Just called my sister to tell her, for the first time, that I've come to terms with the fact that my husband is abusive.. Her attitude was 'oh, I wouldn't think too much of it, most husbands are like that'
Can you tell me, does your husband;
*yell at you
*blame you for everything
*control your finances & tell you what you can /can't buy
*insult your intelligence
*show little respect for you
*treat you like a burden
He also comments on my behaviour all the time & how I act/speak to his friends & family
"don't say that again. You sounded up yourself saying that, that was rude don't talk/act like that"
He has to give me his two cents on everything I do from wiping the bench tops to business decisions.. And it's always negative criticism. Never positive.
I'm just tired. Tired of defending myself to a man that doesn't really deserve any explanations.
I've been reading a lot about abusive partnerships & one thing that really struck out was how well he can compose himself when he's talking to EVERYONE else. He has a great job, friends & family & they would think he is the nicest quietest most polite man.. But he's anything but towards me. He clearly has the ability to control himself he just chooses to let loose with me.
He's not 'intentionally physically violent' although he has conveniently accidentally hurt me when she's had the sh1ts before (hit me in the face with a coat hanger most recently)
He's a great dad & treats his daughter like a princess he just has zero respect for her mother. Yesterday I told him he either pulls his socks up & makes an effort or we are out of here (again)
Now that dd is getting older I don't want her thinking it's acceptable for her husband to speak to her/treat her like her father treats me.
I'm interested in hearing bother ends of the spectrum of opinions & advice.
We've been together for 7 years & I feel like I can't do anything right (I don't even bother to try any more I just try my best to avoid & ignore him)