My bil is driving me nuts! Its petty but so frustrating & im not sure what to do about it.
All family members, including bil, love ds & im so grateful for that. Bil knows nothing about babies, ds is the first baby he has ever been around.
Literally every time we see him, when either dh or I are trying to settle ds he always has to come in half way through, not sure if he thinks he can help, or just wants to keep interacting with ds, no idea why but its literally every time. Im getting seriously frustrated by it, like today - ds had done really well opening presents etc so he would have been very overstimulated. I took him into a quiet dark room & gave him a good feed & then spent some time sitting & cuddling him, shhing quietly etc. Ds didnt cry & was really starting to settle. This was a huge thing for me as I can rarely get him to settle on a regular day (when hes not overstimulated etc). I then put him down in the portacot awake & sat there stroking his forehead. No crying, no winging & he was falling asleep. Next thing I know he's wide awake being silly etc & I look up to see bil in the doorway doing big exaggerated smiley faces at him. I was so close to getting him down in a portacot by myself . I just glared at bil, picked ds up (as he was wide awake then) & sat down on the bed with him - bil then walked into the room, sat down next to me & started interracting with ds. I said 'well he's wide awake now so do you want to settle him?' Bil said 'do I want to settle him? (as in 'why would I want to do that?' tone of voice). Neither dh or I could get ds down after that so we gave up & ended up leaving a short time later. Now hes really overtired & overstimulated so this evening wont be fun.
Thats just today's example. Last night we were out & dh & i took ds into another room to feed & settle (dh came too to help me set up a feeding space etc as it was someone elses house). I was just getting ready to feed & dh was holding ds (luckily id unclipped my bra but hadnt pulked my top up yet & bil just walked in. I said 'umm im about to feed him' & he still didnt leave for ages, started playing with ds etc. Dh had to tell him to leave.
Its not just me, he does it to dh too. Sometimes dh goes to settle ds & I dont even need to go, & then a few minutes later bil gets up & goes. Dh has tried to talk to him but he just doesnt get it. I get that he wants to play with ds but ds cant just stay awake & play all day, he needs to sleep. We have enough dramas with sleep & getting ds to settle anyway, he is never going to go to sleep if someone is interracting with him.
Bil knows nothing about babies at all so id rather not just leave him by himself to settle ds cause ds will probably just become hysterical. But no idea what else to do.