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  1. #51
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    Please put me down for the 1st of Feb. Cycle 1 for us trying for our second.

  2. #52
    AdornedWithCats's Avatar
    AdornedWithCats is offline Winner 2013 - Spirit of BubHub Award
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    When do you get the results of your bt @unicornsandrainbows? Its great your dh's test was good, please dont blame yourself though!

    @DT75 sounds like some of the romance had gone astray in your relationship. Its hard to keep that up when ttc and certainly not helped by your dh being too tired. I saw your other thread, fx you can sort it out.

    @gamermummy second cycle here ttc #2. How old is your 1st?

    Sent from my GT-I9305 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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  4. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by AdornedWithCats View Post
    When do you get the results of your bt @unicornsandrainbows? Its great your dh's test was good, please dont blame yourself though!

    @DT75 sounds like some of the romance had gone astray in your relationship. Its hard to keep that up when ttc and certainly not helped by your dh being too tired. I saw your other thread, fx you can sort it out.

    @gamermummy second cycle here ttc #2. How old is your 1st?

    Sent from my GT-I9305 using The Bub Hub mobile app
    It's been gone for a while... I was hoping that TTC would give it a boost (not that I mean that in a bandaid baby way, but that having regular sex would promote more intimacy), but nope. It's the same. If it continues, it will be pure luck if we get pregnant, because we only BD 1-3 times a month.

  5. #54
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    Quote Originally Posted by AdornedWithCats View Post
    When do you get the results of your bt @unicornsandrainbows? Its great your dh's test was good, please dont blame yourself though!

    @DT75 sounds like some of the romance had gone astray in your relationship. Its hard to keep that up when ttc and certainly not helped by your dh being too tired. I saw your other thread, fx you can sort it out.

    @gamermummy second cycle here ttc #2. How old is your 1st?

    Sent from my GT-I9305 using The Bub Hub mobile app
    My first is 17 months old we want a small age gap.

  6. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by grace View Post
    Hi guys.. Sad to be back here but this TTC journey must go on. I have absolutely no idea when I'll be testing. Still waiting for my hcg to return to zero but in the mean time I hope ya'll don't mind me hanging around. For some reason trying again feels like the only thing that will make this all better. I understand that in no way does that sound normal. I'm just a weirdo.

    Great to see some more bfp's coming from the Jan thread
    not a weirdo at all. I did the same thing after my miscarriage back in July. Hoping it won't be much longer...

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  8. #56
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    Quote Originally Posted by DT75 View Post
    It doesn't work, he's just not interested. He claims he's tired all the time but there's more to it. I snapped today and told him I feel like his roommate rather than his wife, and it's been that was since March last year (or thereabouts). He freaked out, and has claimed he has had a wake-up call.He's due home from work any minute so we'll see...Bend & snap though.. haha, i remember that.
    we've been through patches like this, but it's usually been me who's not been interested. What have you tried? from personal experience, sparks fly when both parties feel appreciated and are made to feel like the king/queen of the castle iykwim. Spoil him. Make his favourite dinner, wear lingerie you know he likes, let him have down time if he needs it, allow him to hang with the boys now and then. Make sure he's the first thing you notice when he comes home (or when you do, whoever gets in last), ask him how his day was, and actually be interested enough to enquire past the first answer. Ask the how and why questions of his day. When our marriage was at its worst, these things weren't happening, and we became 'roommates' for a while, sometimes only bding once in a month, which was a huge difference to the 5-6 times a week we were doing before it dwindled. Although they don't admit it, men love it when their women are proud of what they do. Tell him so, and tell him when he looks good. You never know, all the boost he receives to his ego may get him in the mood, and rekindle your romance

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  10. #57
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    Please put me down for Feb 18th

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  12. #58
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    Quote Originally Posted by jussi View Post
    we've been through patches like this, but it's usually been me who's not been interested. What have you tried? from personal experience, sparks fly when both parties feel appreciated and are made to feel like the king/queen of the castle iykwim. Spoil him. Make his favourite dinner, wear lingerie you know he likes, let him have down time if he needs it, allow him to hang with the boys now and then. Make sure he's the first thing you notice when he comes home (or when you do, whoever gets in last), ask him how his day was, and actually be interested enough to enquire past the first answer. Ask the how and why questions of his day. When our marriage was at its worst, these things weren't happening, and we became 'roommates' for a while, sometimes only bding once in a month, which was a huge difference to the 5-6 times a week we were doing before it dwindled. Although they don't admit it, men love it when their women are proud of what they do. Tell him so, and tell him when he looks good. You never know, all the boost he receives to his ego may get him in the mood, and rekindle your romance
    Haha, you just described our typical day. Seriously, I have done everything. Recently, I tried ignoring him, and that seemed to work for a bit.
    He really is just not interested, and until he decides to be interested, it doesn't matter what I do (bipolar and this is an ongoing thing- if he doesn't make the decision himself to do something, anything, it doesn't happen).

    ETA:
    Typical day- he gets up at 6am, I wake at 6.30 he's in the shower so I make him a coffee. He leaves at 7am. I spend the morning cleaning the house and doing dinner prep, shower, dress, go to work. I text him throughout the day, asking how he is, chatting, joking, etc. I get home at 5pm and put dinner on. I have a quick shower and change into "his fave" nighty (i have 3 of them lol). Greet him with a coffee and a kiss. We chat about his work day, he asks about mine. I get his clothes ready for the next day, and serve dinner. He picks a movie and we eat and watch. I put dishes in kitchen to be washed later, and we sit on couch and watch movie. I try to snuggle, he moves away. He lies in my lap and I rub his head (he loves this). He gets ready for bed, I do the dishes and get ready too. In bed, I turn to kiss him and I know by the kiss if it's going to be a goodnight kiss (followed by him turning over and going to sleep), or a "good night" kiss (followed by him turning over and going to sleep). Eventually I drift off too.
    And repeat...
    Generally, if he allows the snuggle after dinner, it means BD time.

    He said for the first 2 years of our relationship that I need to take initiative more with sex. As soon as I started too (at times we would usually BD), he started to lose interest. I halved my initiating and it didnt get better. I asked if he wanted me to stop initiating, he said no. I stopped initiating...it still didn't get better. We went from 3 times a day, to 3 times a month, within about 2 weeks.

    *shrug* If I give him advance notice, we usually BD... but it's difficult to know when you're going to be in the mood most of the time.

    My bold- this is the problem. I don't feel this. He doesn't do much for me. He makes me a coffee in the morning on the weekends IF he is up before me, and he makes dinner on a Sat night (well, he orders pizza). I don't feel wanted. So he is distant, and I get distant because of it, which makes him more distant. We discussed it about 2 years ago, but it was never this bad.
    Last edited by DT75; 15-01-2015 at 16:12.

  13. #59
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    Quote Originally Posted by jussi View Post
    not a weirdo at all. I did the same thing after my miscarriage back in July. Hoping it won't be much longer...
    Thanks jussi I'm also hoping you get your bfp soon!

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  15. #60
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    unicornsandrainbows is offline Somewhere over the rainbow skies are blue
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    I was given the results of yesterday's tests today. I'm still trying to sort through them and i have to go back in for more tests. When i collect my thoughts i'll give a proper update. For anyone who's interested

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