+ Reply to Thread
Page 4 of 6 FirstFirst ... 23456 LastLast
Results 31 to 40 of 53
  1. #31
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    Sydney
    Posts
    2,845
    Thanks
    1,822
    Thanked
    1,423
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Thanks, I hope so too.

    Regardless, it means a great deal to me, and I made sure he knew that. He was so happy that I was thrilled.
    Hard to put into words, but it really is the small things.

  2. The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to DT75 For This Useful Post:

    Apple iPhart6  (22-01-2015),CakeyMumma  (16-01-2015),New Hope  (16-01-2015),Sookie Stackedhouse  (16-01-2015),SuperGranny  (19-01-2015)

  3. #32
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    1,648
    Thanks
    558
    Thanked
    428
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Any updates hun?
    I hope your talk went well for you.

  4. #33
    Gothel's Avatar
    Gothel is offline Skip the drama, stay with Mama!
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Stressame Street
    Posts
    6,515
    Thanks
    2,368
    Thanked
    2,113
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I've been thinking about you and this thread @DT75 and hoping your chat went well on Saturday.

  5. #34
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Posts
    1,883
    Thanks
    76
    Thanked
    634
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Hope your talk went well and you both could open up

  6. #35
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    Sydney
    Posts
    2,845
    Thanks
    1,822
    Thanked
    1,423
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Hi everyone,

    Our chat went really well. We spoke for 3 hours Sat morning, and had questions for each other throughout the day.

    It turns out, DH still has a high sex drive, but instead of utilising that with his willing wife, he was chatting to women online about it. It stayed online, except for once, when he met up with a woman. I have spoken to her and am confident that is didn't go passed talking.

    DH has an appointment with a psychologist to work through the problem. He fully admitted that this is something he has done through all his relationships, and he never really believed it counted as cheating- as there was nothing physical. However, when I asked how he would feel if I was the one doing it, he panicked.

    I have assured him that provided he stays honest, and sees someone to work through this need he has to be wanted, that I will stay with him. I have told him that I do consider what he did cheating, and i will also see someone to address this.

    Oddly, I still trust him. I had some idea that he was flirting online, but not to this extent. While I am hurt, I am confident that we can work through it, and come out the other side intact.

    We talked about postponing TTC, but neither of us want to do that. For now, we won't actively try to get pregnant, until we decide either way.

  7. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to DT75 For This Useful Post:

    Apple iPhart6  (22-01-2015),GrabbyCrabby  (20-01-2015),misskittyfantastico  (20-01-2015)

  8. #36
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    12,708
    Thanks
    9,558
    Thanked
    12,691
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 9/1/15Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 7/11/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 3/10/14100 Posts in a week

    Default Today I told my husband...

    Awesome to hear you and hubby are communicating better now. And I admire your strength and compassion for not just giving your hubby the flick. At there same ... Eeek... Guys don't meet strange chicks just for coffee. Please use contraception until your hubby has proven beyond a doubt he has a handle on his mental health issues and is over his urge to cheat. He is facing some real tough issues and a screaming baby will only make a barely tolerable situation totally crazy.
    Last edited by VicPark; 20-01-2015 at 16:41.

  9. The Following User Says Thank You to VicPark For This Useful Post:

    DT75  (20-01-2015)

  10. #37
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    Sydney
    Posts
    2,845
    Thanks
    1,822
    Thanked
    1,423
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    Awesome to hear you and hubby are communicating better now. And I admire your strength and compassion for not just giving your hubby the flick. At there same ... Eeek... Guys don't meet strange chicks just for coffee. Please use contraception until your hubby has proven beyond a doubt he has a handle on his mental health issues and is over his urge to cheat. He is facing some real tough issues and a screaming baby will only make a barely tolerable situation totally crazy.
    He was honest, he was considering having sex with her. But he couldn't quite convince himself of a reason that was ok. It's reasonable to assume flirting may be ok. It is not reasonable to assume sex is.

    I am not going back on contraception. We have discussed it. He doesn't have an urge to cheat, just an urge to be wanted. It's never going to go away, but a psych can help him find ways to deal with it.

  11. #38
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    1,648
    Thanks
    558
    Thanked
    428
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I agree with vp.
    Until you are both very sure you have dealt with the cheating, on both your side (being hurt) and his need to and lack of thought about you, then a baby does not help. We had a baby and that triggered him to do it again.
    Please be careful.
    Hugs.

  12. The Following User Says Thank You to Sookie Stackedhouse For This Useful Post:

    Albert01  (20-01-2015)

  13. #39
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    6,694
    Thanks
    1,185
    Thanked
    3,209
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Good luck OP. Having kids is the most stressful thing ever and if your relationship isn't rock solid it will tear it apart. I hope ttc takes a while so you can work through the issues.

  14. #40
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    6,694
    Thanks
    1,185
    Thanked
    3,209
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I work with majority blokes and have learned 1 thing. Where there is smoke there is fire. Always. They never ever stop at flirting. I would say 60% probably even higher cheat on their partners who have no idea.


 

Similar Threads

  1. Nobody told me it would be like this....
    By TTC1morepink in forum Anxiety & Panic Disorders
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 21-12-2014, 18:44
  2. If your husband told you..
    By Patience Belmont in forum General Chat
    Replies: 60
    Last Post: 16-05-2014, 17:32
  3. Sooo... My 2yr old just told me
    By 2Bboys in forum General Chat
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 04-05-2014, 17:15

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Einsteinz Music
Make music at Einsteinz Music in age-appropriate class in Sydney's Inner West, Eastern Suburbs or North Shore. For ages 6 mths - 4 yrs. All music is live! Christmas Gift certificates available for full term or casual classes. Call 0431 338 143
sales & new stuffsee all
CarmelsBeautySecrets
Growing your own natural nails is easy. Years ago, I devised a simple and very effective technique which really helps boosts the nails' growth in as little as three days! And most importantly keeps them that way.
featured supporter
Impressionable Kids
Impressionable Kids are Australia's leader in framed children's memorabilia and specialise in framed baby hand and feet sculptures. With franchise locations throughout Australia you can be assured you will receive a quality handmade product with a lifetime warranty on all frames.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!