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  1. #1
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    Default So sick of limbo! This time of year sucks.

    I'll try to cut a long story short. I'm in limbo-land with this pregnancy, and if it was any other time of year, I'd probably be slightly less impatient, what will be will be, etc. However, with Xmas looming, I'd really like to be out of limbo before my 15+ relatives arrive at our house next week.

    I got my first very feint, early BFP on the 10 November. Since then I've had 3 scans (each a week apart), 3 bHCG blood tests, countless doc appointments and 3 weeks of continuous spotting, which so far hasn't really got worse, but not better, and no explanation as yet. Freaking out much.

    First 2 scans showed nothing (suggested I was much earlier than I thought), but HCG was rising normally so hence the subsequent scan to rule out extopic - which they have done, as they saw an interuterine gestational sac (but no visible yolk etc) last week. 4 weeks after my BFP... (HCG day before was 8000).

    I'm no medical professional but everything I've read suggests that they should be able to see more than just a sac at over 4 weeks after a positive preg test (would be over 5 weeks since conception?).
    However the specialist (OBGYN women's imaging specialist) did not suggest it was a failed pregnancy, saying it could still be fine, sac was measuring 5-6 weeks, and come back in 2 weeks when they'd have to see a HB etc.

    Problem is, 2 weeks is Xmas day, and they close this Friday not to open again until 5th Jan. So I'm booked in Jan, however that's 3.5 weeks after my last scan, a long f*&^king time to wait, especially if this is a failed pregnancy.
    My first reaction was oh well, I'll have to wait, not much they can do anyway.

    However with each day of spotting I can't help feel things aren't quite right, and if this IS a failed pregnancy can someone please confirm this asap and do what needs to be done so I can move on? I am so worried I'll be sitting on the bathroom floor in a pool of blood on xmas day with all my relatives here. I feel like this is just one long, slow miscarriage, teasing me with every passing day as its not definite.

    Sorry for the negativity, I've all but lost hope. I feel like no one is listening to me when I question the viability given the dates, its like my first BFP doesn't mean anything (probably because it was a home test, each practitioner just goes off their own notes... suggesting its too early to see, blaming everything from my apparently backward, mis-shapen uterus to possible incorrect dates).

    Of course, if there is even the slightest chance things are ok I'd want to give it that chance. But its not my fault the imaging specialist is closing for 2 weeks right when I need them most....

    Should I try and get another test before xmas elsewhere? Or is that adding to the stress/confusion (ie could be a totally different person, and from what I've experienced, they'd want to check up on me in a week or so anyway before ruling it failed?)?

    Or should I just be patient and let things be, do lots of praying, yoga, meditation and hope for the best?

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    A-Squared  (18-12-2014)

  3. #2
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    Oh hun, big hugs! What a stressful time!

    After I had a missed miscarriage and was pregnant again, I was constantly worried during the first 12 weeks that it would happen again. So I ended up going to a different GP and saying that I had a BFP from a HPT and wasn't sure of my dates as my cycles were inconsistent, so could I please have a dating scan? The GP wrote me a referral and I was able to go in to the local scanning place that afternoon. Everything showed up fine and it put my mind at rest.

    If I was in your position I would probably try to get in for another scan before xmas, just so you could know either way. Even a week should show a difference in size and development.

    Sending you positive sticky baby vibes xx

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    sunnygirl79  (16-12-2014)

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    To give you an idea hun, I got a super, super barely even there BFP on the 5th of November.. I'm 9 weeks now, I'd take a guess that you're not too far behind me..
    If you've known for 4 weeks that you're pregnant I'd add another 3-4 weeks on top of that to allow for conception/implantation and such.

    I'd be kicking and screaming to get another scan in this week before Christmas to confirm a loss or viability. When was your last scan? You could try a different ultrasound clinic?

    So sorry that you're going through this

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    sunnygirl79  (16-12-2014)

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    Thanks @littlelove and @tazz475. Lucky I'm quiet at work so I've managed to get in to see my GP today. Even though he's no specialist, I'm hoping he might be able to offer me advice on what to do. The anxiety is killing, me, I've been an emotional wreck for weeks and not being a very good wife/mother at a time when my family should be celebrating our rare time off together.
    I'm so scared of having a MC, but have not connected to this pregnancy at all with everything going on. There's just too many things going wrong for me to be at any kind of peace. My hubby just keeps telling me it will be ok (bless him), he's been to all my appointments with me.
    Its all well and good for health professionals to say just wait another 2 or 3 weeks. They don't have to live with the anxiety every single day. I really wish I could have a vino right about now!

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    Is there another U/S place that will be open? You can take your referral to any clinic that offers the required service - it doesn't matter which clinic's name is on it.

    I was spotting when I was pregnant with my DS and my clinic wasn't open (early Jan). I was about to head overseas for work and was terrified of miscarrying on a plane or alone in another country, so I phoned around and eventually found a place that was open and begged them for an appointment.

    I hope you're able to get answers soon. The waiting and wondering is terrible.

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    If it were me I'd be trying to find another u/s place, I couldnt wait til Jan either. sorry you're in this situation, I hope you have some answers soon

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    sunnygirl79  (16-12-2014)

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    See if you can find a bulk billing centre that does u/s. They often have last minute cancellations (in my experience) and you can ask to be put on a list to be called if something opens up.
    I'm so sorry you are going through all this xxxx

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    sunnygirl79  (16-12-2014)

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    I'm glad you've got your DH as support. Hope you can get in somewhere for a scan, just don't take no for an answer x

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    Thanks guys. I saw my GP and explained the situation (he has all the reports anyway) and my predicament. He's suggested waiting until Monday for another scan, and getting yet another blood test later this week. He's also admitted (after much probing from me) that it isn't looking great, but that no one was about to order a termination of pregnancy based on the current data.
    So pretty much as I thought, more than likely a failed pregnancy, but no one's willing to confirm that diagnosis yet.
    It sounds horrible but I had hoped if it was failed I could have a D&C so we could move on and start trying again asap (we'd been trying almost a year, I know that's nothing compared to some, but I am not getting any younger, wish we'd started trying a year earlier!). And if I go into priv hospital this year, it won't cost me anything as hubby has already been twice this year (its been a sh*tty year for us) so reached our excess maximum. If I go in January, it will cost $500.
    Stupid stuff to be thinking about I know.

    So do I listen to doc and wait until Monday or just go in Thursday or Friday (a week since last scan)? (Its a different ultrasound centre from last one, but they did my previous 2 scans.)

    I don't know why he wants to wait until Monday. I guess its so they can make a decision beyond reasonable doubt?

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    Hi if you go Thursday who will review you scan and order the D&C? If you go Monday then am I right in assuming your GP will?

    It's such a rubbish situation to be in so close to Christmas. You should have an answer though for that week in between Christmas and new year to get in for the D&C.

    I guess I was lucky in a way that mine was Ivf and we knew the exact dates.

    Best of luck


 

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