+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 18
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    9,574
    Thanks
    1,327
    Thanked
    1,477
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts

    Angry So frustrated, so over it.

    I am having a vent. I really need one cause I just feel like I am going to explode.
    Every day I am challenged with a child who wants to just throw and destroy everything he touches. 3/4's of my house is sealed off by baby gates to prevent him from destroying the things in the room, and once that is sealed off he goes to the next room. Items have been removed. My bathroom has no toys, has no open displays of bottles, glasses, tooth brushes or tooth paste. But he still finds something in there.. like he pulled the drain cover out and started spreading the crap in the pipe everywhere. And it happens in a short space of time. I could be washing the dishes, reloading the washing machine. Hell going to the toilet! Writing this message... (4 times removed him from the toilet)
    He eats everything....
    Throws everything..
    Is indifferent and doesn't understand anything I say to him. So it's an impulse just keep doing what he is doing. I can't child lock the doors, my eldest needs to get in to them.
    I can not do anything, and I just want to scream. It's his age, his mental age, his development age, which has created .. well this monster. I don't want to call him that, but it's all I can come to in my head. He has tunnel vision, he has selective hearing, he doesn't respond to his own name... He doesn't notice me at all, so saying no means diddly squat in his world.
    No amount of redirection, finding items that might hold his attention.
    "hey heres this" he will just take it with him or throw it, where ever he is going for his next course of action.
    All I can do is hope he improves. I want to cry, I want to run away. I feel like the worst mother there is..

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2015
    Location
    Rochedale, QLD
    Posts
    300
    Thanks
    366
    Thanked
    301
    Reviews
    0
    Awards:
    Funniest Caption
    Hi White Marge-

    Wow it sounds like you're going through such a tough time hugs!

    Would I be right in guessing he is 2-3 years old?

    I have a 2yo ATM who is very much the same! Impulsive, destructive and curious of everything he can pull out/spill/ rip up/throw etc.

    It is absolutely exhausting!!!

    I also have older kids who need access to things which makes child proofing an extra tough challenge.

    The only thing I can think of is to lock up what you can and gate off what you can! It's a bit of a pain, but it does release at least some of the havoc. I have my 2yos bedroom gated at night (because otherwise like h*ll would he be staying in his room at night and going to sleep) plus it prevents him getting up in the early am before I'm awake and destroying the place!

    I started with some adhesive "click up" locks for the fridge etc (some of his favourite activities include pulling out fruit, biting it, leaving it somewhere random for me to find then going back and repeating, spilling milk (purposefully), smearing salad dressing throughout the fridge and cracking eggs on the floor and other such savoury (pun intended) activities )

    Of course the click locks were figured out in a depressingly short amount of time so now I've moved onto a butch metal padlock with a key that I installed with strong adhesive metal hinges (lol) these can all be found at bunnings warehouse.

    Is your little one in daycare or kinder at all? One of the reasons he may be becoming so restless (beyond that it's unfortunately quite a normal curiosity driven behaviour in small kids) is that he's seeking extra stimulation-

    As parents we all do our best to provide this but we also have to take care of so many other things it can be hard not to get busy- plus it seems sometimes within moments of distraction (like you said with going to the loo etc.) they can be off and into something new (gah!)

    If he's not already- it might help to get him enrolled in some sort of education based daycare or kinder program not only will this give you a much deserved break- but it will also provide him with a good outlet a couple times a week to explore in a completely childproof environment

    Maybe you're already doing this?

    I hope this helps and I'm sure you're already Doing all the right things. It's hard work being mum!

    I feel your pain- I really do. They do grow out of it though- unfortunately it's just a time thing. :/ sometimes all I can do is just have a quick cry and hope for a better tomorrow.. So you're not alone- and any advice people here give you is probably things you've already thought of tried- so te main thing to remember is we can definitely relate. I hope you can find some relief with him soon and big, big hugs in the meantime.

