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  1. #31
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    I read it when I had my first baby. The thing I disagreed with most was listening to my 6 week old baby cry her heart out while I patted her for the minimum 22 minutes Tizzie says. It didn't feel right for me and I needed to pick her up to settle her. I also didn't agree with waking my sleeping baby according to the clock/a routine written in a book. My feeling is that DD is a human being, not a robot so if she needs a longer nap she can have one.
    I ended up reading a few other books and settling techniques and used all the information to do what I thought was right/what worked for DD. I followed SOS routines loosely.
    Interestingly, when DD was 4 months old and still catnapping I new I needed to ditch the dummy as SOS and other books had recommended. So at that point, when DD was that little bit older and I was extremely over tired, I was able to let DD cry for certain periods and then pick her up and hold her/comfort her and repeat until she learnt to sleep without the dummy. It was still hard to do then but I just couldn't do it like Tizzie says when she was 6 weeks old.
    So my advice would be to try it and if it works and you are happy then great, and if not, understand that Tizzie does NOT have all the answers and there are lots of other great methods out there. All the best

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  3. #32
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    I have read the book. I don't agree with her advice on sleep training a 2 week old baby. She says to "be prepared for a little crying" so I always chuckle when people say she doesn't advocate crying.

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  5. #33
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    I haven't read her books or website but I would be very weary of anyone who suggests, "if you do ABC then your baby will do XYZ". The spectrum of normal behaviour and sleep for babies is huge and none of them will have had the benefit of reading T Hall.

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  7. #34
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    SOS was good in theory but when my dd was born I found the whole thing too strict ie timing feeds, expressing, waking baby just cos it was supposedly time. It took the joy out of having a baby and made more stress than anything. There are definitely parts of the book I found helpful mainly when the baby is older and starting solids but I think babies are young for such a short time, enjoy all the cuddles, snuggles and feeds you can while you can cos they grow quicker than you can imagine. Enjoy your new born.

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  9. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by BigRedV View Post
    I have read the book. I don't agree with her advice on sleep training a 2 week old baby. .
    100% agree with this.

  10. #36
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    @heplusme

    I too read the book before my bub arrived and things seemed sensible at the time but my opinion of SOS changed when I actually had my bub in my arms.

    My biggest criticism of SOS is the idea of putting a newborn on a routine from birth. If you plan to breastfeed then following set times rather than your babies needs May affect your supply. It's bub suckling on your nipples that stimulates milk production and in the early days, weeks and during growth spurts it's the frequent feeding that will help with your supply. I found that the SOS timings conflicts with that. So if you plan to breastfeed don't focus on enforcing someone else's idea of a routine because your baby may have different needs and I know that is rather feed my baby to keep her calm than wait an hour for the scheduled feed time!

    On another note I do feel like there is so much pressure to follow a routine from such a young age. Both you and bub will have a steep learning curve and for atleast the first few weeks please be kind to yourself and don't stress about a routine. It's a nice goal to work towards but gradually introducing a structure to your day would be beneficial to all involved.

    This has worked for us. So we decided that for the first 2 months we followed DD cues and I noticed that after 6 weeks she was starting to feed at regular times. We started a bedtime routine at about 6 weeks and from 8 weeks I have a feeding routine over the day that follows the feed/play/sleep philosophy. But even then we are flexible to DD needs so that it's less stress for everyone involved. Babies change so much in the first few months that I'd say that being flexible and adaptable helps.

    So I'd recommend following your instincts. There are many parenting books out there so do read widely to get ideas and relieve anxieties but don't feel like there will be a right answer. It depends on your philosophy and what your bub is like...hope that helps!

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  12. #37
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    I have found the SOS routines useful for my 3rd child. I had 2 bad sleepers before this and would have given my right arm to not go through that again. It seems to be working quite well for us so far, bub is 6 months old. We didn't start until he was 8 weeks old though, for me a newborn doesn't need a routine- they wake up, you feed them, change nappy, feed again, swaddle and back to sleep- repeat as many times as they need in 24hrs.

