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  1. #1
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    Default If I'm really honest..

    I don't love my DP. I see a future for us but I do not want to marry him. I know every relationship has it's ebbs and flows. He does make a genuine effort.. But it doesn't seem to do anything to make me feel anything toward him.

    Kids and stress are certainly getting in the way, but I've been feeling pretty numb to him for a while.

    Normal?

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    If you were saying you had issues to work on but still loved him then yes. To say you don't love him though IMO no that's not a normal relationship. I could not be with someone I truly didn't love.

    Do you want to work on getting the love back or do you think it's totally gone?

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    Mummy5ormore  (08-11-2014)

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    im sorry you feel like this.... i am going through the same with my DH of 12 yrs..

    I am no longer in love with him ... its hard

    i hope that you work things out...

    im a PM away if you wish to talk, vent...

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    Nomia  (08-11-2014)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Colbie View Post
    If you were saying you had issues to work on but still loved him then yes. To say you don't love him though IMO no that's not a normal relationship. I could not be with someone I truly didn't love.

    Do you want to work on getting the love back or do you think it's totally gone?
    Don't get me wrong, we are absolutely best of friends, we share similar interests and we have fun, but he's can be very negative whereas I am a go-getter so to speak. It doesn't feel like he wants to live his life to the fullest, and I very much do. He makes me feel trapped.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Louise41 View Post
    im sorry you feel like this.... i am going through the same with my DH of 12 yrs..

    I am no longer in love with him ... its hard

    i hope that you work things out...

    im a PM away if you wish to talk, vent...
    Thank you so much. We have nearly 10 years under our belt. I spent my entire 20's with him. He's a fantastic person but I think I just want more from my life..

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    Quote Originally Posted by Nomia View Post
    Thank you so much. We have nearly 10 years under our belt. I spent my entire 20's with him. He's a fantastic person but I think I just want more from my life..

    oh i totally understand that feeling

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    Nomia  (08-11-2014)

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    I have been having similar issues with my dh. We have been together almost 12 years and married for 6.
    When we get along its great then other times we wonder why are we together?
    One question I asked him was what are the positives and negatives in our relationship. And we are working on those atm. But I am at the stage of thinking do I really want to make the effort?
    Would counselling help (together or just for you) just so you could get a clearer idea on what to do next?

    Sent from my GT-I9195T using The Bub Hub mobile app

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    Nomia  (08-11-2014)

  12. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by siesmum View Post
    I have been having similar issues with my dh. We have been together almost 12 years and married for 6.
    When we get along its great then other times we wonder why are we together?
    One question I asked him was what are the positives and negatives in our relationship. And we are working on those atm. But I am at the stage of thinking do I really want to make the effort?
    Would counselling help (together or just for you) just so you could get a clearer idea on what to do next?

    Sent from my GT-I9195T using The Bub Hub mobile app
    TBH, I have been trying for a long time. I give and give and give.. and it doesn't change. I have even tried to redirect my energy toward myself, including finishing off my studies and feeling better about myself via skin care, working out, dietary changes ect..

    I get the feeling that he doesn't want me to be more "successful" than he is. He says he doesn't mind, but that's not what his actions say. All I see is him sabotaging my attempts to study and really be able to focus. And it makes me incredibly mad. I never saw myself as a SAHM, but I gave it all I had anyway.

    Sorry, I just feel incredibly trapped and frustrated. Vent over.

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    What if you got out and worked? Maybe a spark in your life might ignite other areas. I hate being a sham hate hate hate it. Was was a better person working.

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    Nomia  (08-11-2014)

  15. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by lilypily View Post
    What if you got out and worked? Maybe a spark in your life might ignite other areas. I hate being a sham hate hate hate it. Was was a better person working.
    I 100% agree that I was a better person with a good job and freedom.

    I'm in the last 6 months of my degree, finishing in June. We have a holiday booked for May as a last harrah before I re-enter the workforce. I think my anger stems from that I might not even graduate the way things are going.


 

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