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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by BbBbBh View Post
    Asked with the utmost respect: does she happily have sleepovers at mates houses, grandparents, family or friends of yours?
    She has only had a couple of sleepovers with friends and yes she was fine with those.

    She doesnt really get a chance to sleep at grandparents mostly because if we go out my parents come and mind them at our house cause their apartment is tiny.

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by yadot View Post
    I have no experience with my children being like this but when I was her age I HATED sleepovers. I would dread the different place, new noises etc. I don't know when it went away or why I just remember feeling so anxious sleeping anywhere other than my own bed. Maybe it could be something like this?
    Yes you may be right as when talking to her she repeatedly expresses that she just likes to sleep at her own house & wants to be sleeping in the same house as me at night time

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    Could there be more to this than she's telling you?

  4. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by hopeful1986 View Post
    Could there be more to this than she's telling you?
    Ive had conversations with her over the last few weeks and cant find anything to suggest theres anything else.

  5. #25
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    Could it just be plain old refusal?

    Plenty of kids go through it in relation to school, food, etc.
    It just seems more... daunting? (I don't know if that's the right word) when it involves visitation.

    If she really does like spending time with her dad, maybe have a chat to her about how this is the only way she will see him? That if she doesn't go to his place for X time, then she won't see him. If you can get your ex on board to try it (do a 'lead-up' for 3 weeks about how it is dad's turn on X day, talk about it regularly, etc. If she refuses, even once, dad doesn't turn up.).... just to see if she 'gets it'. IYKWIM?

    We did this with DSS when he was refusing to transition (from mums to ours, ours to mums, school, etc) and he learned after a few months that he was the one losing out.

    ETA: granted it could take longer in your situation, as at the time we saw the kids every week.

  6. #26
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    My DD is exactly the same, as I posted when you first started this thread.

    She has since been diagnosed with anxiety. It mostly centres around her dad. I am hoping that some of the strategies she is/will be taught will help her to deal with going (even though I do admit she has a cr@p time there and that will never change).

    Have you thought about this being a possibility with your DD?

  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by CMF View Post
    My DD is exactly the same, as I posted when you first started this thread.

    She has since been diagnosed with anxiety. It mostly centres around her dad. I am hoping that some of the strategies she is/will be taught will help her to deal with going (even though I do admit she has a cr@p time there and that will never change).

    Have you thought about this being a possibility with your DD?
    Yes i am def thinking its an anxiety thing.
    Her teacher has also noticed that coming up to a weekend she is meant to be going to her dads theres a shift in her behaviour at school to anxious/emotional traits.

    Ive been speaking to the principal this week and submitting forms for her to have some sessions with the school councillor.

    Its so hard cause i know she likes to see him she just doesnt like going that far away anymore - i think she is realising how far it actually is these days.
    She expresses that she just want to be at home to play with her things & have play dates with her friends etc instead of spending her w'nd visiting her dad

  8. #28
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    Haven't read other replies..

    Maybe try once a month.


 

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