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  1. #1
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    Default Going from 3 to 4 children, what can you tell me please?

    Hi all,

    I have 3 children (4, 2, and 4 months ) and would love any information / tips / advice for going from 3 to 4 kids.

    I'm looking for how it went for you, unexpected issues, costs to consider, and what was great. Any info on close age gaps would be great also.

    Oh course, anything else you might think would be applicable is welcome too.

    Thanks in advance.

  2. #2
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    Three to four was easy as. One to two was hardest. By the time you get to number four you're pretty confident in your parenting, have a pretty good idea what to expect and know how to juggle things.
    The hard part is needing a car to fit the family in, no family passes for four child families exist, and finding babysitters for all is hard as nobody wants to care for that many extra kids.

    Sent from my C6603 using The Bub Hub mobile app

  3. #3
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    I had an unplanned pregnancy when my twins were a year old, I was not happy. I did a lot of soul searching and cried for weeks and decided to go ahead with the pregnancy. When my 4th was born my eldest was 4 years old, and the twins were 21 months old, so none of them were at school at that point, and we knew straight away that there was no way we could afford to put them all into day-care as my wage didn't cover a days cost for 4 in daycare.

    We decided to move to a regional town from inner Sydney - so that we could afford for me not to work. We had bought a commodore wagon a few months before, so instead of getting a new car, we got a dickie seat installed in the back - it was about $1400. But it is a great way to add more space without having to get a new car - if you can.

    I'm not going to lie, those first couple of years were pretty rough. I realise some people don't feel like that, but truth be told we aren't all made to have big families I don't think - so I found it difficult (Although I do have and ASD child which made things difficult as well) And our finances have taken a huge beating because I've been off work for a long time.

    When the twins were little, it was impossible for us to go out without both parents, the twins would just take off in different directions. It was all a bit of a shamoz.

    Having said all that - we have turned a corner in the last 6 months and things are so much better, everything seems to be getting easier as the kids get older. And moving out of Sydney was one of the best things we ever did. I really love living regional. So that was a bonus.

    Oh - and it is really expensive, especially if any of the kids have medical issues. We went to the movies the other day and it was 80 for the 6 of us without the popcorn! Just things like that, holidays are really expensive and a lot of places don't cater for more than 2 kids, in terms of rooms.

    I wouldn't change it though - DS 4 is a great kid, and he is my baby - even now he is 3.5

  4. #4
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    I've got 4 kids (11, 8, 21 months & 7 months)

    Because we have such a small gap between 3 & 4 I found it really really hard. 2 pregnancies and 2 c sections in 2 years has really taken its toll on my body, I've just been diagnosed with pnd.

    When we found out we were expecting #4 I was so upset, I really didn't accept my pregnancy or bond with the baby until I was around 30 weeks along.

    Having said that I wouldn't change anything. Amelia is the light of my life, I can't imagine life without her.

    Feel free to pm me if you've got any more questions.

  5. #5
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    When #4 was born I had a 3.5yr old and 20 month old twins. It was easy for me because of Babywearing! If the older boys wanted lunch but bub wanted a seep I would just pop him on my back in a woven wrap. He would go to sleep, I could get the other boys lunch done and after lunch I could transfer him to a bed for the rest of his sleep! Easy!
    I realise Babywearing is not for everyone but it seriously saved my sanity with 4 kids 3.5 and under!!!
    Even now that's "bub" is 17 months Babywearing still makes my life soo much easier!

  6. #6
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    I used a wrap with DD3 (my fourth) sometimes too and it was a life saving for getting dinner and some house work done and getting out of the house easier. Obviously your car would be a consideration, we already had a 7 seater thankfully but there would be short term ways around an upgrade if you needed more time. House wise we only have three bedrooms at the moment and can make do while the kids are young, our eldest girl and youngest share whilst our middle two share, none of them will sleep alone anyway so this works for now though I recognise that it won't forever. Cost hasn't been a huge increase for us yet as DD3 is 18 months and only just self weaned so no formula costs and she eats what we eat so just a little bit more money spent on food, obviously nappies are a cost but I was very lucky that a friend gave me a stack of modern cloths so I don't even have to buy sposies if I don't want too. I also was given a ton of hand me downs as well as the hand me downs from DD2 so I have never really had to buy DD3 clothes. We won't have much extra primary school costs when the time comes as we use the local public school, we are undecided on high school options but there is plenty of time for that right now.

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    Bump!

  8. #8
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    I have just gone from 3 to 4 five weeks ago. I have four boys aged 7,5,3 and five weeks. I have found planning ahead helps particularly with meals. I try to get easy leave in the oven to cook meals atm. It hasn't been too bad so far, my oldest likes to help out a lot which helps. We live in a rural area and got a new Prado with the extra seats included, we are thinking we will need a trailer for holidays and trips.

  9. #9
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    We are getting an extension on our house next year and in need of a bigger car, but apart from that nothing really any different..

  10. #10
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    Thank you for the responses so far (sorry for the delay in my reply, I've been away). Can I ask any of you to give me your stories on how you've managed sharing your time etc? I am a little concerned about having enough one-on-one time with each of my 3 children, making sure I can nurture them all, make them not feel like one in a large crowd etc, let alone if there was a 4th.

    Would anyone like to comment on this?

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