I wrote a massive reply and the stupid thing wouldn't let me post
I will continue trying to speak to the principal tomorrow. I stated in my email what it was regarding, and I made it clear to the receptionist I spoke to how urgent it was and it was regarding a serious incident involving dd1. If I haven't been successful in talking to him by end of school tomorrow I will be going and speaking to the police to see what they recommend.
Dd1 was unusually subdued this arv when I picked her up. We went to a friends house and she cheered up a bit until we walked in the door. There was a little boy there about 4 years old and dd1 instantly withdrew and hid herself in the cubby beside us playing by herself. Even my friend commented on how unlike her it was. Dd2 started playing with dd1 and she cheered up a bit until the boy went in, next thing dd1 is bawling her eyes out and said the boy called her a "nudie bum head". Normally something like that wouldn't bother her, she would just come and dob and be on her way. I managed to calm her down and she hid inside playing by herself. The little boy left and she was out playing and happy almost straight away.
Then tonight she accidentally bumped dd4, and dd4 started crying. Dd1 would usually just say it was an accident and she was sorry but tonight she was hysterical. she couldnt talk and was doing the gasping crying (you know how when you get so worked up and you take big gasps but it feels like you cant breathe?). I managed to calm her down enough she could put a few words together and asked her what was wrong. She lost it again and said "because of what *boys name* did to me. It embarrassed me and made me feel so sad". I asked if she wanted to go to school tomorrow. Its swimming day, which is her favourite day. She said no.
My heart is breaking for her. This isnt my happy bubbly girl. The only way I can describe her after today, even just the look in her eyes, is broken. Even ages ago when she was being bullied constantly about her weight, I never saw the sadness and hurt in her eyes that I see now.