+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast
Results 11 to 20 of 33
  1. #11
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Posts
    4,186
    Thanks
    1,270
    Thanked
    2,594
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    I didn't grow up with extended family as we moved interstate when I was 7. I missed growing up without cousins, aunts and uncles etc around. Even now as an adult I try to come back for SA each year to spend time with the extended family. It's been made slightly harder now my parents have moved interstate and my sister, BIL and nephew are there too. It does become expensive with all the travel.

    My sister and I were talking the other day and I think we're both on the same page. She doesn't want to come back to Bris and I don't want to go to where she is. If we both had the opportunity to move to Melbourne or Adelaide together, we probably would because we want our kids to grow up with each other. The bonus of Adelaide is that we have more family and my aunt has a DD the same age as my nephew (and they are so cute together).

  2. The Following User Says Thank You to M'LadyEm For This Useful Post:

    MAJS  (20-03-2015)

  3. #12
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Mildura
    Posts
    1,565
    Thanks
    486
    Thanked
    395
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    I think it's important I gre up around extended family we had so much fun but my children only get to visit their cousins on the rare occasion and they miss them so much when we aren't there.

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to LiterallyNoOne For This Useful Post:

    MAJS  (20-03-2015)

  5. #13
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    2,730
    Thanks
    1,522
    Thanked
    1,960
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I didn't have extended family around as a kid, and I really felt I was missing out. I found it sad that I only had three real ongoing relationships - my mum, my dad and my sister. Loved my friends and all, but they're not usually lifelong relationships.

    Our kids will probably grow up with extended family. My sister, brother in law and niece live very close by. My MIL and SIL live about 10 minutes away (although they may move a few hours away soon), and my parents are about 40 minutes away. I LOVE watching DD with all these people who love her, it's wonderful. It really is the main thing keeping us in this city. I'd love to live elsewhere (as would DP), but hesitate to leave family.

    I think what matters most though is what YOU think. As I say, I wish I'd had more family around growing up, but my parents made their own choices and I had a great childhood. If the city you live in is what's important to you and you're happy there, then I wouldn't be moving because other people think extended family's more important.

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to Renn For This Useful Post:

    MAJS  (20-03-2015)

  7. #14
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    10,309
    Thanks
    3,126
    Thanked
    6,315
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts

    Default How important is it for children to grow up around extended family

    For me , it's important but as others have said I suppose it's what you are used to - we grew up with my grandparents living next door and my aunts/uncles/cousins all involved in our lives quite regularly, a couple of my aunts and uncles and cousins and I are still very close and I definitely want that for DS, especially as an only child , so I am blessed to have my parents in the same street and my sister and 2 SIL all living within a 5km radius of our house, we do family dinners on my side every week and on DH side every fortnight - I think it's important for DS to see his family regularly , we invite all the family to DS parties and my brother ( lives in melbourne) and my very close aunt and uncle ( live in QLD) always fly in for it as we do for their family celebrations - again we are lucky we all get on , DH does not see any of his aunts and cousins unless it's a funeral!
    Last edited by Elijahs Mum; 20-03-2015 at 13:31.

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to Elijahs Mum For This Useful Post:

    MAJS  (20-03-2015)

  9. #15
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Location
    Inner West
    Posts
    3,267
    Thanks
    1,892
    Thanked
    1,916
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the WeekBusiest Member of the Week - week ended 19/9/2014Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 17/7/2014200 Posts in a week100 Posts in a week
    You don't necessarily have to move - could you have a yearly Xmas party or joint camping trip?

  10. The Following User Says Thank You to ScubaGal For This Useful Post:

    MAJS  (20-03-2015)

  11. #16
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    1,976
    Thanks
    324
    Thanked
    804
    Reviews
    2
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    [QUOTE=MAJS;8134834]Our primary school aged kids have been away from extended family since they were very young (As we live interstate). I often think they are missing out and feel we should move back where family are, mostly to give them extra support, experience and memories of their extended family.
    We are currently very happy where we are living except for not having family around and not having a big circle of very close family-like friendships.
    So my question is how important is it for children to have extended family around them growing up and how do you come to a decision that you can’t decide on despite doing pro’s and con’s list.
    Ultimately I want what is best for the kids, but is extended family more important in their lives as opposed to a city with lower crime rate, good schools and lower unemployment rates etc?
    Any thoughts advice would be appreciated, thanks
    [/

    Absolutely chose the lower crime rate, lower unemployment, better schools over the extended family.

