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  1. #1
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    Default I've been crying for the last two days straight..

    I am very overwhelmed at the moment, and TBH I am tired of going without. I feel like I've made the wrong decision to be with my partner and to have children and that I'm not in the right story (if that makes any sense!).

    I try not to, but I hate everyone. I thought I was doing the right thing by having children when I was younger, but I never thought it would be this hard. Trying to be responsible, and not being able to have any freedom. My partner wanting to be able to take care of me all of the time, and me not wanting to be taken care of, but I feel bad to hurt his feelings and so I let him.

    I just want to work and have a life, not be stuck in someone else's shadow. I thought I was doing the right thing.

    I feel like because of these poor choices I have made that I'm never going to be normal, I'm never going to be happy.

  2. #2
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    Oh Hun it can take some time to feel like your new life with children has 'gelled.' You are not alone.

    Are you a SAHM? If so perhaps working outside the home would give you some independence, freedom and zest for life. I love working, for me it's essential.

    Hang in there.

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    Hugs xx I couldn't read and not respond.
    Do you make time to do things for yourself? For me that is a priority or I start to lose myself in my family.
    Would counselling help?
    Hang in there x

  4. #4
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    harvs is offline Winner 2014 - Spirit of BubHub Award
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    I know you've been struggling for a while. Please don't take this the wrong way, but where are you at in your cycle? Even though I've had AF for over 20 years, I still have times where I cry for days straight and feel like the world is ending, and then two days later I'm like 'oh! That's right...'

    I'm not suggesting your feelings aren't genuine, just that that's usually what I try to think on first when I get this way. Then the second question is am I sleeping enough and eating properly?

    Have you told your partner how you're feeling? It seems to me like you're struggling with a loss of independence, which it think is completely valid and very common with young children. Is there something you could do to expand your horizons ie a short course, volunteer somewhere one morning a week etc that will take your head out of your situation right now and feel like you are setting up a pathway for your own story too?

    Huge hugs, it's horrible when you feel that low x

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    Quote Originally Posted by harvs View Post
    I know you've been struggling for a while. Please don't take this the wrong way, but where are you at in your cycle? Even though I've had AF for over 20 years, I still have times where I cry for days straight and feel like the world is ending, and then two days later I'm like 'oh! That's right...'

    I'm not suggesting your feelings aren't genuine, just that that's usually what I try to think on first when I get this way. Then the second question is am I sleeping enough and eating properly?

    Have you told your partner how you're feeling? It seems to me like you're struggling with a loss of independence, which it think is completely valid and very common with young children. Is there something you could do to expand your horizons ie a short course, volunteer somewhere one morning a week etc that will take your head out of your situation right now and feel like you are setting up a pathway for your own story too?

    Huge hugs, it's horrible when you feel that low x
    I did question this earlier today. I am not used to having normal regular- ish cycles, but thinking about it I did feel this last month. I have also been incredibly tired this week, waking up still tired, which is not normal at all for me.

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    It's bloody hard work. Hugs

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    I felt the same way as you do. I went out and started to study (slowly at first) and now i work and study and have my 3 babies. I just needed more and there is nothing wrong with that at all. Maybe try volunteering at the local aged care facility or take up some part time study.

    Good luck

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    I used to feel like I was just support crew to DH and DD but it's not as bad now. She's a bit older which makes it easier, but it was incredibly hard on the home front, I just had to be strong and if I made a decision about doing something for myself. In my case it was work, others might be sport or volunteering or something that is just for you, not them.

    Perhaps if DH is giving you support you need to say - you know what, I appreciate that but what I'd really like is to go horseriding/part-time work/study/whatever. Men are atrocious mind readers so unless you let him know, he probably has no idea. Figure out what you really want to do first, make a plan, start dreaming. We're in a much different place to where we were even 1 year ago, so things change.

    Good luck xx


 

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