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  1. #351
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    When we found out that ds2 is a boy, my mother said "Oh, beggars can't be choosers." And telling me how much she hoped he was a girl and asking if I was disappointed etc.
    When she was having kids she wanted all girls and openly tells my brother she wishes he was a girl.
    My sister gave her 2 grand daughters and I gave her 2 grandsons and a granddaughter.

  2. #352
    Rutabaga's Avatar
    Rutabaga is offline Getting it together, one day at a time.
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    Just a few of the comments from my MIL.

    DS only wanted to be held facing outwards while being bounced and walking around when he was younger, and hated being held by anyone except me and, occasionally, DP. When he was 3 months he was screaming while MIL was visiting, and she insisted on holding him. DP handed him over and reminded her how he liked to be held, but she ignored him and snuggled DS against her shoulder. When he was still crying 3 minutes later she thrust him away from her and glared at him before saying "so you're going to hate me like your sisters do". She ignored him for the rest of the night, and spent a good half hour telling my dad and step mum (who she had just met) that DP's ex had taught the girls to hate her.

    On the same night she told everyone I had stolen a shawl from her. When I said I had thought she wanted me to have it because, you know, she'd given it to me, she replied that if saying that made me feel better... I got the ugly **** thing from the cupboard it had been in since I got it and gave it back to her. She refused it and wanted to know why I was being like that!

    DSD2 and I went in to see her less than a week after DSD2 had overdosed on panadol, because MIL was sooo concerned about her. She didn't once ask DSD2 how she was, just *****ed about how hard her life is and how nobody looks after her or comes to visit. When we were leaving, she grabbed DSD2 and asked when she was going to be a good granddaughter and come to work in her yard! Then she got upset with me for telling her dsd2 was doing year 10, working and had a lot on her plate, but I'd come in if she needed help.

    The day after DP passed away she, DSDs 1 and 2, and dp's ex were having dinner at the hotel restaurant. She told them she didn't understand why I was the person people (hospital, DP's work, funeral homes etc) were asking what to do. "DP and rutabaga aren't married, so they should be asking me, I'm his next of kin". Apparently 9.5 years together, a mortgage, child and plans for the rest of our lives doesn't count for much.

    This isn't something she saud, but what she did. MIL and BIL flew from Alice to Darwin the day before the rest of us. Our charter arrived, with dp's coffin, as the Melbourne cup was being run. BIL posted later that day on Facebook, congratulating his mum on winning the best dressed award at their local sportsclub's Melbourne Cup day!

    MIL and BIL put a notice in the paper, saying DP was son of...brother of...uncle and uncle in law to...and great-uncle to... But no mention of myself or his 3 kids. I read that after the funeral, and the same day I saw a screen shot of BIL's Facebook status calling me a ****ing ******* for turning off DP's life support before he could see him. No mention of the fact that DP wouldn't have lasted more than a couple of hours longer, and BIL didn't fly in til after lunch the next day. What burns me is that the girls saw that on his feed and it devastated them, because we all made the decision together. No prizes for telling BIL that story...

    And lastly, before DP's funeral she told me she'd decided not to make a claim against DP's estate! I suppose it's good of her to not make a claim, but I was gobsmacked that a grandparent would even consider it. The estate is all that's standing between me and DS being on the streets, and is the last gift DP can give his children!

    Ugh, sorry it's become a vent. I spent years pushing for DP and my DSDs to have more to do with MIL, because I think family is important. But no matter what I do, it's never enough for her. The best way I can sum it up is this. When dsd1 turned 18 in Decmber one of the first things she said was "now no one can make me see her". Sad, hey?

  3. #353
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rutabaga View Post
    Just a few of the comments from my MIL.

    DS only wanted to be held facing outwards while being bounced and walking around when he was younger, and hated being held by anyone except me and, occasionally, DP. When he was 3 months he was screaming while MIL was visiting, and she insisted on holding him. DP handed him over and reminded her how he liked to be held, but she ignored him and snuggled DS against her shoulder. When he was still crying 3 minutes later she thrust him away from her and glared at him before saying "so you're going to hate me like your sisters do". She ignored him for the rest of the night, and spent a good half hour telling my dad and step mum (who she had just met) that DP's ex had taught the girls to hate her.

