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  1. #41
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    I have taught my kids to hit punch kick bite etc.. to escape from assault or abduction. I think it a important part of general safety. They have never been the aggressor. My d's has bitten a much older boy (a bully) who had in a head lock and was punching him. I totally agreed it was the right thing to do. He was able to escape and get help.

  2. #42
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    Good on her and good on her mother for challenging the acceptance of sexual assault.
    Sure another way would be better to deal with violence against her but she'd already tried that - it didn't work and she wasn't protected.

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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    I have really mixed feelings over this. On one hand, she asked him to stop multiple times and he did not, to the point he undid her bra. She asked for help from the teacher and told to ignore it (wtf? ). It didn't seem to be a sustained attack which went on for mins, I'm reading two hits in quick succession. May well have been a knee jerk reaction. Part of me struggles to feel sorry for the boy as he was told to stop and was sexually assaulting her.

    But then violence shouldn't be the answer. I guess she could have got up and left the classroom... which she would have got in trouble for... but then she got in trouble for assault anyway.

    So I really don't know where I stand tbh. If it was my daughter, I would have ruthlessly defended her like this mum did, but in private probably talked to her about more appropriate measures.
    You sum this up well. I think many posters have valid comments and thoughts in this situation, but I just can't condone violence.

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    Quote Originally Posted by LoveLivesHere View Post
    I have taught my kids to hit punch kick bite etc.. to escape from assault or abduction. I think it a important part of general safety. They have never been the aggressor. My d's has bitten a much older boy (a bully) who had in a head lock and was punching him. I totally agreed it was the right thing to do. He was able to escape and get help.
    See, I completely agree with your son's approach in that situation. I've done similar myself.

    It's different to the situation with this girl though, as she wasn't physically restrained. She had other options which she chose not to use.

    Again, I wouldn't blame a 15 year old girl for making that choice...she was in an awful situation, she wasn't assisted by those who should have helped her. The boy deserves full consequences for his actions....still doesn't mean avoidable violence ought to be justified by adults though.

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  6. #45
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    if my boys do that to a girl if she doesnt slap them one I damn well will,

    theyve no right to do it and they deserve a bloody nose for it, that teacher needs reprimanding

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  8. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThenThereWereThree View Post
    if my boys do that to a girl if she doesnt slap them one I damn well will,

    theyve no right to do it and they deserve a bloody nose for it, that teacher needs reprimanding
    I had very that conversation with my son today.

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    Maybe she thought this was the only way of stopping it for good. Bullies dont listen to please or a stern talking to. No one else was taking her seriously and now they are but only because her mum backed her up and pointed out to the clueless school that her daughter was in fact being sexually assaulted. If her mum had admitted that her daughter was at fault in any way i bet the boys actions would have been downplayed greatly and the girl punished. In todays rape culture i dont feel that admittance of fault is really an option in these situations.

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    Default What do you in this situation.

    Students do not have 'walking away' as an option in class. Firstly, if she just left the room she would get in trouble for that. The teacher has already told her he's not supporting her so as for moving elsewhere in the class (if she was even allowed to do so, I don't generally let students wander around my classroom), there's nothing to say the boy won't follow her or that the teacher won't tell her to return to her seat. Secondly, why should SHE miss the lesson because a boy is repeatedly harassing her? I know that she would have been hauled out after punching him anyway, but why is the onus on her to leave the classroom? She has every right to be there without being harassed.

    And having your bra actually undone in class would be very intimidating. All of a sudden having your boobs unsecured in a classroom of teenage boys with a male teacher - no wonder she felt vulnerable/ threatened and lashed out.

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    If I put my 15 year old self in this girl's shoes, I have little doubt I would have snapped and resorted to opening up a can of whoop a$$ on that sleazy worm of a boy.

    And you know what my mum would have done? Exactly the same thing as the mum did in that piece!

    I have zero, I repeat ZERO sympathy for this boy. I think sometimes a bully needs a wake up call, and if that involves a victim getting physical to defend their personal boundaries when they are being assaulted, so be it.

    I'm disgusted that the teacher brushed off what happened and told the girl to ignore it. No. How dare they allow a student to touch someone like that and tell the victim to ignore it

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    This reminds me a bit of that 'bullying fail' video from a few years back. I pretty much thought that kid was justified too.


 

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