    I grew up with extended family nearby but not really part of our lives. They were around, but we didn't do things together as extended family. Each family unit did their own thing. (Does that even make sense?!)

    Anyway, I now live interstate from any family, just me and my girls, and seriously, I find I prefer it this way. We visited with them in November last year and had good quality time for about 10 days. Mum and dad fly up here a couple of times a year, and my brother is visiting us tomorrow as he's flying through here on holidays.

    My kids know who they are, we talk about them, but they're not missing out on anything.

    That's just my opinion..

  12. The Following User Says Thank You to preggasaurus For This Useful Post:

    MAJS  (20-03-2015)

  13. #17
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    At home
    Posts
    1,396
    Thanks
    601
    Thanked
    1,398
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I grew up with no extended family, and i hate that i dont have that bond with anyone! No family BBQs or Christmases etc. Ive always thought it was really sad. But thats just me, and the grass is always greener!

  14. The Following User Says Thank You to heplusme For This Useful Post:

    MAJS  (20-03-2015)

  15. #18
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    The Kimberley WA
    Posts
    4,622
    Thanks
    916
    Thanked
    1,180
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Ultimately I want what is best for the kids, but is extended family more important in their lives as opposed to a city with lower crime rate, good schools and lower unemployment rates [/QUOTE]

    This paragraph above pretty much sums up why we live where we live as well as the beautiful surrounds we have and the fact the kids get to experience much that city kids don't. And to us these factors are more important than being close to family at this point in time. We do however visit the city every 3 months or so, so don't feel the kids are really missing out, it's not like they never see family and don't know them. The kids have a good relationship with their aunts, cousins and grandparents regardless of the distance.
    Last edited by Blessedwith3boys; 20-03-2015 at 14:29.

  16. The Following User Says Thank You to Blessedwith3boys For This Useful Post:

    MAJS  (20-03-2015)

  17. #19
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Posts
    1,187
    Thanks
    482
    Thanked
    1,049
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Awards:
    Bubhub Blogger
    I grew up about a 7 hour drive from all my extended family. We still had a great relationship with most of them. We travelled down for most Christmases, Easters and other special events. Our family also visited us during the year.

    It was great to have this connection, but without living in each others pockets. I know people who went to the same school as their cousins, or would see their Aunt at the shops. I find that very weird.

    Now we live a 2 hour flight away from our families. We get to see them quite often, so DD is building a good relationship with her cousins. While the family support closer would be nice, we like our own space and think our lifestyle choice is more important than living close (at this stage).

  18. The Following User Says Thank You to DJ Nette For This Useful Post:

    MAJS  (20-03-2015)

  19. #20
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Posts
    6,872
    Thanks
    5,195
    Thanked
    3,896
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    For me extended family is important. For dh not as much. But then now as adults he barely knows his cousins and my cousins are like siblings. For me family always comes first.

    I'd live in a crappy town if I had family there. We are moving to canberra in November instead of sydney as I have family there and none in Sydney.

  20. The Following User Says Thank You to Rose&Aurelia&Hannah For This Useful Post:

    MAJS  (20-03-2015)


 

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 30
    Last Post: 12-12-2014, 16:07
  2. What do you do for Easter with your children/family?
    By LoCo in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 16-04-2014, 14:53

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Bamboo Lulu
Unique, non-toxic wooden eco toys for babies. Water-based paints, saliva-resistant & baby safe. Super soft, prints & basics for baby, made from bamboo & organic cotton. Hypoallergenic - great for eczema relief. FREE gift with purchase. Code BUBHUB
sales & new stuffsee all
Pea Pods
Buy 2 Award Winning Pea Pods Reusable One Size Nappies for only $38 (in your choice of colours) and receive a FREE roll of Bamboo Liners. Don't miss out, we don't usually have discounts on the nappies, so grab this special offer!
Special Offer! Save $12
featured supporter
The MAMA Centre
Pregnancy, birth & beyond care with your very own midwife. Home & hospital birth support, VBACs, antenatal & postnatal care by medicare eligible midwives & holistic health practitioners. Massage, chiro, naturopathy, yoga, counselling & beauty therapy
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!