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  1. #1
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    Default Toddler & older sibling fighting

    We have dd1 and ds8. They fight. A lot.
    Mostly because dd1 thinks everything is hers and decides ds8 can't touch it. Mum, the dog, the shopping trolley, her cot, a couch cushion etc.
    It seems more to me than usually toddler tanties re sharing toys.
    She scratches, bites, slaps and generally is awful to her brother. Even when he tries to give her a hug or help her pass a toy, sometimes he is just minding his own business and she will run up and hit him.

    She does laugh and think he is hilarious. They dance together and she is happy to have him play with her. But she gets very possessive over strange things and he gets beaten in the process.

    How do I stop it? I try moving her away and saying no. Ask her to be gentle and praise her when she is. We tried ignoring it and avoiding the situations bit it doesn't seem to make much difference.

    I had them both in tears yesterday at the shops, cause dd1 got asked to stop slapping her bother when he came near the trolley and Ds8 didn't like that his sister doesn't like him and he gets hurt all the time.

    Help!!

  2. #2
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    I have no advice, but my 3 y/o niece is the same with her 8 y/o brother. Anything he has, she wants. If he has his shoes on, she screams at him to take them off. If he has his shoes off, she screams at him to put them on. She takes his toys, books, messes up his Lego. She gets cross if he sits next to Mum or Dad. They are "her Mummy and Daddy". It drives my sister crazy. She is totally at her wits end. She makes sure that her or her DH try and spend some one on one time with him away from his sister, just so he gets some nice 'down time' without being harassed!

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    Dd3 (2.5) is similar towards dd2 (4.5). Dd3 becomes extremely violent towards dd2, often dd2 wont even have done anything, she could just be sitting watching tv and dd3 will start laying into her or biting and kicking her. Dd3 rarely does it with our other 2 (who are 7.5 and 9 months). Nothing I have tried makes any difference, dd3 is such a defiant kid and just laughs when I tell her off. I have started putting her in her room now when she does it, she has a baby gate on the door so she can't get out.

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