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  1. #581
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    @ttc1981 sorry you have to join us on this sucky journey.

    I know how you feel with people asking if you are pregnant etc. I have a friend and almost everytime somehow she manages to say ... I can't wait for you to have kids, your babies will be cute. Or something like that. Sometimes I just feel like meeting with her when DH can come in the hope she doesn't bring it up.

    I have only told one close friend and she has fertility issues too and will never have kids so she knows what it is like.

    Only tonight I saw a picture of a friend saying she is 25 weeks pregnant and my heart is literally broken and feel like crying.

    Sometimes it just feels like everyone around me has no problems and makes me wonder ... what did we do wrong to deserve this?

    Sorry ... am in a sad mood since I read it on facebook.

    Needless to say I didn't like the picture. I usually don't like any pregnancy announcements at all.

  2. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Malak For This Useful Post:

    Kookii  (23-07-2015),MGC Bertie  (13-07-2015),ttc1981  (14-07-2015)

  3. #582
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    @Malak: sorry to hear. I was so depressed last year and deliberately delaying to transfer our last bio embie. At some point, my counselor asked me when because she saw that i needed to cross to the other side of the fence in order to move on. I did it after 8 months of break between my chemical and the transfer. I was really sad when it didn't work but i felt relieved that i could finally move on. The moving on part actually cured my sadness and depression without needing the medication. I suspect it would be the same for you.

    I stayed away from friends who won't stop asking. I even did that with my family and relatives. We need to protect ourselves. Luckily we didn't tell anyone that we are TTC. I only told few close friends about IVF at the beginning and i regretted it. It is stressful enough and the expectation of them to hear something after the transfer is just not worth the further stress.

  4. #583
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    @ttc1981 welcome and sorry to hear that you've had to join us here.

    I have been on this forum for 18 months. We first found out my DH had non-obstructive Azoospermia in November 2013 and all of 2014 was dealing with it. We had three SA, all the bloods, a TESA, TESE and finally a mTESE timed with a cycle of IVF and donor sperm as a back up in Nov of 2014. The end result was having to use the donor sperm but at least we exhausted all the avenues. We opted for known donor so my DH could have a genetic tie and now very excited to be successful in our second cycle of IVF and just about to enter the third trimester with a bub due in Oct. Once the baby is here the journey from go to woe will have been two years and that's quick compared to some of us on this journey. Good luck stay strong and remember to love one another. It's a crappy, awful diagnosis but it does make you stronger.

    X

  5. #584
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    @bbhope the friend is one of my best friends. Sometimes I just feel like sending a text and saying .... just so you know we can't have kids, I don't want to talk about why and I don't want to talk about it at all.

    But I am not sure how that would go down....

    It is funny how some people's pregnancies hit you the hardest. I have only cried so much with only one other one. The hard part is trying to keep it hidden from DH because I don't want him to feel bad.

    Sometimes I feel like just defriending anyone who annouces that they are pregnant.

  6. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Malak For This Useful Post:

    Kookii  (23-07-2015),MGC Bertie  (14-07-2015)

  7. #585
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    Hi everyone,
    just introducing myself, this is my first post
    My DH was diagnosed with non-obstructive azoospermia a few months ago, and it has been a terrible journey, one which I never expected we would have to go through (who does I suppose!?).
    We have done one round of IVF/ICSI with TESA, they found sperm, but they were not moving, and we had very poor fertilisation rates and poor quality embryos. Nothing to freeze.
    My question is, is this a normal occurrence for NOA, and does that mean we will never have success and have to use donor sperm?
    Thank you in advance!

  8. #586
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    What diagnosis did they give for DH azoo? The fact that they found sperms with TESA alone is very good news and more like an obstructive to me. How many sperms did they find? Did they have enough to freeze?

    The answer to your question is that if they find many sperms, the next step is to do TESE, which is invasive but they normally can get better quality sperms that way as I understand TESA is random select samples.