    On the same night she told everyone I had stolen a shawl from her. When I said I had thought she wanted me to have it because, you know, she'd given it to me, she replied that if saying that made me feel better... I got the ugly **** thing from the cupboard it had been in since I got it and gave it back to her. She refused it and wanted to know why I was being like that!

    DSD2 and I went in to see her less than a week after DSD2 had overdosed on panadol, because MIL was sooo concerned about her. She didn't once ask DSD2 how she was, just *****ed about how hard her life is and how nobody looks after her or comes to visit. When we were leaving, she grabbed DSD2 and asked when she was going to be a good granddaughter and come to work in her yard! Then she got upset with me for telling her dsd2 was doing year 10, working and had a lot on her plate, but I'd come in if she needed help.

    The day after DP passed away she, DSDs 1 and 2, and dp's ex were having dinner at the hotel restaurant. She told them she didn't understand why I was the person people (hospital, DP's work, funeral homes etc) were asking what to do. "DP and rutabaga aren't married, so they should be asking me, I'm his next of kin". Apparently 9.5 years together, a mortgage, child and plans for the rest of our lives doesn't count for much.

    This isn't something she saud, but what she did. MIL and BIL flew from Alice to Darwin the day before the rest of us. Our charter arrived, with dp's coffin, as the Melbourne cup was being run. BIL posted later that day on Facebook, congratulating his mum on winning the best dressed award at their local sportsclub's Melbourne Cup day!

    MIL and BIL put a notice in the paper, saying DP was son of...brother of...uncle and uncle in law to...and great-uncle to... But no mention of myself or his 3 kids. I read that after the funeral, and the same day I saw a screen shot of BIL's Facebook status calling me a ****ing ******* for turning off DP's life support before he could see him. No mention of the fact that DP wouldn't have lasted more than a couple of hours longer, and BIL didn't fly in til after lunch the next day. What burns me is that the girls saw that on his feed and it devastated them, because we all made the decision together. No prizes for telling BIL that story...

    And lastly, before DP's funeral she told me she'd decided not to make a claim against DP's estate! I suppose it's good of her to not make a claim, but I was gobsmacked that a grandparent would even consider it. The estate is all that's standing between me and DS being on the streets, and is the last gift DP can give his children!

    Ugh, sorry it's become a vent. I spent years pushing for DP and my DSDs to have more to do with MIL, because I think family is important. But no matter what I do, it's never enough for her. The best way I can sum it up is this. When dsd1 turned 18 in Decmber one of the first things she said was "now no one can make me see her". Sad, hey?
    Awful, so awful. I'm very sorry you've had to put up with this rubbish on top of your partners death.

  4. #354
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    Rutabag I am
    Gobsmacked. She is a biatch. So sorry you had to deal with all that when your DP died. Xx

  5. #355
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rutabaga View Post
    Just a few of the comments from my MIL.

    DS only wanted to be held facing outwards while being bounced and walking around when he was younger, and hated being held by anyone except me and, occasionally, DP. When he was 3 months he was screaming while MIL was visiting, and she insisted on holding him. DP handed him over and reminded her how he liked to be held, but she ignored him and snuggled DS against her shoulder. When he was still crying 3 minutes later she thrust him away from her and glared at him before saying "so you're going to hate me like your sisters do". She ignored him for the rest of the night, and spent a good half hour telling my dad and step mum (who she had just met) that DP's ex had taught the girls to hate her.

    On the same night she told everyone I had stolen a shawl from her. When I said I had thought she wanted me to have it because, you know, she'd given it to me, she replied that if saying that made me feel better... I got the ugly **** thing from the cupboard it had been in since I got it and gave it back to her. She refused it and wanted to know why I was being like that!

    DSD2 and I went in to see her less than a week after DSD2 had overdosed on panadol, because MIL was sooo concerned about her. She didn't once ask DSD2 how she was, just *****ed about how hard her life is and how nobody looks after her or comes to visit. When we were leaving, she grabbed DSD2 and asked when she was going to be a good granddaughter and come to work in her yard! Then she got upset with me for telling her dsd2 was doing year 10, working and had a lot on her plate, but I'd come in if she needed help.

