I've had a clingy, whingy teething bubba all weekend.. thankfully she's still sleeping through. Had a lovely meal with friends last night and a huge lazy day today
I've had a long day and DF has just left to work away for the week. DS1 is saying he doesn't want his friend to visit tomorrow because he doesn't want to share his toys and DS2 has been jumping and running around like a maniac. If I had half his energy I would feel amazing! I don't want to deal with DS1and his phases of not liking someone. I just don't understand it when he asked me for days if his friend could come over.
They are both in bed now and I just want to veg in front of the tv.
And I know it's a phase. It just feels like such an eff you when I fought so hard to keep this baby at the expense of my marriage to see the bond they have and to feel like I'm nothing special. It feels like everything we went through was so futile now that they have such a loving relationship. But it is what it is, it's what I fought for, and I'm alone again so I will make the best of it all x
Big loves, harvs. You're such an amazing mother to your boy and he'll know. It might not seem like it right now but one day he will realise how all encompassing your love for him is.
I'm ok. Actually a bit cr@p because my back has been out for the last two weeks and I can't get seen by my osteo (I know a bit weirdy beardy but it's the only thing that helps) until the 10th so I have a constant massive headache and jaw ache and my neck hurts and my back hurts. Ooh and I'm pre menstrual and my cranky pants are giving me a massive wedgy. I'm super fun to be around right now!
I'm doing internal backflips tonight. A job has been advertised that I intend on applying for. Yay!
My tummy is in knots though! The thought of trying to find care for dd already has me feeling sick. After what I've been through with the boys in the past I just... Wow. I'm only now realising that its no wonder I haven't really pushed myself to get back in the workforce earlier.
I am eating a punnet of fresh raspberries and dipping them in melted chocolate. Surely the good outweighs the bad.....
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