    I think allykat dp has obstructive. He recently got good sperms from TESE. Same poor quality result as yours with TESA. They have few to freeze and waiting for FET so not sure the outcome yet.

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    Lively  (13-07-2015)

  10. #587
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    Hi bbhope, thank you so much for responding to my query
    They think it's a sperm production problem, as there were no obvious blockages, hormone issues or history of illness etc.
    The diagnostic TESA found 50 sperm, 7-8 of which were twitching (which they froze).
    The second TESA was for our IVF and they didn't tell me how many they found, but the sperm were not moving and there was only enough to fertilise my 9 eggs.
    Not sure why the quality decreased so much the second time around, but it's very concerning

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    ttc1981  (14-07-2015)

  12. #588
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    @Malak: I have become distance with some of my good friends. A few know the first part of the story because I was so in shocked about DH azoo. In the end, I realised that they simply don't understand. they were being nosy. In the end, I am glad that I cut off the conversation given now we r doing donor and we don't wish any friend to know.

    I told the friend, who asked every time we met for coffee, that I would let her know when it happens or I shall see etc. when She still didnt get the hint, I stopped going out with her and stopped communicating. she got preg last year anyway and I was busy travelling around the world for work. I just met her last week and she finally found out that I am preg. And she didn't even feel rude to ask if we r planning to have a second. WTF?! I am guessing she didn't realise it is rude any of these questions given that it is part of her culture. Knowing her "style", I am glad that I didn't tell her anything about IVF. Sure, there are some preg and baby announcement affected me more than others. I cried alone so much and actually wish DH saw it. Again, he is not the most expressive type. I was told to be on anti depressant few times. As I said, the moving on part really got me over everything. Certainly, a very positive and supportive FS.

    I can see that you are struggling with the karma part. I was brought up knowing good thing returns to good ppl. I will just say that there is no such thing. DH is a super nice guy and I do no harm to ppl. Bin Laden killed many and he has N number of kids. Life is not fair and this azoo journey sucks.

  13. #589
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    Default Azoospermia #2

    @Lively: have they done any genetic test on DH? I know some NOA men have good outcome in term of number of sperms because they aren't the most severe azoo. Mainly genetic related. The fact that they r so many and twitching, It is late maturation arrest. The best kind you could hope for. It is unusual and could be due to lifestyle.

    My DH has late maturation arrest but the outcome for him is extremely poor because the balls were damaged due to other medical condition. That means only small pockets are actually producing sperms. The Dr obviously found one pocket for us but he did say the sperm was abnormal looking. The lab found 3 motiles one at the lab. One super good looking embie and the other ok looking. Both chemical pregnancies.

    I think there is still hope in your case. Can they do DNA fragmentation test on some of the frozen ones? It seems so easy to get sperms from TESA so I won't think it is a bad idea to get that tested. As I mentioned, TESE would be the next step to open up the testes and look for some healthy looking pockets and do IVF along with it. I am sure that they would have some to freeze so he doesn't have to do it again.

    Take a bunch vits. It is important not only to have healthy sperms but also eggs.

    Edit: oh. My DH did mtese. Extremely invasive procedure. so there is no second chance. If it is TESA and easy to get sperms on a random sample, I would have pushed for another one Unless the DNA fragmentation test comes back abnormally high percentage.
    Last edited by bbhope; 13-07-2015 at 23:55.

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    Lively  (31-03-2016)

  15. #590
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    Wow guys your information is amazing... So I'm not sure who but someone recommended Dr T at Concepts as he is more advanced in sperm collection... Is that correct because we can get into him heaps earlier? I have had a pretty down night myself and just feel blah about everything... I run a business and in the middle of a big move and I just can't get motivated... Even my partner has said I'm a lot more ****ed off at the world and I don't think that is a good thing. Going to see my GP Wednesday and asking to get referred to a counsellor any recommendations?
    So we really need to get all the bloods and everything done do you all know exactly what needs testing so we can get the ball rolling... My partner knows his anxious I am about this so he is on the ball I just need to stop taking my frustrations out on him


 

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