Single Mum to be needing advice

[bubzygirl1325]

Well where do I start, I was with my babys Father for about a year and a half then we split up and he started liking another girl anyway fast forward 6months this other girl fell pregnant to another guy and my ex and i started sleeping together again just before he left for the navy anyway the last time we slept together i ended up falling pregnant and the same weekend we slept together he ended up getting engaged to that girl he had feelings for mind me she got engaged to him while she had a boyfriend. when i told my ex that i was pregnant he was shocked at first but was really good about everything was going to be ther for our child ect well right up until he told his newly finance. then he told me he wanted nothing to do with me or bubs and this completed gutted me. I didnt get to speak to him for 5 months sue to him being in the navy until i rang him to speak to him two weeks ago.I found out that his fiance just had a little boy on the 16th Nov, (father not my ex another guy) she inst even putting the father of her child on the birth certificate. My ex and I have been able to have good convos on the phone the past few weeks but he still doesnt want anything to do with our child. Which i cant understand one bit as he is going to be a father figure to another mans child but not to his this make me angry is that wrongof me to feel like this??? I have been told just wait till he meets our bubs he will change his mind as having your own flesh and blood is different. Another thing because he is in the navy and just completeing his training him and his finance arnt even going to live together after he finishes training he will still live on base. Is it just me but if i was engaged to someone i would want to be with them and live with them no matter what.???? She lives at home with her parents and wont move out of brisbane.. weird.. Should i just leave all the hard stuff of trying to sort things out until after bubs is born or trying talking to him bout it all before hand. Very confusing I know but just had to write it all down i guess.

[Buddha Bubbas]

OMG what a mess

I have sent you a PM

[MissieK]

Huge hugs. Maybe you could get some counselling to sort out your own feelings first? From your post, it sounds like a very confusing time for you.

As far as not living together while engaged, my ex & I didn't live together until we were married, but then again, we didn't have any kids.

Melissa

[loopi1]

My experience has been a little similar. My Ds's father and I were friends for over a year and also housemates when I fell pregnant(was told I couldn't have kids) I was 7mths when I found out and he was with his new gf for 6mths. When I told him he had to tell his new gf and ever since then I haven't heard from him. Everyone kept telling me it was her that was stopping him, my DS is nearly 3 and he hasn't had anything to do with him but he has been a father figure to her daughter. You can't make people be involved with the kids, you can beg plead, cry and get angry but you can't make them. What you need to do is get on with your life and be as prepared as you can be physically and mentally for the birth of your miracle child. You need to be strong for this little bub who will be needing you to be there. Worry about that other stuff later. It's his loss.

Lots of to you

[motherlylove]

My experience has been a little similar. My Ds's father and I were friends for over a year and also housemates when I fell pregnant(was told I couldn't have kids) I was 7mths when I found out and he was with his new gf for 6mths. When I told him he had to tell his new gf and ever since then I haven't heard from him. Everyone kept telling me it was her that was stopping him, my DS is nearly 3 and he hasn't had anything to do with him but he has been a father figure to her daughter. You can't make people be involved with the kids, you can beg plead, cry and get angry but you can't make them. What you need to do is get on with your life and be as prepared as you can be physically and mentally for the birth of your miracle child. You need to be strong for this little bub who will be needing you to be there. Worry about that other stuff later. It's his loss.

Lots of to you

I think you hit the nail on the head