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  1. #31
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    I woukd make the move to a new place asap. I think only parents have the right to stop a child moving away. Also if you are further away it will be less practical for the grandparents to have regular contact which will be taken into account.

  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by Serenity Love View Post
    Oh my goodness OP - when you describe their behavior its like I have written this myself regarding my inlaws. Except my inlaws haven't yet threatened to take us to court...

    I feel for you. Damn i wish you didn't go to theirs for Christmas, especially if there were going to be people there you don't want to give the time of day to (rightfully so) Your narcissistic MIL would have had a field day making you as uncomfortable as possible. They absolutely thrive on such situations. I am so sorry you're going through this, i know EXACTLY how it feels - been suffering my psycho inlaws for the past decade.

    Sadly you guys reacting to their games and firing up is exactly what they wanted. It's so tough dealing with a narcissist.... you're damned if you do and damned if you don't. But i have learned finally that shutting off all emotion is the best way. Don't get angry, don't feel anything for them. But yeah i think in this case now things have really escalated...

    You guys need to this time make this a permanent cutting off of contact now. After making such threats they have proven exactly the lengths they will go to in order to mess with you. Just shocking, with everything else you have dealt with and then this to top it all off it's enough to make you go crazy! Stay strong though, don't budge on the no contact. They sound pure evil.
    Thanks for the response @Serenity Love. Ive actually been thinking of you as I commented on quite a few of your posts so knew you would understand. Im pretty sure you gave birth just before me, and at dandenong also?
    Were u blessed with another ds or a dd?
    Are you still in contact with your inlaws? Hope life is on the improve for you and dh too x

  3. #33
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    Ok so ive got an update..
    Fil sent my dh a txt yesterday asking to meet up which we both thought wasnt a good idea.
    Every time mil does something to us he always has to fix her **** and they never apologize. He uses guilt to make dh feel bad. And also they are purposely trying to keep me out of it and tear our marriage apart. So we agreed no catching up. Dh put his dad on the spot by calling him last night.
    He asked what he wanted and fil can talk on the phone as he doesnt have time to meet up after work, he has a family to come home to (im so proud of him for sticking up for himself by saying that as they always undermine us a family and think they should come first)
    Fil said they will drop the court action... Thank god!!!!!!
    The conversation pretty much ended there. No sorry for anything!
    We were both so emotional after that phonecall. Poor dh was balling his eyes out, ive never seen him like that before and it really broke my heart :-(
    He's saddened that his own family would do this to him without even trying to resolve any issues. They have done this all his life and subsequently my dh now sees a psychologist to deal with this as even when his older (middle)brother died when he was 14 due to mental illness they swept it under the rug and never speak about him.
    Im glad this may be the end of it as we wont be contacting them again but so sad for my dh. We literally have no family now. None.
    But im thankful to have our beautiful family intact and some very close friends

  4. #34
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    Want to give your DH a great big hug xxx

  5. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to lilypily For This Useful Post:

    Cicho  (21-01-2015),olismumma  (21-01-2015)

  6. #35
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    As others have said, cut off all contact and keep copies of everything sent to you. If you were thinking about moving anyway, do it and don't tell them or any other family members where you've moved to. Make sure things like Facebook don't have location services turned on so no one can snitch to them about your location because they saw it there.

  7. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by olismumma View Post
    Thanks for the response @Serenity Love. Ive actually been thinking of you as I commented on quite a few of your posts so knew you would understand. Im pretty sure you gave birth just before me, and at dandenong also?
    Were u blessed with another ds or a dd?
    Are you still in contact with your inlaws? Hope life is on the improve for you and dh too x
    Oh I sure do understand hun. I have narcs on both sides, my own parents and also DH's parents. So i toooootally understand the pure HELL you guys are going through. If you ever need to talk, don't hesitate to PM me! I have been doing a LOT of research on narcs and the best way to handle them as I have to for the sake of my sanity. DH is seeing a psychologist. They can destroy your soul and totally ruin your spirit. But they can be dealt with if you know how. Funnily enough the best way, is to not give a crap about them. Just to be cold and rather ruthless. That can be a challenge though if that's hard for you to pull off, as it is for me as i am not generally that way inclined. But i am realising now after years of torture... that i need to be with them and any other narc i come across. And practice makes perfect.

    Oh my god I am so relieved with your update too. I had a feeling hey were full of it. ya know what I have realised with my narc mum and Inlaws? They don't care about my kids. They care more about controlling me and causing me stress. I knew with your inlaws being narcs that they already got their kicks out of stressing you poor buggers out by threatening. Its just terrible because the games they play are so so sooooo low. I don't even know where to begin with the **** my mother has put me through lately...

    Your poor DH. And YOU! I can only imagine the HELL they have put you both through. Thank god you're cutting them off, they have sincerely proven they are complete and utter lost causes.

    Did you have your bub in Dandy as well???? My god its been ages since I have been on! yes I had DD! DS is a big bro now and he loves her so much and she already adores him its very sweet! I can't believe 2 months has already passed now, when did you have your bub??

    I hope things look up for you guys now and you're able to recover and find peace asap. You both deserve it. Very sorry you both had to go through that. Fricken mongrels!!

    Oh and a update on my Inlaws from Hell - I stupidly agreed to visiting them on NYD so they could meet DD, and MIL had other relatives here as well so she used that as a opportunity to just steam roll DH and I and she even unleashed her manipulative crap onto DS and had him feeling very anxious and lost. I saw red. I had some stern words to her and then we left. And then about an hour ago she sent me a friends request on facebook LMAO. Yeah right! Request denied!
    Last edited by Serenity Love; 21-01-2015 at 22:54.


 

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