+ Reply to Thread
Page 4 of 11 FirstFirst ... 23456 ... LastLast
Results 31 to 40 of 102
  1. #31
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    12,710
    Thanks
    9,559
    Thanked
    12,691
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 9/1/15Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 7/11/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 3/10/14100 Posts in a week
    Haven't read any replies.

    Assuming you have no medical issues affecting your fertility... Then bloody travel first! On your income you could save hard for 6 months... Enough $$ to fund a 3 month holiday through Europe. I don't know why anyone your age who is in a financial position to travel and who has the travelling bug wouldn't do so before having kids.

    No matter what people say travelling with babies and kids isn't the same. It's bloody **** in comparison! Going to the beer halls if Munich and leaving by 6:30pm to change a dirty nappy...might as well stay home and go to the local club for a snitty.

    I know what you're probably thinking. You're ready for kids but you want to travel. If you travel first that means you don't really want kids as much as what you say you do... And if by some chance you are unable to have kids it will all be your fault. I call bull dust on that line of thinking. Use your time travelling to solidify your relationship with your hubby. Spend your evenings in French restaurants and days on the Thai coastline cuddling and romantisising about what type of parents you will be. Have the debates about whether they will go to a private school or a public school. God knows when you finally pop out a kid and are hormonal and sleep deprived you will need the camaraderie. And when bub is 13 years old you can pull out the photos from your travels and tell a family friendly version of what went on. I remember by Nanna pulling out photos of her overseas travels before she married and telling stories. I remember being so proud of her ambition and experiences. She was an awsome female role model.

    Bottom line if you are hesitating like this it means you want kids just not right this second.

  2. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to VicPark For This Useful Post:

    AppleIsleSMum  (14-03-2015),HollyGolightly81  (16-03-2015)

  3. #32
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    4,322
    Thanks
    1,552
    Thanked
    2,539
    Reviews
    10
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week

    Default Deciding to start a family... when?!

    I'd just like to add that you will get a fairly tainted views from bubhub posters.

    There is obviously a much higher percentage of people that had fertility issues on the forum, and also of stay at home parents that value family a lot more than the general population if you know what I mean.

    I started TTC at 31yo, Im now pregnant with #2 and got my BFP both times on first try. A lot of my closest friends had this chance too and they are all over 30yo. So it does happen.
    You really want to start TTC before 35yo though as that's when your fertility will drop significantly. Best would be to be done with the TTC before you're 35yo to be safe.

    The world isn't going anywhere but having kids will have you committed for life

    I'd really encourage you to take some time off and do one big trip with no kids in tow. I love my DS, I love traveling and won't stop for my kids as I want them to discover the world but traveling with or without kids would be like comparing going to the IMAX or watching a movie on your IPad. Very different experiences!

    However Europe is very easily doable with kids so Id do a big travel to somewhere a little bit more exotic.
    And yes, try to avoid and be pregnant for that trip. You might be sick, you won't be able to try all the beautiful food, and if something happens you'd want to have access to your local hospital/doctor rather than discover the foreign hospitals.

    That is what I'd tell a 27yo friend who hasn't been overseas anyway.

    Good luck deciding!
    Last edited by ExcuseMyFrench; 14-03-2015 at 21:11.

  4. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to ExcuseMyFrench For This Useful Post:

    babyla  (15-03-2015),HollyGolightly81  (16-03-2015),Lennon  (15-03-2015)

  5. #33
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Posts
    6,872
    Thanks
    5,195
    Thanked
    3,896
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I got married at 24, first bub at 26, then another at 28 and now due with my third at 31. My dh travels so much for work he flat out refuses to travel for fun. So I just got back from 4wks in India and the UAE by myself. It was freaking heaven. I've traveled extensively as a teenager with my family so I'm quite happy to travel with my kids as they grow up or take solo trips in peace.

    For dh and myself - our goal was to not be older parents. Dh in particular was adamant about a family before he was 30yrs old. Kinda failed there as he is 33 this year. I want to be done with child raising well before 50yo as I'm sure then I will have to pick up the care for my parents and inlaws 5-10yrs later. I'm seeing my colleagues who are in their early 50s travelling and having an absolute blast and know that's possible.

    It depends what you want to do and what your focus in life is. Btw. My brother is 30, his wife 31yo and they are on fertility treatment already. They are regretting they delayed their family. It's costing them a fortune.

  6. #34
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    my house
    Posts
    17,710
    Thanks
    1,392
    Thanked
    7,295
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    Only you can decide when you are ready.

    For me, I would not have been ready in my 20's to be a parent. I lived in London for 4 years teaching and travelling. I fell pregnant at 30, had my first at 31. I had already been to uni and had worked for 10 years in my profession. By the time I met my husband, we were both ready to settle down. We lived together for a while, then bought a house and I fell pregnant.