    The day after DP passed away she, DSDs 1 and 2, and dp's ex were having dinner at the hotel restaurant. She told them she didn't understand why I was the person people (hospital, DP's work, funeral homes etc) were asking what to do. "DP and rutabaga aren't married, so they should be asking me, I'm his next of kin". Apparently 9.5 years together, a mortgage, child and plans for the rest of our lives doesn't count for much.

    This isn't something she saud, but what she did. MIL and BIL flew from Alice to Darwin the day before the rest of us. Our charter arrived, with dp's coffin, as the Melbourne cup was being run. BIL posted later that day on Facebook, congratulating his mum on winning the best dressed award at their local sportsclub's Melbourne Cup day!

    MIL and BIL put a notice in the paper, saying DP was son of...brother of...uncle and uncle in law to...and great-uncle to... But no mention of myself or his 3 kids. I read that after the funeral, and the same day I saw a screen shot of BIL's Facebook status calling me a ****ing ******* for turning off DP's life support before he could see him. No mention of the fact that DP wouldn't have lasted more than a couple of hours longer, and BIL didn't fly in til after lunch the next day. What burns me is that the girls saw that on his feed and it devastated them, because we all made the decision together. No prizes for telling BIL that story...

    And lastly, before DP's funeral she told me she'd decided not to make a claim against DP's estate! I suppose it's good of her to not make a claim, but I was gobsmacked that a grandparent would even consider it. The estate is all that's standing between me and DS being on the streets, and is the last gift DP can give his children!

    Ugh, sorry it's become a vent. I spent years pushing for DP and my DSDs to have more to do with MIL, because I think family is important. But no matter what I do, it's never enough for her. The best way I can sum it up is this. When dsd1 turned 18 in Decmber one of the first things she said was "now no one can make me see her". Sad, hey?
    That is horrible! She sounds truly awful.

  6. #356
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    Rutabug I am so sorry. What a b1cth.

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  8. #357
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    @Rutabaga that is horrible. I'm so sorry you had to deal with that on top of the already difficult situation.

  9. #358
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    So MIL complained to DH that me using cloth nappies and the fact I only wash a load of nappies 2-3 times a week make her sick. She's "had no choice but to wash them" herself. Never mind that they are in a bucket with the lid enclosed and I have plenty more nappies and the bucket isn't even 3/4 full.

    Wtf did she do as disposables weren't even around back then?!? Oh that's right she did it all- loads of washing every day, spotless house, all with no help but never mind your kids are all messed up

    On a positive note they told us they are leaving in 3 weeks!!!!! We are barely speaking and I start drinking at 4pm because I'm so freaking miserable. Plus we have pre approval so can buy our own place again (we moved in as a favour to keep their insurance viable whilst they travelled for 6 months).

    The nightmare is slowly coming to an end....
    Last edited by Little Miss Sunshine; 12-01-2015 at 18:33.

  10. #359
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    TheGooch is offline Winner 2014 - Newbie of the Year
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Miss Sunshine View Post
    So MIL complained to DH that me using cloth nappies and the fact I only wash a load of nappies 2 times a week make her sick. She's "had no choice but to wash them" herself. Never mind that they are in a bucket with the lid enclosed and I have plenty more nappies and the bucket isn't even 3/4 full.

    Wtf did she do as disposables weren't even around back then?!? Oh that's right she did it all- loads of washing every day, spotless house, all with no help but never mind your kids are all messed up

    On a positive note they told us they are leaving in 3 weeks!!!!! We are barely speaking and I start drinking at 4pm because I'm so freaking miserable. Plus we have pre approval so can buy our own place again (we moved in as a favour to keep their insurance viable whilst they travelled for 6 months).

    The nightmare is slowly coming to an end....
    Ugh ! I want to give your MIL a taste of her own passive aggressive and otherwise painful medicine!
    I'm glad they're going soon, you guys can buy your own home and whatever you do DO NOT give her a key!!!

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    KitiK  (12-01-2015),Little Miss Sunshine  (12-01-2015)

  12. #360
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    A couple of nights ago she told dd she needed to eat all her dinner up as otherwise she'd end up with a "figure like your mummy"
    Last edited by Little Miss Sunshine; 12-01-2015 at 18:46.


 

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