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to KiWolf For This Useful Post:

    White Mage  (17-02-2015)

  4. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Newcastle
    Posts
    2,287
    Thanks
    967
    Thanked
    936
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I here you. DS is 3.5 now and has only just settled down a bit with the help of Omega3 supplements, removing artificial colours and preservatives from his diet and limiting TV. Now he plays with his toys, still touches everything he possible can but is a lot easier to manage/redirect. We still have 4 safety gates up in the house though.

  5. The Following User Says Thank You to WiseOldOwl For This Useful Post:

    White Mage  (17-02-2015)

  6. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Posts
    2,206
    Thanks
    135
    Thanked
    608
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Must be so hard. Have you had him checked by an ENT Dr? I only ask because after my son had his tonsils, adenoids and grommets done he was a different kid.

  7. The Following User Says Thank You to sweetpeamummy For This Useful Post:

    White Mage  (17-02-2015)

  8. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    9,574
    Thanks
    1,327
    Thanked
    1,477
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by sweetpeamummy View Post
    Must be so hard. Have you had him checked by an ENT Dr? I only ask because after my son had his tonsils, adenoids and grommets done he was a different kid.
    This is our possible choice of action. He has congestion. Lots of it in his face.
    He had heaps of infections last year. But after a 4 month reprieve, he has just got his next one, right now believe it or not. I wouldn't of noticed he was ill. He has a very high threshold to pain, and his bad breath tipped me off.
    I discussed with the Dr today about it, and we do have another hearing test for the start of April. His hearing tests in the past have shown, he can hear perfectly but due to being congested, there is no movement in the ear drums. So if he passes the test but still has no movement, we will be getting our referral to the ENT Dr right after.

    KiWolf - He now goes to Daycare 3x a week. Which gives me some breathing space. My Dh is also looking into buy another baby gate to seal off the little hallway to the toilet and bathroom. It literally leaves him with just the lounge and his room to play in. He still can not reach the lock on our pantry, and has no interest in the fridge.
    Ds2 is a very curious case, as he seems like a stimulator seeker, but he is an avoider... he just has very high thresholds. So he may continue to seek out something, but it will be something he ends up not wanting... it's complicated, but sadly he is ultimately going to be a lot of work.
    The other issue is, it changes all the time, before he figured he could throw stuff, he chewed stuff... He even had a kiddie chew toy for a while, but we could never figure out what exactly he was actually after from the toys, or what kind of chew toy he needed...
    Then he went through a stage where he wanted to be upside down and seeked out rough play, ALL. THE. TIME. I couldn't wash the dishes without him hanging off me.

  9. The Following User Says Thank You to White Mage For This Useful Post:

    KiWolf  (17-02-2015)

  10. #6
    Join Date
    Feb 2015
    Location
    Rochedale, QLD
    Posts
    300
    Thanks
    366
    Thanked
    301
    Reviews
    0
    Awards:
    Funniest Caption

    Default So frustrated, so over it.

    Hmmm, I agree the ENT Dr. may be worth looking into.

    You're right it certainly sounds like he's seeking out different tastes/textures/stimulation- perhaps a sensory issue could be behind it too? A paediatrician could help figure this out.

    I really feel for you because I know how hard it can be, and how exhausting! My 2yo is very restless as well - all three of mine were between the ages of 2-3yo.

    I hope you find some answers/solutions and most importantly some relief soon- you must be so emotionally/mentally and physically drained xo

  11. The Following User Says Thank You to KiWolf For This Useful Post:

    White Mage  (17-02-2015)

  12. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    9,574
    Thanks
    1,327
    Thanked
    1,477
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by KiWolf View Post
    Hmmm, I agree the ENT Dr. may be worth looking into.

    You're right it certainly sounds like he's seeking out different tastes/textures/stimulation- perhaps a sensory issue could be behind it too? A paediatrician could help figure this out.

    I really feel for you because I know how hard it can be, and how exhausting! My 2yo is very restless as well - all three of mine were between the ages of 2-3yo.

