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  1. #11
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    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
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    I travelled in my early 20s (extensively) and dp has no desire at all to travel, so we decided to have a baby (I was 23, gave birth at 24) and now we have number 2 on the way (DP is 28).

    No regrets. I can't wait to travel with our kids when they are idler!

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  3. #12
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    We travelled heaps in our 20s and early 30s, had our first child in our mid 30s, and have travelled again since then with a little one in tow.

    I am really glad we did plenty of travel first, because I really enjoyed it. Travel is SO much easier and more spontaneous and exciting when you don't have young kids. They bring their own joys, but let's face it- you just can't do the same things and visit the same places with them around.

    If you really yearn to do some travelling, I'd recommend delaying having kidlets!

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    Lennon  (14-03-2015)

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    The world isnt going anywhere - your fertility on the other hand (well you just have to go into some other threads on here)... I wouldnt worry about what others have done/think etc. I gather that if you were the type to want to travel extensively you would have done so by now..? For me the choice is simple. What does your heart tell you?

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  7. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by KitiK View Post
    The world isnt going anywhere - your fertility on the other hand (well you just have to go into some other threads on here)... I wouldnt worry about what others have done/think etc. I gather that if you were the type to want to travel extensively you would have done so by now..? For me the choice is simple. What does your heart tell you?
    This is precisely what I worry about KitiK! I am scared that we will miss the boat with our fertility if we leave it too long. I know I'm only 27 now but we want to have more than 1 child, and you never know what fertility issues you will run into. I love kids more than anything (built my career around my love for children!) and it's my strongest life's desire!

    Having said that though, I do have doubts and wonder if we should book a trip before we start... which would mean posting TTC for a year or so! I'm so torn!

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    I've travelled to Europe before kids and also when our first was about 1 (as part of an around the world trip). While I think already having travel experience made the option of travelling with bub less daunting, at 32 I was over the whole backpacker experience. We did stay in hostels a lot as many are also very family friendly though.

    I definitely never saw having kids as an end to travelling, but we don't expect to have it all (eg. Big house, private schools, travel, cars etc). Something has to give and we have prioritised travel over home ownership and private schooling.

    I didn't have my 1st until 32 as I had to get rid of Mr. Wrong and find Mr. Right first. We wanted a 4 year gap but ended up with a 5.5 year gap due to miscarriages. My 2nd has been a great baby but a terrible sleeper, so any plans for a 3rd had to be shelved as I couldn't have handled another one so soon. He's almost 2 now and I'm almost 40. If I was even 2-3 years younger then I would feel like we could take our time and have another decent age gap (which I like). But that's not really an option, it's sort of now of never due to my age and I'm worried it will end up being never as we both still don't feel ready yet to go through it all again.

    So from my experience, having kids younger will give you more options with age gaps and the spread in ages has made it easier for us to keep travelling after kids.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lennon View Post
    This is precisely what I worry about KitiK! I am scared that we will miss the boat with our fertility if we leave it too long. I know I'm only 27 now but we want to have more than 1 child, and you never know what fertility issues you will run into. I love kids more than anything (built my career around my love for children!) and it's my strongest life's desire!

    Having said that though, I do have doubts and wonder if we should book a trip before we start... which would mean posting TTC for a year or so! I'm so torn!
    @Lennon, I had my 1st baby at 28 (too old in my opinion - we wanted to do everything the "right way" ie: house paid, cars paid, good jobs, travelled, career etc) and ended up with secondary infertility. 5 years later (lots of money/stress and heartache) IVF gave us our #2 daughter. We are about to have #3 (in 18 days!) a son from a FET. I am over 35 now and wish I had have done it all earlier (hindsight - and only my personal experience). Its amazing how quickly your fertility declines between 30-35 and again over 35. Travelling with kids, or when you are older is just as fulfilling as doing it when you're young. I love travelling with my kids and making memories for them too x

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    Lennon you have asked a great question with billions of answers none of which would be wrong. It really comes down to what you value in life and what is on your bucket list I guess. As many have said, there is nothing wrong with travelling with kids but some people choose to before. Some people choose not to at all.

    I personally did not want kids too early in life. I absolutely want kids and always have though. Sometimes I am painfully clucky but my reasons for wanting to wait were because

    1) I wanted me time to travel and enjoy "winging" it. I could pick up and move around to wherever I wanted, whenever I wanted and didn't have to think of anyone else and how it might affect them or if where I was going was child friendly.

    2) I didn't want to peak too early. I've seen it happen with a bunch of friends that had children when we left school. They really wanted to have babies and did. Now that others are starting to in that same age group (mid to late 20's), they are finding that their babies are all grown up and almost out of primary school. Some have decided to now go again for another but I don't know if I would do that.

    As far as I'm concerned I've had years to look forward to holding my baby for the first time and I don't want to know that moment has already come and gone. DP and I are aiming for 2 LO's in order to provide the same quality of life we had growing up. I don't want those moments to come and go too fast. Then what will we do? Lol.

    Everyone is different and only you will know when it's right for you and what order you want to do things

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  14. #18
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    I agonised over this question for about 4 years. We went back and forth but never felt like the timing was quite right. DH then decided he wanted another career so that put us on hold for a little while while he studied again. 3 years ago we decided on a whim to rent our house out and go to Europe. 5 months later we were gone and we spend 4.5 months traveling Europe. We've also done a bit of SE Asia and Japan and another Europe trip prior to this. We came home and I started a phd then a year in I got some pretty crappy health news so we just decided to go for it. DS is 6 months old and I had him at 29. It wasn't the "ideal" time study wise but for my own health it was (ps no time is right, you can always find another reason to put it off!).

    If you want to travel now do a little bit before you have kids. We still intend to travel (hopefully end of this year again) but it will be very different to our previous trips. I will never regret doing our big trip, and I'm glad we did it prior to DS. But if you aren't really interested in it like we were/are then I can't see why you should put of having a baby. I'll never regret that either!

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    Try why you're travelling. Or just travel for a short time and then start trying. If travelling is on your radar even in the slightest I would give it a bit of a go before having kids. You're 27 so travelling for a couple of months is not going to have an impact on your fertility. Kids can have a pretty big impact on travel so decide whether you want the experience of travelling without kids - you can always travel with kids after but the only time you can do it without is before you have them.

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  18. #20
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    I agree with Kitk. To be honest the time for travel is 18-25. If you haven't done it by now you probably don't really care. I have a friend who kept putting off having a baby "after this trip, after blahs wedding, after the next trip" etc. the her husband left her for another woman and it's doubtful she will have a baby as she's now 36, single and very very bitter.

    My sister had no eggs left at 35 and needed a donor egg. She got lucky with an egg from my other sister and had a 3yo. But after 3years of trying for another, many miscarriages and well over 100k in fertility treatment she's calling it.

    You need to think about how many kids you want. Let's say your fertility is gone at 38, which is when most women's decline. You're 27 now. If you got pregnant now the baby would be 28 when born. Plenty of time to pop out a second. But if you want 4 kids with a 3 year gap between each one then you're really running out of time.

    By all means take a mini break to Europe. Just don't dilly dally .

    Sorry is IVF women are a pushy bunch!

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