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  1. #1
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    Default Help! My toddler won't go to bed!

    Hi everyone,

    I need some advice from anyone who's experienced this.

    I'm at my wits end with my DD - she is 27 mths and we recently had a baby who is now 4 weeks old.

    She has always been a golden sleeper, 3 hours nap during the day and bed by 7 at night without a peep.

    Now since I have been home with DS she is getting progressively worse and now screams when I put her to bed, won't nap and is exhausted. Last night she went to sleep at 11pm only because I nursed her on my lap until she drifted off.

    I understand this is probably pretty normal, but need some help as to how to deal with it - don't want to start any new habits that I can't sustain. Also don't want to leave her crying which normally I'm ok with, but DD is obviously feeling a bit put out with the new baby and struggling with the shared attention - maybe feeling a little neglected in her mind. I don't want to reinforce this by leaving her to be upset in bed for hours when what she is looking for is a little extra love.

    Any tips?

    Thank you so much!

  2. #2
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    Is it because she isn't tired? Three hours sleep during the day seems alot for that age.

    Ds just turned two a few weeks ago and has been fighting me on going to bed also. I've been wondering if his two hour sleep during the day is too much and it's just he's not tired at bedtime now.

  3. #3
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    I've been thinking that. Cut it to 1.5 hours yesterday and she screamed til 11pm, cut it out altogether today and she's still awake and it's 7.45pm....I really have no idea!

  4. #4
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    DD is 3yo and I have a 14wk DS. DD has started protesting bedtime and waking through night. I think it's pretty normal for them to do this when a sibling comes along. I think it's partly acting out and wanting attention and partly them taking advantage of our weakness (probably letting them get away with more than we did before because we're sensitive to their feelings of displacement).

    We're getting tough with DD, no more getting up and banging around in her room for hours, not tolerating any tantrums during the dinner/bath/bed routine and trying to be as consistent as possible with timings.

    It's hard but I know our persistence will pay off, she's had bouts of this behaviour in the past and we've got it back on track by sticking to our guns. Otherwise she exploits every opportunity and before we know it bedtime is dragging our for an hour or more!

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    Don't drop the day nap. You don't want to make it worse by having her really overtired and cranky. An overtired toddler can be very hard to get to sleep and keep asleep! My DD still naps 1-3hrs in the middle of the day at 3yo and goes a bit feral without that sleep. I know the issue is behavioral, it's not about her not being tired.

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    She may just be pushing the limits and getting your attention after the new arrival. My DD did the same and it took a lot of time and affection with her to get back on track. I also reduced her nap time to 1hr. She still needed a nap so she didn't get overtired but sometimes it was only every second day. I also gave her lots of one on one time and had to let the house work go a bit so I could devote time to her. When DS was about 3 months everything settled down. I never thought it would end! So my tip would be to give her as much time as you can and do fun things that make her feel special.
    Best of luck
    Last edited by Redcorset; 05-11-2014 at 19:22.

  7. #7
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    I've been thinking that. Cut it to 1.5 hours yesterday and she screamed til 11pm, cut it out altogether today and she's still awake and it's 7.45pm....I really have no idea!

  8. #8
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    Both my kids dropped day naps around that age. Bedtimes got later and later until I had to stop the naps. Instantly back to early bedtime.

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    No tips, just here to say DITTO!
    A two year old (25 months) with a 3 month old and he cries more at bed time than she does. I see it as cries for attention that he wants/needs. I try to give him more attention during the day when the baby's sleeping. But I don't know what to do about the tears at bedtime.

    ETA - just a one hour nap here.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hollywood View Post
    Both my kids dropped day naps around that age. Bedtimes got later and later until I had to stop the naps. Instantly back to early bedtime.
    Exactly the same here.


 

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