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  1. #211
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    Quote Originally Posted by Killarneygirl View Post
    Hi ladies, I've been missing since my chemical in January this year although I have been popping in to read every few weeks. Given my age we jumped straight back in again and had a cycle in February which resulted in 4 fertilised (they failed to access any of the 10. Follicles on my left side) but by day 3 they all looked too good for the bin, so they transferred the two best of a bad lot. No miracle pregnancy occurred however one of the remaining two made it to day five blast at grade 1 go figure! I managed to get a frostie for the first time ever woohoo.

    So had my transfer on Saturday and am in the torturous tww and trying to not drive myself demented searching for symptoms etc. my blood test is due on Thursday which is earlier than my previous tests? Is that normal with natural FET?
    Good luck @Killarneygirl ! If you transferred on Saturday with a 5 day embie then that puts O day back at the previous Monday (in theory) so I would have thought anytime after this coming Monday is good for a BT. Thursday will actually be 17dpo won't it ?

  2. #212
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    @Killarneygirl Yeah, that sounds like day 17 which is plenty. I've had a faint BFP on day 11.

  3. #213
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    Hi ladies, I've been absent for a few days after hitting rock bottom. Thanks for all of your support.

    Hey just wanted to chip in Leyshoja, I'm tall and love it. Thought I would add my opinion on it seeing as so many here have said they are short. Don't be discouraged ladies from choosing tall donors. I'm tall and slim without a broad frame, maybe it's harder being tall with a big build, but here's the list of advantages I have had through being tall.

    1. Made it to a really high level of basketball. Height is an advantage in lots of sports.
    2. Chosen as a Flight attendant for worlds safest airline in my younger years (there's a height advantage in some careers!) And what fun we had in those days.
    3. It helps with confidence when I walk into a room or a meeting.
    4. Don't need high heels although I used to love wearing them anyway.
    5. Most clothes look good on me. Supermodels are tall!
    6. Taller than my husband. Helpful in arguments.

    So girls, go ahead and pick a tall egg donor! Just check their BMI as well.

    On a more serious note, I've been doing some long delayed tasks this week which most ppl would find onerous. Like doing my tax and getting root canal at the endodontist. All of it is a breeze compared to ivf! So yes, Emerald we're still going for a second opinion, but I have a feeling I've got one foot out the ivf door now. I want to have a life again. And someone else said there's still hope at 42 but I feel I've been trapped in false hope. My gut feeling is it's not going to happen. So officially now, babies and ivf are not my number 1 priority. And I feel lighter for it.


    Chiefs, Bongley, Lesiy, Emerald, Nereid, Leyshoja, Tuxcat, MaxKat, Blondie and everyone else thank you so much. I'm not going to disappear completely. Just taking a step back. Will check in here and see how you are all going. It's great to see you Chiefs, Bongley and Leyshoja, advancing so quickly with your DE plans. Go the tall egg donors!
    Last edited by Skyler; 17-04-2015 at 22:04.

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  5. #214
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    Hi

    I'm upset. My husband says it's all I talk about, getting pregnant, Foster care, not having a third child.

    I do feel ungrateful and a fraud especially on this forum when some of you have not got your first baby yet.

    We're waiting to do our last cycle and not feeling optimistic.

    Hubby says I need to go back to the counsellor, as he can't handle me upset anymore and thinks I should be feeling blessed for what I have.

    I really do feel totally blessed but how do I get over that longing for a third?

  6. #215
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    Go the DE ladies as well, I'm so jealous you're going this route as I know you've all got a fabulous chance of getting a baby.

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  8. #216
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    Quote Originally Posted by Luckyme1 View Post
    Hi

    I'm upset. My husband says it's all I talk about, getting pregnant, Foster care, not having a third child.

    I do feel ungrateful and a fraud especially on this forum when some of you have not got your first baby yet.

    We're waiting to do our last cycle and not feeling optimistic.

    Hubby says I need to go back to the counsellor, as he can't handle me upset anymore and thinks I should be feeling blessed for what I have.

    I really do feel totally blessed but how do I get over that longing for a third?

