's time to uproot my kids once again because of this ******* and move


 

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