I am currently reading "Kids, Parents and Power Struggles" by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka she is the author of "Raising your spirited child". My 3 yr old is giving me the worst time lately. Anyway the book says to identify the child's emotion, like "I can see you are angry/frustrated/sad etc but we don't hit etc etc etc" . My problem is that there doesn't seem to be any emotion behind him doing things. Like today we had just come home from the park and we had been in the door about 5 minutes when he threw a toy at my mother, no reason for it at all, I do the whole "you may not throw your toys" spiel and a couple of minutes later he throws his shoe at me. So that's a 3 (1 2 3 magic) and into time out, when he has calmed down I do the "spiel" again adding that if he can't stop his behavior himself then I will stop him with a time out. So how do you identify an emotion when there doesn't seem to be one and he is just doing it because he feels like it. Help please.