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  1. #1
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    Default How can I keep my confidence?

    We have had a sleep consultant out to help with the sleep issues so we are currently working through that sleep plan.

    Does anyone have any tips for how I can keep my confidence for settling ds? So many times ill be trying & ds will start screaming & wont stop, regardless of what I try. So then if dh is here he will come & take over & ds immediately stops screaming & 5-10 minutes he's asleep, with no or only minimal protesting.

    It makes me want to cry, I dont know what im doing wrong. Dh & I are doing the exact same thing & it works for him & not me.

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    The only thing that I can think of is that your DS senses that you aren't confident, whereas your DH has settled him before so he picks up on that and is more relaxed.
    I think it is something inate in mothers, we are wired to react to our babies cries.
    Some things that I do when my babies have been difficult to settle is hold them against my chest and take long slow breaths, rhythmic patting and shushing. Think happy thoughts and try to relax and ignore the screaming! But I'm sure you've tried most of those.
    Has the sleep consultant suggested teaching him to self settle? Not sure if that would be something you would consider, but as it sounds like there is already a lot of crying, a few days of crying to result in a baby that doesn't need a lot of intervention to settle might be a good thing?
    ETA- Just realised I didn't answer your question at all - I don't really know the answer, are you feeling more or less confident that you were when he was a little baby?
    Last edited by LittleBug'sMum; 01-01-2015 at 08:45.

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  4. #3
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    Are you breastfeeding OP? I've heard of babies being harder to settle for mums as they smell breast milk and want a feed.
    Other than that try as pp suggested and take long deep breaths and tell yourself you are doing what is best for your baby - helping them get to sleep

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    Yes im breastfeeding.

    Littlebugsmum we will be teaching him to self settle but we are doing it slowly & gently cause he's very ingrained in the habit of being rocked to sleep

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    LittleBug'sMum  (01-01-2015)

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    I tried for some time to teach DS 5 months to sleep. I managed to get him to self settle during the day but I couldn't settle him at night. He was waking all through the night. The only person that can settle him is my DH. I think DS wants my milk and me! That's ok but not all night!
    So just saying don't take it too much to heart. Get your DH to do the majority of training until your baby gets it on his own. DS realised I wasn't around and now sleeps all night. This may happen for you too whether during day or night

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    Also keep being consistent with the method chosen.

  9. #7
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    What were the tips they gave you? Are there wholesale changes to what you were doing or just tweaks.

  10. #8
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    We are now settling at 1hr 15 awake with the aim of him being asleep by 1hr & 30mins.

    We are gradually transitioning step by step from rocking to sleep in our arms to eventually placing him in his cot & leaving the room.

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  12. #9
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    You need to relax as bub can sense your stress. As mentioned previously getting professional help for your anxiety is THE key. Good luck xx

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    Im seeing someone next week for my anxiety. Not sure how good they will be given its a free service, but ill give it a go

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