  13. #38
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    It's worked for both my boys - they have slept through (7pm-7am) from about 4-5 months. I don't think they are good sleepers because that's they way they are.... That I am lucky. It's because of the choices I've made (and hubby has also followed) regarding their sleep and general day.

    I was first drawn to SOS because I am a 'planner' who found it difficult to read bubs signs. I found having a schedule very useful - mainly because it 'alerted' me to a window when bub may be tired/hungry etc. A schedule might not suit everyone - and that's ok.

    Why do I think SOS cops such a hard time on here and in the general public? Could be a combination of factors.
    - people who have never read the book or who have only read one paragraph jump to conclusions based on negative hype (everytime someone says SOS is controlled crying... That's a good indicator they dont know what they are talking about)
    - routines and schedules aren't for everyone. That's ok but some think having a different parenting style is a license to be narky towards others (which is not ok).
    - No one likes to feel like they have failed at something. when people say "I follow SOS .. Which involves No dummy... No feeding to sleep... And my kids sleep through the night." This opens up the conversation to suggest that what a parent does can and does impact how well their child sleeps. And this offends some - for example parents whose kids wake multiple times at night may feel like others are saying it's their fault that their baby doesn't sleep well.
    - Some people are just having a bad day and putting another parents choices down makes them feel good about themselves for a few minutes.
    - there are some parts in the book that aren't perfect (just as with any parenting book).

    My hints and tips for your consideration:
    - think about holding off starting until bub is 8 weeks. Those early days are a shambles no matter what so just go with the flow.
    - read the book from cover to cover. Do this every few months - the amount of times I would try and fix something and the answer was in the book all along but I had just forgotten ... Doh!
    - the blanket guide works for lots of ladies and despite what has been thrown around here isn't against SIDS guidelines and hasn't caused harm. That being said I find it easier to use a sleeping bag and thermostat controlled heater - much easier than adding and removing blankets.
    - join the SOS fan page on Facebook before bub is due. Some fantastic supportive ladies giving advice in a non judgemental way. A really well moderated forum. Makes in really easy to 'get' some of the comments - saves many from having to join the paid forum for additional advice . PM me if you would like the details.
    - don't worry that you won't have any flexibility on the routine. I was able to go to mothers group, coffee dates, library dates etc. You just have to think ahead (eg getting somewhere 30 mins early and takings bub for a walk in the pram at nap time). Try and plan to be home for at least one of bubs naps.


    If you decide to try out SOS feel free to PM me if you have any questions. If you decide not to, that's ok too.

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  15. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Busy-Bee View Post
    I haven't read her books or website but I would be very weary of anyone who suggests, "if you do ABC then your baby will do XYZ". The spectrum of normal behaviour and sleep for babies is huge and none of them will have had the benefit of reading T Hall.
    If you haven't read the book, how can you say the Author says this?

    Genuinely confused.

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    Here is good summary of the issues and evidence by a researcher in developmental psychology. http://evolutionaryparenting.com/edu...on-one-crying/.

    In addition to SOS disregarding decades old research and theory regarding child development, it made me quite anxious and zapped my fledgling confidence as a mother.

    In fact, I found that any sleep book that said that my DD should be sleeping x many hours at y times and should definitely self-settle or SHE IS DOOMED TO BE A TERRIBLE SLEEPER FOR ETERNITY was really unhelpful for me and my particular bub, who wasn't a routine chick or a self-settler at all. She has an active and inquisitive temperament, so was never 'drowsy but awake' and would 'emotional cry' as soon as she hit the cot. Implying that SOS doesn't work because you aren't following her methods exactly is patronising and disempowering for new mothers who deserve all the support they can get.

    If your baby fits the SOS mould, then great. But please read widely and figure out what feels right for you as a parent. Remember that there is no conclusive evidence that sleep training works in the long term (existing studies have methodological flaws), so if something doesn't feel right to you, then listen to your mummy instincts first and foremost.

    If you're after routines, try Jo Ryan's 'baby bliss', which is markedly gentler than SOS. If you're after info on infant emotional/social development and parents' role in this, read up on the EP site I linked or Pinky McKay.

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