    I hope you find some answers/solutions and most importantly some relief soon- you must be so emotionally/mentally and physically drained xo
    We are currently seeing an O.T and Speech Therapist through our E.I Service. And they have been trying to find ways to help him out, within their power of course. They helped us through some our darker times with DS1.
    We are currently focusing on his communication, so mainly eye contact type things, and later be able to implement the communication PEDS program. If we can get him to a point where he wants to be able to communicate somehow, it may make it easier figuring out what he wants. And maybe be able to help him a little better with his needs.
    The ENT has been something I have asked the PD in the past, but he has never been overly concerned with this side of things. Cause funnily enough DS2 is never poorly when we see him. So Yeah, I am going to do it through my GP instead, and get my referral.

  13. The Following User Says Thank You to White Mage For This Useful Post:

    KiWolf  (17-02-2015)

  14. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    934
    Thanks
    303
    Thanked
    209
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Huge huge hugs first off, I feel for you big time. I feel a bit the same and have frustrations but my DS cannot walk yet although he crawls and does it speedy. He's figured out how to open doors just the last few weeks too, he'll get on his knees and reach for door handles and open somehow.

    I also have older children which really does make child proofing tricky.

    Like your child my DS does not understand 'no' or what he's doing is wrong.

    He was trying to pull the tv off tv cabinet so had to get a new one so tv is now high up but unfortunately it has glass doors for a display type cabinet and doors to put dvds and stuff in, he rips them open and bangs his hands on glass, gulp lol...

    I don't have an awful lot of advice but what previous posters have said sounds good, daycare and the like.

    My DS who is 2 goes in a high chair for time out sometimes. Sounds bad but sometimes it's good for settling him down, some food on the tray maybe some tv or music just to calm him. It's a comfy one with cushiony seat. Sounds horrible like I'm a bad mumma lol, but it works to calm him sometimes and stop him if he's in a destroying type mood, just 10, 20 mins just for timeout and gives me a break also.

  15. The Following User Says Thank You to zoz For This Useful Post:

    White Mage  (17-02-2015)

  16. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    9,574
    Thanks
    1,327
    Thanked
    1,477
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    What I have done today...

    Collect all the shoes from behind the couch, that Ds2 threw behind there.
    Lost a 3rd of my family photo fridge magnets behind the oven. Which by the way he was clever enough to take one of the chairs from his kiddy table to help him reach.
    Pull him out of the bath tub 4 times and repaired 2 baby gates.
    Stopped him from washing his hands in the toilet twice.
    And had to close the front door, because he has figured out how to unlock the extension door.

  17. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2015
    Location
    Rochedale, QLD
    Posts
    300
    Thanks
    366
    Thanked
    301
    Reviews
    0
    Awards:
    Funniest Caption
    Ugh it is so hard sometimes. The lock adhesive came off my fridge today - DS3 is still to come home from kindy - freaking out!


 

Similar Threads

  1. I get soo frustrated he just doesn't understand. .
    By RuffledPansy in forum General Chat
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 11-11-2014, 20:21
  2. Frustrated ... :(
    By kuz78au in forum Breastfeeding Support
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 22-07-2014, 06:41

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Shapland Swim Schools
Shapland's at participating schools offer free baby orientation classes once a month - no cost no catches. Your baby will be introduced to our "natural effects" orientation program develop by Shapland's over 3 generations, its gentle and enjoyable.
sales & new stuffsee all
Wendys Music School Melbourne
Wondering about Music Lessons? FREE 30 minute ASSESSMENT. Find out if your child is ready! Piano from age 3 years & Guitar, Singing, Drums, Violin from age 5. Lessons available for all ages. 35+ years experience. Structured program.
Use referral 'bubhub' when booking
featured supporter
ProSwim
ProSwim runs learn to swim classes for babies, children and adults. Our indoor centre in Plympton Park has lessons all year round, including school holidays. We also offer outdoor programs during the summer months (Oct-Mar) at Rostrevor college.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!