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  1. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by harvs View Post
    So they kinda sorta invited themselves?

    In that case, as family, I would expect as a minimum that they don't create more work for you. So that means cleaning up after themselves etc. offering to cook a meal one night.
    Yep.. I haven't invited my parents over for quite a while. They invite themselves for appointments etc

    I agree with the 'don't create more work for you' thing. I've actually labelled all houseguests into several categories:
    - positive influence (ie have a positive helpful effect)
    - neutral influence (any help is cancelled out by the work they create)
    - negative influence (create more work than they are worth)

    I've told hubby that during periods of anticipated stress (new bub, back to work, busy at work etc) only positive guests are allowed to stay.

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    MsViking  (06-11-2014)

  3. #42
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    Hard one. I dont expect too much other then them generally tidying after themselves. Picking up dishes amd putting them in the kitchen, hanging wet towels and dirty clothes.

    If I stay with friends I personally do dishes, help with meal prep, offer to buy food or if they say no get snacks/wine & pick up after us. I always clean up after DD (food, toys etc) and strip the bed when we leave!

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  4. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    Didn't get home until 6...
    Bub/toddler/hubby Showers
    Breastfeed baby
    Unpack shopping
    Clean up baby spew on lounge
    Cook toddler dinner as forgot it wasn't pre-prepared like it usually is
    Feed toddler
    Play with baby
    Clean up veggies toddler spat out
    Toddler in naughty corner x 1
    Bub in bed at 7
    Feed toddler rest of dinner
    Clean crayon off tiles
    Toddler in naughty corner x 2
    Wrap present that has to be posted next day
    Clean mess from kids dinner
    Clean poo from potty
    Check bub hub
    Duck off to have a shower
    Prep adults dinner
    Toddler teeth, book
    8pm toddler in bed
    8:00-8:30 cook dinner for adults

    Yeah room for improvement I know. But to have a reasonably familiar house guest sit on their **** while all this goes on ... wait for dinner to be served... then leave their plate/empty beer bottle on the table... I'm calling that lazy and inconsiderate.
    I agree, that's not cool.

  5. #44
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    I think it's nice that people are saying they don't expect much of guests but I wonder what that means about when you're a guest at someone else's house - do you expect to be waited on there?

    My inlaws came to watch our son once a fortnight this year, staying two days/ one night each time. They would watch the baby, take him and the dog for walks, feed him change him etc during the day. House would always be quite tidy when I got home. Evenings I'd cook dinner and they'd take their stuff to the kitchen and try to wash up, we would always tell them not to. Often during the day MIL would do a load or two of washing and FIL would mow the lawn or do something outside - we didn't ask them to do these things but they wanted to help and feel useful.

    I'd be surprised if a guest of any duration didn't at least offer to help out with dinner or to do the washing up afterwards - usually I'll turn them down but I think it's good manners to offer at least.

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    MsViking  (06-11-2014)

  7. #45
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    I think as Grandparents giving you a hand with the kids isnt unreasonable. What would they do if you asked them to look after the kids while you did dinner?.I cant get DD off the Grandmothers!

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  8. #46
    Witwicky's Avatar
    Witwicky is offline A closed mouth gathers no foot.
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    Not a single thing. Especially if it's just 4 days...

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    Rose&Aurelia&Hannah  (06-11-2014)

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    Quote Originally Posted by BettyW View Post
    I think it's nice that people are saying they don't expect much of guests but I wonder what that means about when you're a guest at someone else's house - do you expect to be waited on there?

    My inlaws came to watch our son once a fortnight this year, staying two days/ one night each time. They would watch the baby, take him and the dog for walks, feed him change him etc during the day. House would always be quite tidy when I got home. Evenings I'd cook dinner and they'd take their stuff to the kitchen and try to wash up, we would always tell them not to. Often during the day MIL would do a load or two of washing and FIL would mow the lawn or do something outside - we didn't ask them to do these things but they wanted to help and feel useful.

    I'd be surprised if a guest of any duration didn't at least offer to help out with dinner or to do the washing up afterwards - usually I'll turn them down but I think it's good manners to offer at least.
    I dont think not expecting guests to help equates to people not offering to help when they are guests themselves. I will always offer to help, do the dishes, I try to play with kids if their parents are busy etc. But I just don't expect others to do things at my house.

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    Rose&Aurelia&Hannah  (06-11-2014)

  12. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by BettyW View Post
    I think it's nice that people are saying they don't expect much of guests but I wonder what that means about when you're a guest at someone else's house - do you expect to be waited on there?

    My inlaws came to watch our son once a fortnight this year, staying two days/ one night each time. They would watch the baby, take him and the dog for walks, feed him change him etc during the day. House would always be quite tidy when I got home. Evenings I'd cook dinner and they'd take their stuff to the kitchen and try to wash up, we would always tell them not to. Often during the day MIL would do a load or two of washing and FIL would mow the lawn or do something outside - we didn't ask them to do these things but they wanted to help and feel useful.

    I'd be surprised if a guest of any duration didn't at least offer to help out with dinner or to do the washing up afterwards - usually I'll turn them down but I think it's good manners to offer at least.
    God no, when am a guest at someones house I tidy up after myself and the kids, offer to help with cleaning/cooking/buy take away for dinner etc. If they tell me its not necessary, fine I will respect that. Thankfully the only people we stay with is my grandad or my mum so its pretty casual anyway.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BettyW View Post
    I think it's nice that people are saying they don't expect much of guests but I wonder what that means about when you're a guest at someone else's house - do you expect to be waited on there?
    .
    Good question... Hubby and I are usually busy containing the kids and stopping them from breaking things.. That's a full time job! I usually try to show good faith by buying groceries and if we are staying 2-3 nights then 1 night we will either cook or buy everyone take away. Try to clean up after ourselves. Always try to offer help "can I chop something up?" "Let me wipe that bench" but a lot of the time I feel bad as by the time the kids are sorted the cleaning up has been taken care of...

  14. #50
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    LifeInShadesOfGrey is offline Just a little bit silly :)
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    A guest staying for 4 nights? I wouldn't expect them to do anything.

    When my brother stays for 3 months, he has to pay board and do house chores lol.


 

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