    I know what you mean, it feels like it's all I talk about too. I admit I am definitely envious of you though, you've been really lucky to have 2. The only advice I can give you is don't let it affect your relationship. Maybe you should give yourself an additional focus, so rather than just Ivf you are also planning a holiday, say, or a Reno, or something else biggish. Although I know full well that Ivf sucks up all spare funds in my house. Now that I'm looking at capetown all I seem to be talking about is that. Where we will stay, what we can do, eat, drive to etc. it's nice to have a different focus for a change (even tho it's still related to Ivf lol). Maybe just get your Ivf and foster care plans in place, then leave it at that. Eg one more Ivf then if bfn start the foster care process and get all your ducks lined up ready for it. If you know your path you can at least stop questioning it and settle into it, so to speak.

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  10. #217
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    Quote Originally Posted by Luckyme1 View Post
    Hi

    I'm upset. My husband says it's all I talk about, getting pregnant, Foster care, not having a third child.

    I do feel ungrateful and a fraud especially on this forum when some of you have not got your first baby yet.

    We're waiting to do our last cycle and not feeling optimistic.

    Hubby says I need to go back to the counsellor, as he can't handle me upset anymore and thinks I should be feeling blessed for what I have.

    I really do feel totally blessed but how do I get over that longing for a third?
    Oh I completely understand @Luckyme1 I also feel a fraud as we have one child, so I feel your pain and confusion and guilt.
    Easter was awful as it was all small talk and when someone asked me what we'd been up to I was genuinely lost for words and would mumble "Uh, yeah, not a lot really....." as my mind was screaming "8 rounds of f#&king IVF!" I just hate gatherings these days as I can't speak my mind. Plus the other thing we have been doing is house hunting which I really don't want to talk about that either, so dull really.

    I tried to talk to my partner last night. My potential donor wants us to skype next week and now he feels rushed into everything. So I gave him some space yesterday to absorb it all. I wrote a pros and cons list this morning and I told him we'd talk tomorrow. Thing is, if we go with this donor now and everything goes perfectly (as if) then we would cycle in July and I would be popping out a sprog this time next year, when I would be 43 going on 44!

    I agree with @leshoja, make your plan and focus on getting through that. easier to say than do I know. We planned to stop at 4 IVF then 5 then 6 and it ended up being 7 EPUs. But we were in agreement with that, so it must be really hard if you want to keep trying and your DH doesn't

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  12. #218
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    Default IVF over 40 #13

    I'll be 43 going on 44 by then too DP will be 46. This is why I'm rushing everything. Literally 15 minutes ago I happened to ask him how old he feels is too old for him to be a new father and he said a couple more years so phew
    Last edited by JulieMalooley; 18-04-2015 at 10:45.

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  14. #219
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    Quote Originally Posted by Luckyme1 View Post
    Hi

    I'm upset. My husband says it's all I talk about, getting pregnant, Foster care, not having a third child.

    I do feel ungrateful and a fraud especially on this forum when some of you have not got your first baby yet.

    We're waiting to do our last cycle and not feeling optimistic.

    Hubby says I need to go back to the counsellor, as he can't handle me upset anymore and thinks I should be feeling blessed for what I have.

    I really do feel totally blessed but how do I get over that longing for a third?
    Lucky, ivf nearly destroyed my life. I put my career and everything else on hold and lost my self esteem because I saw not being able to have a baby=failure in life which is so not true.
    I went to the counsellor at Genea this week, had my biggest cry ever with her, then immediately have started to feel slightly better having made the mental shift towards closing the door. No offence intended but maybe you could benefit from counselling too. Especially when your husband has suggested it. Don't let the issue of a third child affect your marriage. Counselling is not fun at the time but it does help. You're not a fraud, but yes there are those of us who are going to remain childless and view you as very fortunate.

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  16. #220
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    Thanks skylar, Bongley and leyshoja.

    I am very fortunate and blessed and I think going to a counsellor is a good idea. I feel frustrated at my emotions when rationally we are very lucky and I agree with my husband that we will only do one stim.

    I am really lucky he wants to do Foster care too.

    Thank you ladies for being so understanding and listening, I am hoping and praying with you that your baby will come and I will be here to listen too on your journey.

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