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  1. #1
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    Default Marriage.. Lost our way

    DD is 18 months and we are expecting bub # 2 in 4 weeks. I guess the title says it all. I feel as though DH and I have lost our way somewhere along the line.
    With every day life and so much happening sometimes its hard to get time with the 2 of us. Has anyone else felt like this and what kind of things can we do to bring back the spark between us

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    I think it's really easy for this to happen in the midst of having babies and young children.

    We don't have family to assist with babysitting so we can have date nights or anything so every "date" we have involves the kids as well.

    What I've found the greatest for us is doing things out of the ordinary. Going away with the family for a night or weekend somewhere, where I dont have to worry about the rest of the household stuff.. That way the focus HAS to be on living in the moment and enjoying the time we are spending together

    Small things like kicking back and watching a movie or couple of tv shows after the kids are in bed help..

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    This happens to us all the time. We go through little ups and downs. I've found writing little notes, dropping little extra treats in his lunch box and sending a few dirty little texts here and there go a long way to making a difference in the spark.
    I actually would avoid reconnecting via movies and TV. I find it really cold and you usually end up on opposite sides of the couch not interacting.
    Turn the TV off. Go straight to the bedroom after the kids are in bed and just snuggle, kiss, talk and hang out like you prob used to when you were dating.

    Prev I have booked a massage for df As a surprise. He loved that and came home in such a good mood. He works long hrs and this has a big impact on our romantic life too. You could also try making a special desert for him after dinner.
    Offering a shoulder rub or running him a bath. Or just sit next to him on the couch ttly nude and wait for him to turn the TV off and go a bit crazy for you.
    I find by initiating things - he reciprocates more etc. Someone has to start somewhere. : )

  4. #4
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    SuperGranny is offline Worlds best grandma! Winner 2012 - Most Helpful Member
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    hi rubytuesday, I think every relationship goes through patches like this. don't be afraid to speak with your dh, let him know how you are feeling, and that you are wanting to increase the 'spark'. together you might find a simple solution. a special late night dessert, a glass of wine together after the children are asleep. it doesn't have to be anything expensive or too complicated, just find some time alone. marie.


 

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