    We have a 6, 4, 2 year old and we have travelled with them overseas twice and a few family holidays here and there in Australia and it's just so different travelling with kids.

    ETA - we have had no fertility issues. I fell pregnant with my last at 34, had her at 35.
    Last edited by BigRedV; 14-03-2015 at 21:19.

  7. #35
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    12,710
    Thanks
    9,559
    Thanked
    12,691
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 9/1/15Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 7/11/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 3/10/14100 Posts in a week

    Default Deciding to start a family... when?!

    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia View Post
    . Btw. My brother is 30, his wife 31yo and they are on fertility treatment already. They are regretting they delayed their family. It's costing them a fortune.
    I think your brother and his wife must be awfully unlucky to be experiencing fertility problems that young considering fertility in females usually doesn't start going down the crapper until 35 . Can I ask - has a medical professional confirms the reason for their infertility? Is it age, environmental or biological related?

    I'm just grateful that I had my first at 34 after 6 months of trying (first month actually timing things) and my second at 37 after just one month if doing the bbt monitoring.

    I suppose my point is some people track along with the norm, some like your brother are unlucky, some like myself operate on the upper edge of normal verging on lucky. I hope the OP seeks independent medical advice. My guess is she will have enough time to travel and then have kids (if that is what she wants), but I'm No medical expert.
    Last edited by VicPark; 14-03-2015 at 21:32.

  8. #36
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    4,117
    Thanks
    2,910
    Thanked
    3,332
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    My guess is she will have enough time to travel and then have kids (if that is what she wants), but I'm No medical expert.
    Nobody is denying there's time to travel. It's just the amount of time available as differ on. I would plan a trip and take it within the year. That would make the OP pregnant at 28, giving birth at 29, which isn't young. I don't even think 27 is young to be honest.

    You're clearly not from an IVF world VP to think people who experience fertility issues at 30 are rare. Out of 20 people in my workgroup, 3 gave needed fertility assistance around 30.

    I know several people who have needed IVF in their mid 20s.

  9. #37
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,556
    Thanks
    1,602
    Thanked
    2,362
    Reviews
    6
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts

    Default Deciding to start a family... when?!

    I traveled a lot and lived overseas during my 20s, it was amazing! I always wanted to travel though so I know I would have regretted not going. However, we had fertility issues when we started TTC after getting married at 28. DD took a year to conceive and I had her at 30, DS was conceived through IVF and I had him at 33.

    Despite the issues we had TTC, I don't regret having my babies in my 30s. I'd do it all the same if I had my time again.

    If Asia interests you, maybe do a 10-day trip during the school holidays and see if the travel bug bites?
    Last edited by Cue; 14-03-2015 at 22:00.

  10. #38
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Posts
    2,009
    Thanks
    580
    Thanked
    175
    Reviews
    2
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Travel first your fertility won't dramatically change from 27 to 28 or 29

  11. #39
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    Perth
    Posts
    860
    Thanks
    949
    Thanked
    605
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by ExcuseMyFrench View Post
    However Europe is very easily doable with kids so Id do a big travel to somewhere a little bit more exotic.
    Yep, I agree. Much of South America and Asia are pre-kids places, but Europe is not too hard with kids. As @VicPark said, though, even in Europe kids still somewhat cramp your travelling style!

  12. #40
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Perth, Western Australia
    Posts
    1,914
    Thanks
    364
    Thanked
    1,502
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    My parents travelled young, before they had kids, and are very thankful they did. My dad suffered a very disabling stroke at only 51 when I was 19 (my younger sister still in high school) and whilst we'd done family holidays in Australia they wouldn't have done another big overseas trip until we were all grown up and moved out. He passed away a couple of years ago.

    So, I guess what I'm saying is you can't always count on travelling "when the kids are older". Obviously not everyone has such bad luck with their health, but you just never know!


 

Similar Threads

  1. Sperm Donor to start our family
    By jo-anne.36 in forum Adoption / Surrogacy
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 04-12-2014, 16:45
  2. Gay couple in Sydney looking to start our family :)
    By Andyandsam in forum Introductions
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 22-08-2014, 07:43

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
BAE The Label
Versatile, premium maternity wear that you will love throughout pregnancy and long after. Cleverly designed for for all stages of motherhood so that you can 'Just be you (+1)'.
sales & new stuffsee all
CarmelsBeautySecrets
Growing your own natural nails is easy. Years ago, I devised a simple and very effective technique which really helps boosts the nails' growth in as little as three days! And most importantly keeps them that way.
featured supporter
Cots on Bubhub
Looking to buy a cot or bassinet? :: Cot safety checklist :: Local or online nursery shops
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!